Animation Revelation Features

Goodbye Blogger...

2011-12-14T23:24:00.002-05:00

Now that we've got legitimate hosting(!) and a domain name(!!), I figured it was high time we moved on over to a self-hosted WordPress page.

Check it out, update your bookmarks and RSS stuff, and stay tuned for more animation-related articles!

Saturday Morning Slugfest: 1989 by Lord Dalek

2011-12-14T14:31:00.002-05:00

Time was, long ago, that on Saturday Mornings you could flip from one network to another and watch kids shows of varying quality and all lacking in anything resembling educational content. These were the good, ol days. The days when you either complained about College Football interupting Bugs and Tweety, scratched your hairoff about how NBC could run Smurfs and Gummie Bears back to back or just throw your hands up and watch whatever CBS had on. To celebrate this long dead phenomenon, I bring you Saturday Morning Slugfest where I will look at one season of Saturday Morning cartoons and decide who's year was the best...or the least sucky at least. To start off, I choose the year I started caring about cartoons on Saturday mornings (let alone TV in general) 1989! Hang on to your hats, this is going to be bumpy and nostalgic.

CBS

After getting clobbered by NBC and Smurfs for the first half of the decade CBS had made major gains since 1985 with Muppet Babies, Pee-wee's Playhouse and Garfield and Friends so its not surprising to see those shows basically anchoring a block that's riding on its own laurels and not much else. Frankly the new shows CBS had this season were some of the worst they ever had...

DINK THE LITTLE DINOSAUR

Uh...wow. Unless you told me this was a Ruby-Spears production, I'd have guessed it was a cheap Taiwanese Land Before Time ripoff (I wonder if Don Bluth considered legal action?). Dink and friends Amber, Scat, Shyler, and Flapper have fun in the Great Val-er... Green Meddow(!) with the usual heavy handed moralizing bullshit at the end of each episode. Surprisingly this got a second season where it was buried at noon with perennial rear-bearer CBS Storybreak.

THE CALIFORNIA RAISIN SHOW

Ick. Its one thing to make a tv show out a popular line of claymation advertisements, its another to make it and not even bother with clamation. I can only guess Wil Vinton wasn't prepared for the workload of a series of 13 episodes so instead we have a fugly traditionally animated show where the singing raisins (who are more brown than purple in this show) fight other fruits and veggies for their share of the Hollywood spotlight. I can only imagine Murakami Wolf Swenson shoved this down the eye network's throat as bargaining material for the rights to a certain moderately successful show of theirs then currently running in syndication...

RUDE DOG AND THE DWEEBS

Remember Rude Dog? Nope? Good! Neither do I! This show ran only one season and was a tie-in with a clothing line for skateboarders (yes this was the “hip” show on this year's lineup as opposed to Dink). Mr. Opportunity (frmrly. Rob Paulson) plays the titular Poochie, a mechanic assisted by his gang The Dweebs as they toil through the travails of evil cats and dog catchers. In other words, its the Cadillac Cats from Heathcliffe except even less interesting.

THE VERDICT: If CBS was hurting for ratings (they weren't) then this year would be a genuine disaster. None of the shows are any good and the latter two would be ritually sacrificed the following year for TMNT. Oh and IIRC, this was the first year with Fido Dido on the bumpers (seriously, who the fuck remembers Fido Dido?)

ABC

Remarkably, ABC only added two new shows this year (a record low for them) and technically only one of them was actually new. I guess they had to save money from their famous “After These Messages...” bumpers.

THE ADVENTURES OF THE GUMMI BEARS

Lets not kid ourselves, this is not a new show. Gummi Bears had of course previously been on NBC since 1985 but following a contract dispute would wind up spending its second-to-last season on ABC instead where it would replace the first half-hour of The New Adventures of Winnie The Pooh, it was a short lived arrangement and Pooh would run in various lengths over the next decade (I remember the show being 90 minutes long at one point).

BEETLEJUICE

You want a shock success, this is it. The Beetlejuice cartoon ran two whole years on ABC and even managed to switch networks (to Fox of all things) to prolong its life. Ignoring the ending of the movie, BG and Lydia basically spend every episode hanging out together and getting involved in a variety of strange adventures. Ran for 94 episodes. NINETY-FRICKEN-FOUR.

THE VERDICT: Its a “if it aint broke don't fix it” season. With four returning shows (two of which were hour long), there was little space for innovation. Heck, considering Gummi Bears was an NBC castoff, the only new show ABC produced this season was Beetlejuice. Record low does not begin to describe it.

NBC

As mentioned earlier, NBC started this season without Gummi Bears and by the end of the season would lose two more shows. Smurfs had gone from a ratings monster to a whimpering willow against Muppet Babies the previous two seasons and this would be its final year. Also Alf Tales would be cancelled as well (thank god).

CAMP CANDY

Camp Candy features an animated John Candy (voicing himself) as the owner of a summer camp. He and his kids get into a variety of misadventures with the usual use of moralizing and important life skills to set things right at the end of each episode. Frankly I remember never really liking this show but somebody did since it lasted into the next season.

CAPTAIN N: THE GAME MASTER

YAY! ITS CAPTAIN N!!! Today this show could only elicit groans of embarrassment from any old-school gamer but back then it was the shit. Dorky high schooler Kevin gets sucked into his Nintendo through “THE ULTIMATE WARPZONE!!!!!1” to help Princess Lana and some rather badly mischaracterized video game characters fight the evil (and about as equally mischaracterized) Mother Brain. Would survive until NBC finally pulled the plug on Saturday Morning Toons in favor of...

SAVED BY THE BELL

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

THE KARATE KID

Never saw this show but from the looks of it, Daniel-san and Mister Miyagi go looking for some mystical mumbo-jumbo with the help of some Asian chick. Where the heck is Cho-sen or the Cobra-kais when you need them?

THE VERDICT: NBC came into this year in a rebuilding phase and during this season would find its answer. Unfortunately its an answer that isn't animated. Saved by the Bell turned out to be a surprise hit and eventually more shows of that ilk would fill out the schedule as the Peacock eventually replaced all cartoons with yet another Today show. Frankly we should be grateful for Qubo these days, it used to be so much worse.

THE FINAL VERDICT

This is a season where you have a network basically playing it safe, another green-lighting shows its already cancelled and finally one about to make the worst decision of all time. Out of this, I've got to give it to ABC since you've still got Real Ghostbusters and Bugs Bunny & Tweety to watch. Next year: CBS scores the Smurfs-Killer after Smurfs has already been killed and a fourth party enters the fray for the first time.

And they say I'm not a team player. (Injustice For All) by Desensitized

2011-12-08T23:22:00.002-05:00

The cold opening shows us something we never thought possible; Lex Luthor has beaten Superman. As he stands over his Kryptonite infected body, he tells Superman how he managed to sneak one past him... Until he learns that Superman isn't really Superman at all! It's the Martian Manhunter, and the Justice League has finally trapped Luthor! He makes a run for it, but he's simply no match for the new team and as he's catured by the Man of Steel he passes out in pain. It turns out Luthor is dying, his years of paranoia of Superman lead him to wear kryptonite around his neck, poisoning his body.

In many people's opinions, this was when Justice League started working. Lex goes mad trying to find a way to save his life, cobbling together a team of his own to take on the League while in pursuit of a cure. How this works is that every villain is given their own chance to shine in both personality and plot, they are all a formidable threat to the Justice League making this one of the first times in the series where the team of seven is actually fully needed for a mission to succeed. It is here where we see that Justice League becomes Justice League.

The first half of the first episode is pretty standard, mostly the League in action saving the day, however it becomes interesting when Luthor's team comes together and instantly dislike each other. The interactions between all of them, and the way the plot unfolds is the first time the show really proves to us that it has become its own entity. It's no longer "Batman and Superman and those other guys", but a world where super beings -both hero and villain- are larger than life, and at odds with each other in order to shape the world as they see fit. This is a motif used more in the Unlimited portion of the show, but it first rears its head here. What makes the first part of the episode stand out are two things, one being the big battle royale between Luthor's team and the League, and the second being the first appearance of a specific character at episode's end. It works great as a fleshing out of the core concept of the two teams, but it pales in comparison to what the second part offers.

The second episode is just plain exciting, with characters playing off of each other, fights that are choreographed wonderfully, and features one great moment after another. Batman manipulating the bad guys, the Joker being a pest, Superman trying to be intimidating to Copperhead and failing, and the League's tactical invasion of the enemy base. It all culminates in an explosive finale of super beat-downs with bodies flying everywhere and a bit of a twist ending that is not one to be seen coming.

The only real negative one could really put upon 'Injustice For All' is the overall focus on the villains and only about half of the League in comparison. It's a bit of a shame, but not really anything to complain about with material this fun that's an undeniable step up from most material so far. The first season might have been a bit generic overall but this was one of the few standouts of the early episodes, finally showing the potential a true Justice League show could give us. It's also nice seeing an episode where Superman isn't made to look like a chump to make the episode work.

Infinite Stratos -- Infinitely Awful Part 3 by Kiddington

2011-12-02T17:15:00.003-05:00

Episode 3 -- The Transfer Student is the Second Childhood Friend

If the poorly translated title is sure to be any indication, it'll be a good bet that another one of Ichika's ghosts will pop up at some point in this episode. Oh, sure, they say friend, but a "friend" in this show might as well just mean "crazy bitches who try to skewer you with wooden swords". Ichika doesn't seem to be the kind of personable fellow that can easily hit it off with strangers (or, really, anyone for that matter), so if this mystery person doesn't already hate him, he'll probably stick his foot squarely in his mouth within the first 20 seconds of conversation to change those feelings. Or so I assume.

No comment.

It's Training Day at the IS academy, and since Denzel Washington is nowhere within earshot, it'll be up to our fair lass - the Commander in Chief herself - to show these kids the ropes. Par for the course in the world of IS, the contradictory nonsense that we've had to stomach at least a couple of times in the first two episodes rears its ugly head once again; remember how Ichika could almost flawlessly pilot an IS in the last episode, as he went toe-to-toe with that crazy British chick? Yeah, well, they're having none of that here. Ichika, bungling idiot that he is, seems to have completely forgotten everything that he knew just one short episode ago. He can't get off the ground. He can barely keep it up in the air. He can't keep up with what's her face (whom he almost mopped the floor with in battle during the previous episode, need I remind us all). He can't even land the damn thing for crying out loud. Honestly, it's times like these that I absolutely refuse to believe that this guy is supposed to be their white knight, the one and only barrier of protection fictional Japan has from complete and utter robot destruction. I don't get it; I really don't. They paint an early picture of him as some sort of demigod, with all that "only male human being in the entire WORLD that can pilot an IS" noise, yet, all things considered, he really can't fly one. Or, well, I guess he can under "certain circumstances", or some such. I still don't even know myself, and I don't think anyone in charge of this show does either.

Sadly, the contradictions do not end here. You remember how Cecilia absolutely loathed Ichika in the first two episodes because of his seeming "disrespect" towards her shimmering greatness? Yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaah... well, again, none of that. All of a sudden - ALL OF A SUDDEN - she's in love with him. Seemingly out of nowhere, with the mere flick of a wrist, she's got the hots for Ich. Again, I just don't get it. How do you go from wanting to tear the mans off in one episode, to trying to steal his heart, and his pants, the next? Not only is this show as dreadfully boring as you can possibly imagine, but it's also incredibly irritating in nearly every physical sense (ESPECIALLY when it comes to character development, which they fail miserably at). And yet, here I am, watching it. Is this what rock bottom feels like? Is this what the televisions in hell are all programmed to air? Sometimes I wonder.

Guess what happened here. Go ahead, guess.

As the dust settles and the mediocrity continues, every character of importance says their piece on Ichika's recent crash landing; his sister calls him an idiot, Houki scolds him for not adhering to her teachings, and... wait for it... Cecilia BURSTS onto the scene, pushes everybody aside like she's running out of a burning building, slides down the crater, and rushes to tend aide to her boy Ich. Either this is some sort of front, and she's faking genuine emotion for who only knows whatever reason, or the show has officially become so ridiculous that there's just no going back. Watching her swoon over this man (and, later, even going as far as forfeiting her coveted role as "Class Representative" to him just to get that much closer to his penis), whilst previously wishing him nothing but misery and bodily harm is something I simply cannot begin to understand (all happening in the time span of about one or two days, no less). Houki doesn't take too kindly to this behavior from Le Brit, obviously, and it doesn't take a genius to figure out what's going to happen next. Let the titties fly!

You KNEW this was coming.

Moving on; as the title eludes, we should be expecting a new face to pop up at any time here. The hint dropping is already in full force by this point; she's a transfer student from China, she's slated to be the Class Representative for Class 2, she has her own personal IS, and she's supposed to be REALLY REALLY STRONG. Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Rinin Fan; another childhood friend of Ichika who, like every other childhood friend of his, acts like a bit of a stuck up bitch. And this is just her natural personality; he didn't even have to say anything dumb this time around to get such treatment. Lucky guy.

After pleasantries are exchanged, and everyone says their piece on the new girl, we're treated to a bit of a half-assed backstory on how Ichika came to be in this situation of his. Originally, he was supposed to go to a normal high school, like every other normal, useless male child that cannot operate the glorious badassery known as an IS suit. On his way to the high school placement exam, however, he got lost within the confines of the very large building that the exams were being held in... and as fate would have it, the room he just so happens to stumble into contains but nothing more than a single IS suit, sitting right in front of him. He walks in, he touches it, it reacts to him (which as we all know by now, is supposed to be IMPOSSIBLE for a male to do), yada yada yada, we go from there. It's probably one of the most brief, boring backstories I've ever seen... but really, what should I be expecting out of this? I mean, this is Ichika Orimura we're talking about here; it's not like he's Batman or anything.

A Hero Is Born... or something like that.

By this point in the episode, the girls have all met Rinin (who's lightened up on Ich, and now seems to be zeroing in on his pants), and they've already seen enough to determine that a 3-way rivalry between her, Cecilia, and Houki is now in order. They bicker, they bitch, and they all show EXTREME amounts of jealousy towards one another, all in an effort to win over the affections of one very stupid young man. You know, I can still remember the good old days when Cecilia and Houki both hated Ichika, and that was in Episode 2. Sigh...

Fast-forward to Ichika's personal IS training session with two of his three harem lovers, and... awwww, lame! They skipped it! I was expecting to see Ich get blasted out of the sky by two flying robot chicks, but they skipped the whole damn thing! Man, this show sucks. It's not even entertaining enough to be considered a guilty pleasure; it's just as painfully boring and inane as you could possibly imagine something could be. And we're still not done! There's still 10 grueling minutes left. Why did I agree to do this? Have I become some sort of television masochist without even realizing it?

...anyway, following all of that, Ichika finds himself alone in a locker room. A short time later, Rinin struts onto the scene, and begins visibly hitting on him. Ich, of course, is too dumb to notice, and insults her a couple of times without even realizing it (why do the ladies even like this guy? Seriously, he's a fucking idiot). She becomes quite distraught when she hears that Ich and Houki share a room together, and begins interrogating Ich on the nature of their relationship. He insists that they're just childhood friends, and even implies that the only reason she's his roommate is because he'd be too nervous to room with someone he doesn't know, and would probably be unable to sleep in the process. Uh-huh. Strangely enough, I believe it.

Rinin takes these vague implications to heart, and actually asks Houki to switch rooms with her, so she can room with Ich. Yeah, you know very well where this is going; Rinin and Houki have it out for a bit, exchanging catty remarks and what all, until Rinin makes the grave mistake of ignoring Houki, and attempts to carry on a conversation with Ich by himself. Whoops. Houki will not stand for such treatment, as she lunges for her sword, and attempts to strike down that rude bitch with a swift vertical slice. Rinin, however, is no novice to combat, and "partial deploys" her IS, blocking Houki's attack, and tearing down her ego in the process. Tempers appear to have cooled for now... of course, until Ichika bumbles in with yet another one of his trademark foot-in-mouth moments (something along the lines of saying Rinin be his slave and cook him meals everyday, or not remembering a promise he made with her, or some crap like that; honestly, I'm fading in and out at this point). Rinin gets pissed, says she hopes he gets bitten by a dog and dies (ouch!), and challenges him to an all-out robotic slug fest. Welp, there goes that love triangle. At least he's still got Houki, right? Au Contraire; Houki was also very much insulted by Ich's insensitive attitude, and says to him... wait for it... that she hopes he gets kicked by a horse and dies. Umm... yeah, this is totally coming from one of the same girls who's supposed to have a crush on him. Only a guy like Ichika could successfully piss off two people this much at once, thus further making me question why these girls even wanted to be with an oblivious dumbass like this in the first place. Ah well; I guess if all else fails, he can always go crawling back to that crazy British chick.

*gasp*

Skipping ahead to next week, Ichika is seen preparing for his death match with Rinin. They strongly imply this girl doesn't mess around, and it appears as though Ich is in for a world of hurt now. Before the match begins, however, Rinin does extend an olive branch, saying that if he apologizes, she'll take it easy on him. He refuses, of course, thus setting himself up for what I'm assuming will be a bloodbath of epic proportions (by IS standards, anyway). The two take their positions, assume battle stance, begin their charge, aaaaaaaaaand... nope. That's it. That's all we get for this episode. Fade to black, cut to credits, exit stage-left, this battle will have to wait another day. Awwww. Normally I'd be more pissed at them for making me wait for something like this, but honestly, I'm just glad that my 22 minutes of personal mind-bending hell is finally over.

...and that's that. For now at least, Ichika appears to have made an enemy out of someone he thought was a friend (all because he's an insensitive jerk - who knew?), and, I guess, it'll be interesting to see if this rivalry develops any further, or she simply beats the snot of him next episode, and they kiss and make up afterwards. Knowing how predictable this has been so far, though, I'm going with the latter. After all, in the grand scheme of this plot, a harem love triangle spotlighting rage, jealousy, girls, and lots and lots of tits is a lot more interesting than any flying robot battle could ever hope to be. Ugh... just the thought of how boring and idiotic this could ultimately get really makes my head hurt. Hell, it's already bad enough now. God, I hate this show.

You would have me crawl to them like some beggar? (The Enemy Below) by Avaitor

2011-12-01T20:28:00.002-05:00

This brings the first appearance of Aquaman in the series. Although he appeared in an episode of Superman: TAS prior to JL, both versions seem to contrast from each other. The S:TAS version had Aquaman resemble his classic self, while the one in "The Enemy Below" has his "badass" look- long hair, shaggy beard, and no shirt, as well as the attitude.

This doesn't make Aquaman all too likable- he comes off rude, impulsive, and a bit of an ass. And to paraphrase Glen Quagmire, he might have got away with all of this if he wasn't such a bore. There isn't really anything to save him in either episodes. There's an attempt to humanize Aquaman by adding a scene or two in about his son, but even those feel artificial.

The basic story is that Aquaman is attempting to protect Atlantis from oncoming nuclear attacks and comes up on land to defend his case. Meanwhile, his brother, Lord Orm, takes over Atlantis, and sends Deadshot out to kill him. I can't help but feel like that at least a few different Namor subplots have been ripped off here, and I'm not even a big Sub-Mariner fan, either.

Timm and co are still working on the show's kinks, and it shows. The Leaguers get little character time, and Aquaman doesn't have much to work with, either. His brotherly feud with Orm isn't any special after seeing how well the Thor movie handled his and Loki's. The scene with Aquaman losing his hand is effective and brings another part of the character in place, but even the peril feels off. The action also feels trite, when present. Almost like lasers shooting off at nothing on sea, and like GI Joes hand-to-hand.

Slightly better than the previous episodes, but it still makes for a wholly average episode. It'll take a top-notch story editor to take things around.

That said, you want to know what the best part of both eps was? "Let me give you one word of advice." Kevin Conroy has not skipped a beat yet.

And Furthermore… (In Blackest Night) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-11-24T18:35:00.002-05:00

For this episode, we get a look at the Green Lantern John Stewart. Back when this show was in its production stages, there was controversy over choosing John as a main character for the show, the two main reasons being that it felt like token casting for some people, as well as the fact that there has already been a Green Lantern in the DCAU, namely Kyle Rayner. So of course, the writers had to quickly prove that he could be an interesting character in his own right. Where Rayner was young, imaginative, and unused to the idea of being among the likes of Superman or Wonder Woman, Stewart shows a more militant approach to things. He doesn’t view being a superhero as something fantastic or amazing, but as a civil duty. This alone helps prove to be an interesting contrast to the worlds he travels as well as creates a certain odd couple relationship that he has with Flash. We also get a few hints in this episode that Stewart’s duty as a Lantern is slowly consuming his life, as we see him in his hometown only reluctantly interacting with the people he grew up with. While we already see this within Batman, it proves to be more interesting seeing this happen for a regular man like John rather than a multi-billionaire.

Unfortunately, this character development gets delivered to us via a poorly maneuvered plot. In it, John is arrested by Manhunters for the accidental destruction of an alien planet that he was accused of by a wanton criminal. Because of this, the court, the jury, the Guardians, and even his fellow Lanterns treat him as a pariah without so much as checking the evidence of whether or not he really did it. I know I’m probably nitpicking, but this element alone undermined whatever quality this story had. The entire plot of these episodes weighs upon the inability for alien law enforcement to even so much as check the “debris” of the planet. Instead, they blindly rely on the word of a common criminal over a Green Lantern acting in self-defense. Even though interactions with some of the aliens imply a less than cordial view of the Corps, it still feels like several characters in the story were being idiots for the sake of the plot.

The villains of the story, the Manhunters, prove to be marginally more interesting than the White Martians, mostly because the twist that they were the predecessors to the Green Lanterns adds an undertone to what the Corps could be like if headed by less altruistic members (which easily could have been shown with Sinestro, but the writers rarely seemed to remember him). However, the plot’s pretty inconsistent as to how strong these guys are. At the beginning, only a handful of them were able to fight the Justice League to a standstill. While by the end, entire legions of Manhunters end up dropping like flies by the hands of the Guardians, several Green Lanterns, and even the same JL members that previously struggled against them. Albeit, this is far from a unique flaw in action shows, but you’d think something like Justice League would be smart enough not to play this trope so dreadfully straight.

So overall, nil for two. While In Blackest Night improves upon the character study that Secret Origins lacked, it has plot holes the size of ostrich eggs.

But on the bright side of things, it does have an amusing scene of Flash trying (and failing) to be Johnny Cochran. If seeing Wally play lawyer doesn’t make you laugh, nothing will.

Do you have any idea how corny that sounds? (Secret Origins) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-11-17T00:27:00.003-05:00

During Earth’s first contact with Mars, astronauts accidentally awaken the White Martians, who slowly breach the defenses of humanity and prepare for their invasion. When this conquest begins, Batman and Superman prove unable to save the world alone and must look for outside help. So with that, Flash, Green Lantern, Wonder Woman, Hawkgirl, and the last original Martian J’onn J’onzz join alongside them to form the Justice League and help Earth face off against oblivion.

When watching previous crossovers such as World’s Finest or The Demon Reborn, one couldn’t help but feel something epic from how Batman and Superman met. It was like the equivalent of seeing Pink Floyd and Iron Maiden join together. It made their universe feel larger, added a level of vibrancy in seeing Lois Lane interact with Batman or Harley fight Mercy Graves, and created the general feeling that shit was going to go down. So when I first saw the commercials for Justice League as a kid, it felt like seeing the pearly gates open while endless swarms of seraphim angels greeted you as if you were a saint.

But now as an adult and looking back at the premiere, with crossovers between DC superheroes about as common as beggars in the alley, it just feels kind of stilted. Admittedly, it holds up a hell of a lot better in comparison to other shows I watched as a kid, but that’s pretty much expected when it comes to DCAU shows. In comparison to the premieres of series from that universe like On Leather Wings, Rebirth, or the Last Son of Krypton, Secret Origins just feels lacking. Maybe it was because the staff wasn’t used to working with so many characters all at once, or that they were too tired from having just finished STAS and wrapping up Batman Beyond. Whatever it was, these three episodes are far from Justice League’s best.

First off, let’s get to how the characters are brought in. The show expects you to have at least known about BTAS and STAS beforehand, so Batman and Superman are introduced with about as much fanfare as any other character. Wonder Woman’s beginning has a bit more set-up by showing Themyscira and her reason for wanting to take up the mantle, and the premiere already does a good and subtle job establishing her character as brash and alien to human culture. The plot also does well in
presenting J’onn in where he came from and what his wants and needs are. However, Flash, Green Lantern, and Hawkgirl just seem like they’re there purely for the sake of it. There’s very little buildup to their appearances, so it just feels random to see them. And though Flash quickly gets revealed to be the comic relief of the team, there’s very little room left to show John and Shayera’s personalities, let alone plant the seeds of their relationship throughout the series. While later episodes will do well in solidifying the cast, the debut of the Justice League feels quite jumbled and unable to properly define each member.

For the villains of this story, the White Martians, it just seems like a bit of a stretch for them to invade Earth so easily. You would think that with previous alien threats like Darkseid or Brainiac, everyone would be better prepared against such a widespread assault. Though the plot tries to explain this weakness with earlier scenes showing the dismantling of nuclear weapons, it just feels too convenient for the plot to portray the military in an almost completely useless matter. And while the use of sunlight as a weakness against them serves as a decent, if not also convenient, way to resolve the story, it also raises questions, such as how no one noticed that a figure as public as a US senator never went outside during the day. I’m far from one to determine what’s odd or not for politicians, but never going into sunlight at all should rise up several red flags at the least.

As for the premise of the episodes, it’s a generic invasion story and nothing more. There are a few twists, like the aforementioned senator being one of the aliens, but none of them are of any particular note as to shock the audience in any way. In short, with too much time taken away to introduce everybody as well as showcase some fight scenes, the main plot has nowhere to grow.

Overall, it definitely feels like the production staff is far from finding their footing. While it does well in spectacle, it lacks when it comes to pulling off a plot for an ensemble cast. Still, a bad first few episodes doesn’t determine the quality of an entire show, and Justice League is a reminder of that.

Kicking Clannad In the Nads (Part 9) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-10-27T23:13:00.008-04:00

Hey, long time no trial.

At nighttime, Tomoya, Nagisa, and Fuko decide to do what any sane teenager would do, i.e. break into school. Tomoya plays the straight man and questions this idea, but Nagisa trusts this path given how her father still remembers Fuko after hearing her name. Since really, how hard can it be to forget this annoying green-haired midget? I know I unfortunately haven’t.

After a few minutes of sitting around while the opening plays, Fuko tears apart the wrappings of her gifts. When Tomoya scolds her for not being patient, she replies, “Even if my head knows it, I can’t control what my hands do.” What a surprise.

She looks at her presents, which just consist of a party hat, some candles, a microphone…. What the hell kind of presents are these?

Fuko orgasms yet again, giving Tomoya the opportunity to steal her hat. She goes into manchild rage and starts attacking Tomoya until she gets back her swag. They both fall onto the floor, leading to Fuko sitting on Tomoya’s lap like a hooker on Christmas.

Tomoya calls Fuko a fatass, then she randomly points out how neither of the two leads call each other by their first names. Wait, she’s making sense for once? Tomoya becomes stupid and says, “That is not a very logical argument.” But since she has it her way, Fuko just forces them to use honorifics and the like. So Tomoya ends up stuttering when trying to say “Nagisa-chan.”

“That just proves that the two of you are more childish than me.” Well said, midget ghost girl.

Tomoya then decides to drop the honorifics like any decent dub should do, and realizes how natural it sounds. Well, duh!

Fuko yet again becomes the sane man in the show by talking about how Tomoya and Nagisa are exactly like Future Tomoya and her sister. She then kisses both of them, which Nagisa replies by wrapping a party hat on her. Having ascended into Teletubby status, Fuko becomes giddy as bloody Blondie and wants to start a party with these… people.

Ignoring the dangers of letting Fuko near fire, they throw a celebration for the sister and her wedding that no one will go to because of Melodrama Ex Machina. They just sit around together for the next few minutes while staring at candles. Realizing that the plot makes no sense, the three all go to sleep. And by the morning, Fuko finally disappears; with the remaining two wondering what the hell they did last night.

Nagisa’s dad assumes that it’s what all of you presume and decides to bring Mr. Bat along to swing at Tomoya before being forced to just attack the air. The Furukawas don’t remember, since apparently even Fuko’s name causes people to forget. Soon after, Tomoya and Nagisa both wonder about the exact purpose of the starfish carvings that they somehow got, yet feel relaxed at the mere look at it, as if it’s their stash.

Kyou wanders in, wondering why the hell Tomoya’s been standing around doing nothing like he’s been acting every other episode. She asks him to shop with her and the doormat, but Kyou gets rejected because Tomoya’s too stupid to write down stuff about Fuko in case he’d forget it.

He sits beside Nagisa and keeps on angsting about what he needs to remember. They both walk by Hitler, who’s writing up a giant sign for the wedding. Wait, the Fuhrer can remember being told about the wedding, but Nagisa and Tomoya can’t? Why? I mean, Ms. Ibuki told them about the wedding. It’s not like she has memory denying powers or whatever the hell this show’s trying to do.

After being reminded of Ms. Ibuki, they finally remember Fuko, which causes her to automatically spawn between them. Tomoya whines about how they could have forgotten such an important commemoration, and then they hug, being so sappy that the Tanners could vomit from watching this.

The next day, they find a bunch of people at the school for the wedding, except the students since they can’t be convinced to give a damn about their teacher unless they get a starfish thrown at them. The show cuts to Future Tomoya putting the wedding ring on Ms. Ibuki. After which, the trio find a hoard of students out and about at the school. Kyou and Ryou appear, just having found their starfish at the exact bloody day of the wedding and being reminded of the wedding unlike Tomoya and Nagisa. Sunohara pops up in a bowtie, because bowties are lame. We then get a brief montage of everybody from Droopy to Glasses Girl appearing at the marriage, even those guys that beat up Sunohara in the first episode.

As the couple march out, Fuko remembers that dream of hers about starfish and shirtless Tomoya, and decides that she’s finally at peace, leading her to finally fucking disappear. Ms. Ibuki notices our humble protagonist crying, hearing him going on about how much he loved her despite how we saw nothing but them acting like bastards to each other. I’ve seen more cordial conversations between Christian fundamentalists and gay pride participants in comparison to how Tomoya and Fuko acted to each other. You’re really going to tell me these two had some special, inseparable bond? Really?

Being Clannad, Fuko appears again to give her sister a starfish only to fade away. Nobody seems to freak out over how a ghost randomly appeared out of nowhere, let alone turned into confetti. After the nuptials, Ms. Ibuki gives a speech about how Fuko can be happy as long as everyone else is happy (and buy Clannad merchandise. One can only be happy if they buy Clannad merchandise. You wouldn’t want Fuko to be unhappy, would you?).

The day after, they forget about Fuko again, yet have really vague memories of her interspersed with the girl going off into the light like in Poltergeist. Tomoya then proceeds to give a monologue as if anything of what we saw means something.
Well, at least Fuko’s gone and will never come back again… Right? Right?

Okay, we finally close off the first arc. Laughs were had, deeds were done, and I became diagnosed for severe clinical depression. As a consolation, the next arc can’t be that bad in comparison—

“Will she bully me?”
“Yes! If you would like me too.”

Fuck… o.

Fall 2011 Anime Clusterfuck - "Do it feel like a crown on yo head... do it?"

2011-10-15T17:42:00.006-04:00

Working’!!

The crew of Wagnaria are back, with pedophilic-to-the-bone Takanashi, misandrist bitch Inami, frothing-bucket-of-abhorrent-midget-jokes Poplar, and some other bastards that I couldn’t give less of a fuck enough to even name them. The plot for this season is… uh; they just hang around and do anything that would get an actual restaurant quarantined or slapped with a cornucopia of lawsuits. The only things that happen involve Takanashi getting pissed over a roach dying, and Poplar trying to grow a pair (of inches).

So yeah, you like unfunny gag shows with utterly no development or depth in the characters other than one joke repeated over and over? Then fuck you for making this series popular enough to have a second season. At least with shit like K-On!, they actually care enough to get some proper production values. Whereas for Working’!! (And the fuck kind of title is that?), even looking at a frame of this makes me groan. Not a single second of this show made me smile in the slightest. Even by slice-of-life standards, this anime is fucking awful. You’re better off watching middle-aged amputee gay scat porn than this.

But on the bright side, it doesn’t have that “Some WAN WAN!” opening.

1/10 - Dr. Insomniac

Bakuman 2

So here we are with season 2 of this writer's favorite currently running manga, Bakuman. The story of Ashirogi Muto's (pen name of artist Mashiro and writer Tagaki) quest to become the ultimate manga-ka and the king of the manga world. Now despite my praise for the manga, I wasn't too thrilled on season 1. It was overly slow, had uneven pacing, filler that wasn't necessary, and too much of a focus on one of the manga's subplots in a way that almost shifted the tone of the story. The horrendous opening theme of the season didn't do it any favors either. They basically turned a fast paced shonen about following your dreams into a slow paced shojo at times. The season was good, but not particularly great.

Here we are with season 2 of the manga starting on the Trap arc, and almost instantly you can see improvements. The direction is always moving, the dialogue doesn't have as many awkward breaks, and the pacing finally manages to match up to the manga. What's more is the little filler used here is used to enhance the story and not to add padding to needless aspects. Even the voice actors seem more inspired and into it, and they were easily the highlight of the first season. Suffice to say, the premiere of season 2 is a marked improvement from season 1's affair and I for one am hoping the rest of the season matches up.

In this episode we meet new characters, learn new information about the world of manga, and Ashirogi Muto gets a new editor. If this sounds boring to you, then you definitely aren't acquainted with how Bakuman works. Ignore season 1 and jump in here, or better yet read the manga and catch up on the adaption starting with this.

9/10 – Desensitized

Hunter X Hunter (2011):

So, anyone who knows me knows that I'm a huge fan of Togashi's manga, from Yu Yu Hakusho and Level E to Hunter X Hunter. I especially love how good the adaptations of his anime have been, including the original HXH anime that started airing back in 1999. So, naturally when I heard that Mad House was doing a full on reboot starting from scratch, I had my doubts as to whether they could live up to the original anime adaptations, especially given their more inconsistent track record with their recent output over the last few years. After having seen their premiere episode of HXH....well, its only 1 episode so no, its not like it changed my mind, but I will say that it has given me some more hope that they know what they are doing with this renowned shonen title.

The general premise is about a boy named Gon Freecs who wants to follow in his in his father, world famous Hunter Ging Freecs's footsteps and become a licensed Hunter himself. A Hunter is a sort of licensed expert who is highly skilled in combat and various Hunter specialize in different fields from treasure hunting or discovering new species of exotic creatures to Blacklist Hunters who serve as bounty hunters of sorts. The plot itself has a very generic set-up on the outset, but anyone who is familiar with Togashi's unique and unconventional writing methods would know that his series are anything but generic. Togashi takes enough to tried and true shonen archetypes to set up a basic story, but everything else is his own spin on the genre and he isn't shy from taking this story through some downright dark turns that can quite frankly border on madness for what's supposed to be a children's story in Japan.

Of course, things in the series do start out on a light note and at least in this tone Mad House succeeds at capturing the feeling of wonder, mystery, and the sense of adventure that Togashi's story has about it. They also have one HUGE major advantage that almost no other shonen anime has the luxury of these days, and that's a HUGE wealth of source material. The manga for Hunter X Hunter is essentially over 300 chapters long at this point, and while its still going, Mad House starting from scratch gives them plenty of material to work with without having to resort to extended bouts of filler, and this premiere shows that they won't use any filler material unless its absolutely necessary. Essentially doing in 1 episode what took the original anime 3 episodes to cover, Hunter X Hunter (2011) manages to start things off at a quick and even pace. You get to see just enough of Gon's home village and get a sense of the world he grew up in before he departs into a much grander world outside of Whale Island, which is completely foreign to both him and the viewer. When you throw in some considerably high production values (relative to other series in this genre) and a pretty great soundtrack that may arguably be on par with the original anime, you get what could be the perfect set-up for another hit run for an already proven hit series. The question still lingers as to whether Mad House can deliver on Hunter X Hunter's endless potential, but if the first episode is any indication, they've certainly gotten off to a decent start. – Ensatsu-ken

Another day, another remake. Yes, you're reading this right, this is a remake of an anime from 1998 adapted from a manga by the creator of shonen classic Yu Yu Hakusho. But I won't be comparing the two here for a multitude of reasons, merely to tell you that this new adaption of Hunter X Hunter has so far started on the right foot. If you would like to get into this long running (and still running in Shonen Jump) series, this is probably the best shot you have and that isn't exactly a bad thing.

Everyone is aware that the one issue leveled at Hunter X Hunter is that it has pacing problems, especially in the early story. Right off the bat, this first episode condenses the first three episodes of the first anime into one package making the plot a lot easier to dive into for those who might not have the patience. Of course, there are aspects of the story left out (possibly for flashback material later), but unless you're a super fan, you probably won't notice there is anything missing and that might be for the best as the material, while important, works against the series in pacing at this early stage of the story.

As a fan, I could be a bit more critical, but I also realize that this is being made especially for those of us who have not experienced the story of Hunter X Hunter yet, and on that level it's a rousing success. If you have yet to dive into this epic shonen, now is most definitely the time to do so.

8/10 – Desensitized

C³

The first words in the show are “The smell of the soil, the smell of the iron, it smells like iron.” Just pointing that out there.

So random, boring kid gets a suspicious looking box that he can’t open. The box turns out to be a naked, albino girl who eats crackers in a cutesy manner likely to become jack-off material for paedophiles. Naked, albino girl then turns out to be an abusive bitch that has to be taught how to drink tea. While random, boring kid and his best friend/hypotenuse go to school, naked, albino girl puts on clothes (yet shows enough skin to make Mary Whitehouse’s head explode) and decides to go out on town. She then comes back and fails to clean up the house, just so the viewers can get some schadenfreude out of the annoying “Ha-hah, silly girl can’t do anything useful for her future boyfriend!” moments. Random, boring kid comes back and seethes with generic rage at how his house is a mess, yet he decides to have a bland tender moment with albino girl by the end of the episode.

Stock archetypes that were shoved in my eyes via a dozen other shows, a bland plot that has as much movement as a quadriplegic horse, and crappy animation which DEEN could probably outdo all makes for a rather dreadful experience. If it counts, the soundtrack was all right to listen to. But that would be like saying, “Oh, Alone In The Dark was a shit movie, but I liked to listen to the songs in it.”

I should also probably be concerned about the constant ass shots of a girl that looks like her age is on the clock, but at this point, it’s par for the course.

1/10 – Dr. Insomniac

Phi Brain – Kami no Puzzle

You know, I would probably like this show if the puzzles weren’t just simple Sudoku or maze games. The characters act as if finishing a crossword is some task that only Einstein can accomplish. A good show that involves these elements would have the viewers immerse themselves into seeing what’s the solution and how it can be resolved. But in here, the answers are told instead of shown, with the show essentially just trying to shove it in our faces how smart the main character is for finishing little sliding games instead of trying to get the audience to use their own mind to spot the clues. Really, the viewing experience was kind of like a bland Let’s Play.

And didn’t like how the puzzle at the climax was solved through a plot device instead of actual sleuthing.

That said, it definitely has tighter plotting in comparison to other stuff this season, and it doesn’t render you bored. And I enjoyed the soundtrack, which has a nice mix of salsa and some drums. Still, if you want puzzles, it’d probably be worth more of your time to play some Professor Layton instead of watching this.

5/10 – Dr. Insomniac

Kimi to Boku

You ever wondered what Ouran would be like without Haruhi? Well, here you go. I’m not even exaggerating, the cast has the tagalong kid, the logical guy with glasses, the twins, and all that’s missing is a Tamaki or a Mori to go along for the ride. What sucks even more is that it didn’t bother to rip off what made Ouran interesting or funny, it just took the characters and turned them into milquetoast. It also took out the ludicrousness, personality, plot, and art.
The character designer made the cast as bored and uncaring as the audience probably will be after the first few minutes. I can’t help but think the twins are trying to make a guy’s head explode with their mind. Seriously, whose idea was it to draw them like this, especially the audience surrogate who looks like a girl? He doesn’t just have naturally long hair; it’s fucking stripper-ready-to-be-housewife hair. What’s sad is that that’s the most distinctive thing he has among the cast.

This show is about absolutely nothing, at least K-On! had the goal to start a band. What does this have, high school clubs and awkward pillow talk? Yeah, that reminds me. At least a quarter of the episode is spent on a flashback where the guys bitch about sleeping in the middle of everyone else. Since this is a very common topic for boys to be talking about, it’s the closest we actually get to a plot this week. Argh.

Also, there are cats, which are probably there to remind the fangirls where they’re supposed to touch while ogling at the boys.

1/10 – Dr. Insomniac

Tamayura-Hitotose

Alright, before anything else I'll admit this much: I have a strong pre-conceived bias against the unofficially titled anime genre known as moe, and even any variations of that (basically anything with a focus on "cutesy" things, usually being young girls doing what are supposed to be cute things). To be fair, while this show has that appearance on the outset its not actually one of those shows. It does try to play off its characters as being cute, but to its credit it at least doesn't try to resort to any form of fan service (which you should be thankful for considering just how young the 2 main girls in this episode are) like too many other series sporting this type of look seem to love to do. The series instead tries to evoke an "uplifting" feeling from its viewers, which is an emotional response that is certainly very difficult to achieve.

To briefly explain the plot of this first episode: A young girl named Fu Sawatari is someone who was once quite bright and cheerful and loved photography which she was inspired to do by her father, who himself was a professional photographer. Due to certain circumstances he unfortunately passed away and Fu ended up losing her motivation to follow in his foot-steps due to the sad memories taking up his old camera (or any other for that matter) would bring to her. Her best friend Chihiro, a very sensitive girl who pretty much cries at the drop of a hat, also sympathizes with her but tries to support her through her tough times. Eventually upon seeing old photos of her family taken by her father which she had tried to burry away from herself to shun her old memories, she ends up remembering how cheerful she and her family used to be and realizes how much happiness photography brings to her. While it’s a hard decision for both her and Chihiro, she finally decides to move back to her old home town and possibly try and follow in her father's foot-steps like she always wanted to.

Now, what's here is honestly a good "concept" for a good set-up for a heartwarming story. Unfortunately, while the writers for this series had the concept down, they failed to deliver on the actual writing part for this particular series, and thus the set-up turns out extremely weak. The first problem is that we learn early on that Fu's father dies, but we learn nothing about his character or his interactions with Fu and the rest of her family except for the fact that he loved photography and seemed to be a pretty cheerful guy. So right away, there's no way that we as viewers can be expected to feel sorry for him, and he just becomes a mere figure of the past in this story. What about Fu, can we sympathize with her? Well, unfortunately the writers of this series make the common mistake of assuming that all it takes for viewers to sympathize with a character is for something tragic to have happened to them. I have seen countless cases in which characters in stories have troubled pasts with very close and influential loved ones of theirs having died, and while it may sound sinister I've grown a bit too desensitized to that. That is to say, just seeing that isn't enough to get my sympathy. I actually need to connect with the characters to feel bad, good, or any sort of emotion for them.

Fu isn't necessarily unlikeable, and her semi-depressed state in the 1st episode is certainly understandable, but her problem is that she's just far too bland as a character. I felt more like falling asleep listening to her talk and narrate the story in her monotone voice (it didn't even feel convincingly sad), rather than sorry for her. Her best friend Chihiro on the other hand is a complete mess of a character. I can't tell if the writers were trying to make her funny or seriously sympathetic when they decided to make one of her defining characteristics being too sensitive to the point of tears at anything even remotely sad, but her character doesn't work in either regard. She merely comes off as more of an annoyance than any proper support for Fu as her best friend, and once again, we have a character with no real personality to her aside from that one gimmick. Fu's mother and younger sibling get even less time and characterization in the episode so as far as I'm concerned they are just as 1-dimensional as the rest of the background.

To me, Tamayura-Hitotose's problem is that it’s just flat-out boring. It’s not offensive or disturbing like other cutesy series try to be, and it doesn't try to go the humorous route with this type of story either, and to be fair it doesn't feel like it was a completely effortless series to make (the art design is actually quite nice for the genre, and the animation is at least decent), but it gives the viewer absolutely nothing to be invested in or entertained by. While there are certainly much worse series' premieres out this season, it doesn't really excuse the extremely lackluster execution of a series like this, which essentially leaves no real reason for you to come back to this series after the first episode, unless you are REALLY into series with these sorts of character designs. So, yeah, if this series doesn't look like something that you would normally enjoy, that's because you won't enjoy it, so I really can't find any audience that I would actually recommend this to. – Ensatsu-ken

Persona 4: The Animation

Persona 4 is a very popular RPG in Japan due to its incredible sense of style and the unique world of Personas (magical beings powered from the soul) and social elements in it. Naturally, being one of Atlus' biggest games, they'd take it to anime. And that's exactly what you've got here. Since Persona 4 itself was made with many different anime staples in it, the transition to anime is almost unsettlingly natural. The premiere episode even opens with the same theme song the game opens with, and it doesn't even feel jarring at all.

The biggest issues come with the fact that it's pretty much ripped wholesale from the game. If you've played the game already, then you have very little to look forward to here as you'll most likely be seeing things you had already seen, including some of the main character's dialogue options from it. Speaking of the main character, I know him being a self-insert was the most probable way to keep it true to the games, but it doesn't really make him an interesting protagonist in the anime and it might grow to become a real problem down the line.

Basically, if you're a Persona fan, just play the game. If you have no intention of playing the game itself and want to watch something a bit different than the onslaught of moe shows this season, give this a shot. It might be for you.

7/10 – Desensitized

Mashiro-Iro Symphony

Alright, now this is just the type of show that easily perplexes me as to why it was even made? Actually, scratch that, these pointless "cutesy" shows must have some audience if they are popular enough to keep getting made in abundant quantities each and every new anime season. So then the real question becomes WHY do they even have an audience? Well, whatever the reason, I had to sit though an episode of this shit and believe me when I say that even doing that has become a huge chore in an of itself.

So the plot, or lack thereof, starts off with a boy (Boy A) and his younger sister (Girl A) who is lost. I would refer to these characters by their names but since they are too shallow to even establish any actual "characteristics" about them, I can't see them as characters and can't be bothered to remember or even care what the fuck they are called, so instead I will refer to the characters by gender and assigned letters based on the order that they appear. Apparently his sister gets lost easily so she calls him to come and pick her up. He asks her to text him a picture of her location so he can determine where she is (why he doesn't just ask her to read a nearby streeth sign or something is beyond me), in which case she takes a picture of herself making a cutesy smile (with some sign being obscured in the back corner) and her older brother fondly smiles at it and then notices her location, and tells her that he'll be there soon and informs her not to move.

Of course, what should be a simple enough task turns into a problem because Girl A finds a stupid cat-like thing that I suppose is supposed to seem cute and then does exactly what her brother told her not to do just 10 seconds ago (I'm not even exaggerating the time elapse here) and moves from her location to follow this random creature thing. I should point out that all that I was thinking about at this point would be how cool it was that the creature turned out to be some extraturrestrial alien life-form that takes on a cute appearance and then lures its annoying victims to dark corners to devour them as punishment for their incompetence, and thus a series of more interesting characters are brought into investigate such instances. Now that would be a fucking awesome series!....But, unfortunately this series is as boring and predictable as you'd expect and after a few moments Girl A realizes that she's lost (again) and calls her brother (again) informing him that she's more lost, describing that in her new location she sees a mountain (because, you know, something all the way in the background on the horizon is a brilliant location marker for someone who is probably less than a mile away and has the exact same fucking view as you of such large and distant objects).

After this Girl A's cell phone runs out of batteries (gee, maybe if she wasn't wasting time texting pointless pictures of herself and following some unidentified cat-like animal she could have avoided this problem), and then shortly after that it starts raining which worries Boy A (because....that's the most threatening and serious problem that a show like this can come up with....are you really surprised as this point?). Luckily for Girl A a passerby with an umbrella (Girl B) comes to her aid and allows her to use her cell phone to call her brother again. Then she gives the phone back to Girl B who has a pointless conversation with Boy A which I guess is supposed to start the set up for some sort of romantic relationship between them or some shit like that. After that he FINALLY finds them (and BTW, this stupid problem that could easily have been avoided takes up more than half of the episode, alone) and then the rain just suddenly stops, and he also has some more pointless dialogue with Girl B and apologizes for Girl A's stupidity (literally the only smart thing said in this entire episode, and probably this entire series by the time its done airing).

Later on Boy A is taking a bath and letting his wet clothes dry (despite the fact that he looked perfectly dry from head to toe, even when it was raining), and then his sister, Girl A steps into the bathroom and says that she will bathe with him and then he makes awkward faces and says that its unnatural but Girl A uses her monotone voice and says its just brother and sister bathing, and then he repeats that its unnatural putting on his awkward face again. I think the writers of this series consider this to be comedy or something....

So, to wrap things up it turns out that 90% of what happened in that episode has absolutely no relevance to the main plot. And yeah, apparently this show DOES have a main plot, but just what is that main plot?....Well, let's see: You find out that Boy A goes to an all boys school and Girl B goes to an all girls school and both of those schools happen to be doing some sort of exchange program for whatever reason. Boy A and his friend (Boy B) are both assigned to attend that school for the semester, and upon entering they find that all of the girls are dressed like maids. In my experiences in this genre this shit is pretty standard so I'm not even going to bother questioning it this time because its pointless either way? Anyways, the girl they meet (Girl C, I guess), leads them to the main hall where they are supposed to be welcomed by some student representatives and then Girl B stumbles out and both her and Boy A immediately recognize each other, but Girl B's kinder experession turns into one full of content and she exclaims that just because the schools approve of this exchange doesn't mean that the students do, and she says that she will not accept boys in the school, and then the episode ends.

Yeah, that's basically supposed to be the premire episode's attempt at a cliffhanger that will keep you coming back for more. Will Girl B come to accept Boy A and other boys attending this school? But the real question should be: Do you really give a shit?

So, yeah, fuck this show. – Ensatsu-ken

Mobile Suit Gundam AGE

Another season passes, and it's time for the legendary Gundam series to make its reappearance! Gundam has been a bit shaky in recent years (aside from the extremely well received Unicorn OVA), but Gundam AGE has billed itself as sort of a new start of sorts.... Again. I mean, it's not like we haven't been told this before with Gundam Seed or even way back when G Gundam aired, but this time the aim really is a bit different.

This time instead of going for a more modern approach like Seed or hot blooded shonen craziness with G, they decided to aim for the kids with this one. Essentially imagine Beyblade or Bakugan or similar shows only with their respective battle gimmicks replaced with Gundam battles and you'll be pretty close. I can understand their reasoning for making this show, the problem is that there is really nothing here for either Gundam fans that they haven't seen before, or sci-fi/action fans as it does little they also haven't also seen a million times. In other words, they turned Gundam -the seminal mecha series, into a generic giant mech show giving it pretty much no flavor whatsoever.

Basically, if you're looking for new Gundam, check out Unicorn which is probably what you want out of the franchise. But on the flip side, if you have kids or younger siblings, then this might be a good entry title.

5/10 – Desensitized

Mirai Nikki

The almighty god of time and space, otherwise known as Norio Wakamoto, bestows upon an antisocial kid the power to predict the future with his cell phone. Initially using it for trivial matters like scoring on tests or avoiding bullies, he stumbles upon a plot to kill him in order to ascend godhood. On top of this, he gets a psycho girlfriend to boot. Ladies and gentlemen, FML: The Anime.

In a change of pace, I actually liked a first episode. Sure, it plods and only gets good around the second half, but compared to the rest of the season, that makes it a success. The plot and setting feels very akin to Death Note and Eden of the East, with the main character definitely an apple’s throw away from the Shinji Ikari archetype. The idea of a kid having to play chessmaster with predictions in order to save his own ass surely shows great potential. And while I already knew her reputation through visiting the odd site or two, Yuno had a unique flair to her. There are a few times where she makes Rena or Mion look sane. I would definitely make sure to watch this show, or at least read the manga.

It could’ve done without some of the Deus Ex Machina parts though. They felt more like exposition moments instead of elements that could have moved and opened the plot for viewers.

7/10 – Dr. Insomniac

Guilty Crown

Some high school kid laments on how he has to reside in a pseudo-futuristic Japan; ruled with an iron fist by its international overlords. But on one day, he finds a mysterious girl in odd wear that must be rescued from the aforementioned iron fist and its evil, one-note army. As these men decide to destroy a city with their mechs and kill bystanders for shits and giggles, the girl offers the kid a superpower, symbolized with a mark on his body, which gives him the ability to slaughter his foes without breaking a sweat. With these powers in hand, our protagonist has started the surge against totalitarianism with him and a bunch of resistance fighters.

No, this isn’t Code Geass. It really isn’t. See, the girl on this show has pink hair instead of green hair. That makes it absolutely different.

Oh, who am I kidding? This show is derivative and pandering as all hell. The lead looks like the one from High School of the Dead, who looks like the one from Busou Renkin. It all starts with a song whose purpose is to get fanboys into buying the OST. We get a half-naked, high-pitched girl sure to have her image printed on dozens of body pillows. Everything about this show is calculated to get the most sales and attention, not to see how far it can go in terms of quality.

And since it decided to copy Code Geass, it also decided to rip off its antagonists wholesale with trigger-happy bastards that we’re expected to hiss at. If you’re going to have sociopathic soldiers that will unanimously kill civilians with absolutely no motive behind the attack other than mere orders and generic bloodlust, then why not just have robots with elementary AI as the henchmen? Having them commit atrocities just so we know to side with the protagonists just speaks poorly for both sides. So I’m supposed to sympathize with the main cast because they don’t shoot innocent people, not due to their attributes or personalities?

Even if the villains have to be unlikable bastards, at least make them interesting beyond “generic Reich knockoff”. Give them a face, a name, a personality, and some charm like Gauron and Ladd Russo. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe I’m ranting about it too much, but I just think it hurts a show like this if the antagonists end up being poorly thought-out bastards for the sake of being poorly thought-out bastards.

That said, the protagonist certainly isn’t a Lelouch clone, and not seeing a Kallen knockoff anywhere around, so the show could possibly branch out from being a copy in favor of being something better. And the striking direction and vibrant soundtrack prove that to be quite possible. It’s just the first impression of this show is disappointing at best, scoff-worthy at worst.

So TL;DR: Superb production values, crappy story.

4/10 – Dr. Insomniac

Un-Go

Seto Kaiba and a creepy tranny dressed as a panda are out to solve mysteries. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the show.

Rather odd to see an episodic anime in a time where even the most trite shows have vague plotlines going on throughout. And while it’s welcoming, it also leaves the series with little impact to offer. The sleuth-solving this episode just seemed to finish before I could actually get involved in it. Nothing from the episode grated me in anyway, but neither did any of it excite me. It did confuse me though (the tranny turning into a sultry woman that reads minds through butterfly-vision, what?). But that doesn’t mean it was mediocre.

I mean, if you like a good mystery story and have been sick of Detective Conan never ending, here’s an alternative. The animation doesn’t seem like BONES’s style, but not in a bad way. The characters, aside from the tranny of course, naturally develop while not coming off as bland. And the direction was all right. For those wanting an anime that tries not to insult your intelligence,

7/10 – Dr. Insomniac

Ben-To:

Normally I'd got into a good amount of detail about the plot of a show before I get down to my thoughts about it. However Ben-To is one of those intentionally ludicrous anime that go to bizarre levels to play out for laughs. As far as story goes in this first episode, it basically just revolves around Yō Satō, a high school student who wakes up in the middle of a grocery store to find that he has been beaten unconcious and can't remember how it happened. One of those annoying girls that you see in other anime of this sort (the hyper-active ones who never shut the fuck up) tags along with him for some reason. Nothing of any signficance really happens until he later finds out that he got beat up by some blue-haired girl (one again, I couldn't be bothered to remember any actual names in this anime besides the main character's, but hey, even that's something coming from me) and presumably various other consumers at the store fighting over half-price ben-to (basically a pre-packaged meal). And....yeah, that's your plot. Well, there is some crap about him joining some club that the girl is in that I guess has to do with fighting over half-priced ben-to, but its obvious that taking the story seriously in a show like this is irrelivant since its primarily about getting laughs out of its viewers.

Alright, so we have a silly show with over-the-top action and gags and predictably quirky characters. Having to judge it as a comedy, I have to be fair and try to level with it since I understand that comedy is an extremely subjective thing, and I have to admit that I'm REALLY not into these over-the-top nonsensical comedy anime, especially since most of them in recent years have just disguised themselves under that sort of concept when really they just rely on a sleuth of unfunny perverted sexual-themed gags. To be honest I was expecting something similar from this but to its credit it doesn't rely on these things very much at all for its jokes (this is of course, only going by the first episode). Instead, to my surprise, we do actually get what looks to be some genuine effort into making a wacky show that actually comes off as so ridiculous its funny and entertaining, but the question then becomes whether or not it succeeds at doing this.

Well, like I said, comedy being as subjective as it is, I can't really speak for anyone but myself in this case. I will actually admit to having chuckled maybe 1 or 2 times through the course of this episode (which, once again, is intself saying a lot coming from me in regards to this sort of show), though I get an odd feeling that one of those times was unintentionally funny for me. As for the episode at a whole, the best thing I can really say about it is that it never sunk to any extreme lows that made me want to stop watching immediately, but at the same time it failed to keep me engaged in its humor, so I didn't really feel compelled to keep watching either. Its not that I don't "get" the jokes, as there isn't a whole lot to get, but rather I just find them to be too tame or predictable for my liking, which is not a good sign for a series with a set-up as ridiculous as this one. The characters aren't so badly designed like in other series of this type that it makes me want to gag, but at the same time they don't come off as being all that silly either (once again, relative to how ludicrous the set-up is).

I must confess that I don't watch a lot of shows of this type in the first place due to my general distaste for the genre (the closest thing to it that I've completely seen is Excel Saga, and that's almost nothing like this show, so it makes for a bad comparison), so I don't even have a good basis to compare it to. If I were to recommend it to anyone, I suppose anyone who actually is a fan of anime comedies with silly plots and characters would be entertained by this, so in that regard its at least worth a shot for that audience, and to its credit it seems to be doing a fine job already of entertaining people with such tastes. However, while its certainly a good deal more entertaining than its piers in this genre, anyone who does not taking a liking to these sorts of comedies most likely won't find too much here that will keep them interested, even if it is far more tolerable than many other recent series of this type. – Ensatsu-ken

To Have Learned and Lost From the Rabbit and His Rhapsodies by Dr. Insomniac

2011-09-29T22:15:00.004-04:00

You know those teenagers on the internet who constantly boast about how awesome their lives were as a kid, how grade school and Saturday mornings were their milk and honey? I’m not one of them. My childhood sucked. And yet, whenever my dad hit me just for playing with my Megazords a little too much, or those times when my caretaker at daycare told me I was worthless for not knowing the alphabet in the right order, there was always one solace: Looney Tunes.

Beyond Rugrats, Doug, Ren & Stimpy, and the like, I remember sitting in front of the TV with steadfast attention whenever I heard “The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down” or “Merrily We Roll Along” start up. From seeing Marc Anthony cry over having apparently killed that kitten, to watching Henery Hawk torment the hell out of Foghorn, I relished every short and every viewing. And not just due to the jokes or the timelessness, it was the message.

When you get down to it, Looney Tunes has essentially replaced Aesop’s Fables or Grimm’s Fairy Tales as little stories that kids have ingrained in their mind. And instead of giving lessons like “slow but steady wins the race” or “listen to your parents or an evil gypsy with a chicken-house will kill you”, these cartoons laid down the basic idea of how you shouldn’t let brute force and humorless cynicism get the better of you. And such a theme couldn’t be showcased better than in how Bugs bested overzealous hunters, savage gunmen, uncaring planet-destroyers, and a certain, conniving duck.

And contrary to that last word, my favorite short Nasty Quacks perfectly illustrates what I’m talking about by showing Daffy Duck giving his all to make sure some fat; sour-ass sod won’t kick him out of his house. We get to see manipulative pessimism get countered and trampled over by wit, zaniness, and a bit of romance at the end. And combined with some potshots at neglectful parenting, it turned out to be a perfect seven minutes that any kid who didn’t see eye-to-eye with their providers could relate to.

In short, Daffy, Bugs, Porky, Speedy, and the rest helped teach me that I wasn’t alone and that being a little looney could indeed triumph over the morose and forlorn… and then I grew up with an interest in reconnecting to those characters by going to news sites, forums, threads, and the like. It was the equivalent of walking into a mall bathroom during Christmas and finding Santa sodomizing a toddler.

These childhood heroes of mine were mutated into tools for people to judge, to look down upon, and to delude themselves into some sort of faux-elitism. Instead of understanding the fun and charm of these shorts, some have turned it into an overly organized, obsessive, and exclusionist hobby. If you were a kid that didn’t have time to watch LT, or just preferred to watch something that dared to be made after the Eisenhower era, you were viewed as filth in the eyes of the fanboys. And may woe fall upon you for even suggesting to them that you like cartoons made in countries that don’t speak English. Instead of just enjoying the view, they instead compel themselves to collect anything related to Freleng, Jones, Tashlin, and et cetera and stuff it where no one but them will be able to appreciate it. And whenever someone wishes to continue the LT spirit, they get into an utter tizzy and proclaim damnation upon every single detail. Sure, there’s an exception, but only about as rare as treasure in a landfill.

Enraged is not a word that should be used, since that just means stooping to their level. Instead, I would prefer distraught. Distraught over how these bohemian figures I’ve loved as a child have become symbols for the very people they were mocking. It made one sad to go to a LT-based board and finding nothing but spite and unpleasantness, as well as finding people I wanted to talk to about these cartoons ending up being the most humorless jackasses one could ever meet. I can’t even call it ironic, since that would imply humor could be drawn from the situation.

Through a failure to see eye-to-eye, I ended up putting away these childish things and have seldom watched the shorts since future viewings will do nothing but remind me of the kind of people that enjoy them. Even if I do block it out, nothing can really help the fact that acclaim and wonder aside, these are just old cartoons I’ve already seen several times over, and therefore ends up being a tad hard to get excited over used goods. And yet, despite the joy having been lost, I still remember what those endless Merrie Melodies viewings taught me. No matter how much you’re down, no matter what kind of shit people throw at you, you’ll always have an ace up your sleeve.

And I cannot stress any further my respect towards Looney Tunes for teaching me that.

State of the Channel: Cartoon Network

2011-09-05T13:59:00.000-04:00

I’m not gonna lie and say that I remember the exact date that Toonami went off the air in America. On the contrary, it’s all a blur to me—I remember I was in high school, and I remember finding out somehow that that night would be Toonami’s last airing (Pacific timer, so I probably found out from someone online, or a commercial, or something) and not really feeling that much more past that. In general, I watched the action block for the anime and skipped out on any Cartoon Network originals (Teen Titans was in its final season, and I think we’ve all reached a general consensus on how that season was), but at the least I figured I’d park it that night in front of the TV and watch everything go down.

And so it happened. A random episode of Samurai Jack was the last to play before TOM and his new little sidekicks literally said their final goodbyes and referenced Bebop before the parental warning showed up for the [adult swim] block.

Checking Wikipedia, it looks like it’s been a good 3 years this month since then, so I figured a “State of the Channel” sort of post seems in order.

Let me further postpone getting to the guts of this post by saying that a good number of people will argue that Nickelodeon’s early broadcasting format was seen as one of the better ones it’s had—a healthy balance of pretty much every genre kids and preteens would be interested in, from game shows like Double Dare and Legends of the Hidden Temple, to live action shows like Hey Dude and Salute Your Shorts, to their Nicktoons of varying levels of insanity. Three years after what was arguably their most popular programming block was cancelled, Cartoon Network seems to follow suit, with a wide variety of game shows, live action shows, and off-the-wall-type original cartoons. And yet for some reason, it hasn’t received similar amounts of praise. This can be explained in one of two ways: nostalgia glasses making anything old better than anything new, and well... the fact that the channel itself is called Cartoon Network, thus making any and all signs of live action anything serving as the equivalent of spitting in the viewers’ faces.

But regardless of the drama following Toonami’s cancellation, it seems like CN has gotten past any fan backlash and has been able to follow up with their promise of original-to-the-network shows—cartoons included. You’ve got the hipster-popular Adventure Time, the awkward-because-it’s-not-Animaniacs MAD, the awkward-because-it’s-not-The-Office Looney Tunes Show, the underappreciated-because-it’s-not-Adventure-Time Regular Show, and the surprisingly-good-because-it’s-quirky The Amazing World of Gumball... nothing spectacular, but nothing too bad.

Following the death of Toonami was word that the previous change in the network’s head from Jim Samples to Stuart Snyder would lead to an “anti-anime” movement throughout the channel as a whole, explaining Toonami’s fate as well as the treatment of popular Japanese titles such as Yu Yu Hakusho being shafted to a 5AM time slot. Regardless of the shift in presidents, however, it seems like anime are doing okay enough, forming a good majority of the [adult swim] block with newer (granted, not as new as some fans would want) titles such as Bleach, FMA: Brotherhood, and Durarara!! airing alongside the old reliable anime series Cowboy Bebop.

But what seems to be the most significant change so far has to be the channel’s treatment of action series. While I haven’t been the closest of viewers over the past three years (it’s weird to find that my big 3 channels have become AMC, Travel Channel and Bio), I will say that I’ve seen enough on CN to notice that focus during the day has primarily gone to its original comedy shows, giving minimum commercial time for things like Star Wars: Clone Wars, Young Justice, Generator Rex and the like, which is a real shame. I remember a time in Cartoon Network’s history where commercials combining all their shows into one “universe” of sorts existed; a world where each show existed and interacted with each other in a strange harmony of sorts.

Today, I’m lucky if I’m able to find out when the next Young Justice or Mystery Inc. airs without having to resort to an online search.

So in some ways, I guess you can say that some fan doomsday predictions came true, what with a change in power leading to a change in focus for the channel. Then I think, “What would Toonami’s Optimus Prime host say?”

Like all crappy things, time will heal all wounds. And hopefully, by the time the scar left from the removal of Toonami fades, we’ll have a Cartoon Network that old school and new school alike will be proud of.

Infinite Stratos -- Infinitely Awful Part 2 by Kiddington

2011-09-02T12:04:00.001-04:00

Episode 2: Class-Representative Selection Match

For the record, I'm not actually expecting this show to be... well, 'ya know, good, at any point during the course of its 12-episode run. Going into a series that I was already told beforehand would suck, I'm naturally expecting the worst of the worst at the turn of every frame. That said, I am, however, expecting the 11 remaining episodes to not be as dreadfully boring as the first. After all, this is supposed to be an action series (or, at least, a softcore titty hentai series with underlying action elements). Does Episode 2 deliver? Let's fiiiiind out!

...aaaaand in this corner, it's the Badass Brit clad in Bluuuuueeeee!

Revelation time! As it would happen, the school seems to have "run out" of extra stock IS suits, so to compensate, the Japanese government will apparently be providing our boy Ich with his very own "personal" IS. Oh joy! The difference between the two suit models (stock and personal) is never truly elaborated upon, but I digress. Resident braggart Cecilia Alcott then struts onto the scene, largely regurgitating a number of things we already knew from Episode 1; that she's awesome, that she's British, and that she's one badass motherfucker when she's piloting an IS. Yawn. In the midst of all this shameless ego boosting, we do get another sprinkling of IS history and universal folklore; apparently, only 467 of these things exist WORLDWIDE, which is, of course, a staggering ratio in contrast to the human population of over six billion. Only the elite of the elite are privileged enough to have their very own, as she so candidly puts it. I dunno; if I were her, I'd think the fact that a dunderhead like Ichika is getting HIS own suit, which essentially puts him in the same upper echelon that she's supposedly in, would kinda take the starch out of the whole thing... but again, I digress.

More IS history ensues, courtesy of Miss Yamada. Most of it comes down to boring, technical aspects of how an IS operates, 99.9% of which Ichika does not understand whatsoever. For apparently being able to operate one of these things himself, he sure is dense. One other tidbit of information also slips, in that Houki Shinonono (Ich's roomie, remember?) is apparently related to THE person who builds IS suits in this very day and age, a Dr. Tabane Shinonono. I don't know what ass they are randomly pulling this stuff out of, but I seem to recall it being said in Episode 1 that these things are manufactured by government entities for space travel (which later reverts to Olympic sport after that endeavor fails). I guess after the whole space thing failed, they harbored off the technology to outside minds. Or something; I don't know, and I don't even care. I suppose it's just a convenience factor for them to invent characters on the fly, and making Houki fairly knowledgeable in how an IS operates does help to further along her relationship with Ichika (you'll see why this is important shortly). I shouldn't be surprised.

It is around this time that we are also treated to what might possibly be the worst scene in the entire episode. Oh, who am I kidding; it IS the worst scene. It's not important, but I'm going to mention it anyway, because it pissed me off THAT much. Yep, you guessed it; comic relief gone horribly, horribly wrong. Random Girl #22A in class asks ol' Yamsy if thinking of an IS suit as a "partner" is the same as thinking of it as a boyfriend, or something idiotic like that (because Yamada told the class to think of the IS as a partner, as opposed to "just a tool"). It is then implied that Yamada is, in fact, a virgin (and with hooters THAT size; who knew?), and the girls in class all squeal, call her cute, make dumb jokes, giggle uncontrollably... and I die a little inside. So far, this show tends to be more boring than bad, but other times, it's just an absolutely pitiful excuse for entertainment.

Ichika has his sights on Houki shortly afterward, who sits alone with her thoughts. He invites her to eat lunch with him, which she coldly declines. He also invites a bunch of other girls, who do just the opposite. THOSE girls aren't what he's interested in, though, and his persistence in getting Houki to join in the merriment costs him a swift punch to the ground, and plenty of humble pie to go around for having his ass handed to him by a girl. She's a bit taken back at how much weaker he's apparently become (the two were in the same Kendo class, if you remember), but that doesn't stop him from trying to get her to join him. Ich then grabs her by the hand, and actually drags her down to the lunchroom with him... and she DOESN'T resist this time! Not only that (and this next part really gets me), but as he's holding her hand, the faint signs of Houki falling for our absent-minded hero are written all over her face. I still don't know how she suddenly goes from decking him to the floor, to being slightly turned on by such a simple gesture, but whatever. It's a show about people flying around in robot suits; it's not supposed to make sense.

Lunch is rather boring, so we'll skip that. If you must know, the only major event of remote importance here is that Houki offers to teach Ichika how to properly operate an IS, as he frets over his impending match with Cecilia. This doesn't actually happen, mind you; Houki instead proceeds to kick Ichika's ass at Kendo for about a week or so, insisting that he isn't strong enough to operate an IS in his current state. When the actual suit is doing the bulk of the fighting FOR you, one wonders exactly why any of these measures of physical strength are considered important, but I've learned by now that asking questions only leads to more questions. It's best to just assume that every character OTHER than Ichika is right; he is an idiot, after all.

Nowwwwwwwwww we're getting somewhere, and it only took 14 grueling minutes! Ichika's personal IS battle suit has finally arrived, and in spite of learning a whole lot of nothing on how to actually operate it, he's ready anyway. The fight is about to begin; with Yamada and Chifuyu manning the control the tower, and Cecilia awaiting outside, Ich blasts off, as the ass-kicking of a lifetime surely awaits him. Cecilia offers him one final out-clause, saying that if he apologizes and forfeits the match, she won't annihilate him. Ichika rebuffs her proposal, and the fight is underway. Cue lasers!

Ooooohooooo, that's gotta hurt, Gene!

It's pretty much back and forth action here. Actually, scratch that; it's pretty much "Cecilia fires a bunch of lasers at Ichika, and he runs away several times" here. Yeah, that's more like it. For being totally dense as to how an IS operates, though, Ich can and does maneuver out there quite nicely. Guess he really DOES have some past experience in piloting these things; honestly, for a while there, I was starting to think it was all BS. Even Cecilia is, surprisingly enough, in awe at how well he's holding up.

Deciding to finally go on the offensive after she's blasted him for the 3rd or 4th time, Ich draws out a new weapon, a "laser sword" of sorts (it's the official IS lightsaber! Yeah!), and locks on his target. After making a slightly ridiculous, yet also noble, speech about how he's going to start "protecting his badass, Olympic IS champion sister" or something like that, he makes his move. Just as he's about to lay the death blow into Cecilia with his lightsaber, the buzzer sounds. Ich has just lost the match; apparently, that latest maneuver drained his suit of all of its "shield energy", and the ironclad rules of IS clearly state that when a contestants shield energy runs dry, the match is over, and they automatically lose. Yamada and Chifuyu break down the situation during the next scene with excruciating detail... but I'm really not in the mood to get into specifics. Basically, long story short, Ich made the mistake of using something called the "Barrier-Disabling Attack", which drained all of his shield energy. For whatever reason, this is a no-go in IS battle... and thus, Ich loses, and Cecilia wins. Sadface.

FINAL SCENE. Houki was impressed with Ichika's battle skills, and as she continues to think about their recent "hand connection" earlier in the episode, she slowly begins to fall for him more and more (whilst also FINALLY agreeing to properly teach him the in's and out's of using an IS). Meanwhile, Cecilia Alcott, rather than reveling in her latest victory, is feeling totally the opposite of what one might expect from her character. Instead of gloating in her typical fashion, she finds herself alone, in the shower... THINKING ABOUT ICHIKA?!?! Say whaaaaaaaaaa? The look on her face says it all; it is strongly implied that Cecilia now has romantic feelings for Ich. Seriously. In the span of ONE episode, Ichika goes from universally reviled from two of the shows central characters, to some kind of secret love interest to the both of them, ala Helga Pataki to Arnold or some sort. As Bill O'Reilly once said, "You Can't Explain That".

...aaaaand, that's all she wrote. We now close the book on Episode 2. I'll give kudos where credit is due; it was better than Episode 1, I'll say that much. That doesn't exactly mean it's worth watching, though, and I'm still expecting an all downhill ride from here (this is, after all, a harem show... and yet the harem aspects were surprisingly subdued this time, which I am obviously not expecting in future outings). Just be glad I'm the one watching this, and you aren't. Oh, the things I do for you people...

Ludovico Trials: Kicking Clannad in the Nads (Part 8) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-08-31T23:19:00.003-04:00

Episode 8: The Cohesion that Vanishes Into the Twilight

After being told by Sunohara that more and more people are forgetting Fuko, Tomoya is having an introvert moment before Nagisa and Fuko snap him out of it by confirming that the wedding will be next Sunday. So yay, everything’s happy for almost five seconds.

We proceed to get more footage of Fuko trying to hand out starfish. However, people are just ignoring this little green girl and her promise of graven idols. After telling us what we just saw a second ago, Nagisa also begins to wonder why people are treating Fuko like she isn’t there. Tomoya’s reluctant to tell the two the bitter truth that she’s probably dead, because lies are kawaii. A wild Tomoyo appears, and it turns out that she can’t remember the starfish she got. Wait, how do people forget physical objects? It’s not like the starfish are ectoplasmic.

In the midst of sitting outside, the three worry about how they can hand out all the starfish in time. Nagisa tries to console Fuko, who orgasms upon the mere touch. And we just had random yuri a few episodes ago. How many actual lesbians think that Nagisa’s hot?

After happy time is over, Fuko confuses Tomoya for a paedophile and cowers to the back of Nagisa. When being told that he’s the perpetrator behind those pranks all those episodes ago, Fuko decides to call Tomoya the “mini-worst”, the mini’s because she doesn’t want to be too hard on Tomoya. Tomoya deceives Fuko to replace “mini” with “I am the”, tricking Fuko again with this preschool mischief.

Glasses girl walks around, and they notice that she can’t remember getting a starfish or seeing Fuko either. Seriously, why can’t Fuko run into her or something to see if she’s really a ghost? Stop moping about what’s happening and do something about it. But of course, the characters decide to do the least opportune action and just cry about it.

Honestly, how is this supposed to make sense? It’s not like if someone normally dies, we automatically lose our memories of them. Jun Maeda, why do you not explain your magic rules instead of using a trope right out of Quesada’s rulebook?

At the Furukawa’s, everyone’s making starfish even though we just saw them having more a bag full of these forsaken objects. Instead of trying to do something like write down Fuko’s name and stuff so they can remember her, Nagisa cries at how her parents are having a good time with Fuko. And since this show keeps excelling in repetitive hijinks, Mr. Furukawa becomes manic, starts yelling nonsensically, and proceeds to stab himself in the foot. Nagisa helps a customer, and then cries again over how they might one day forget Fuko. Personally, I’d consider that a blessing, but we all have our weak moments. Don’t we?

Tomoya goes to the dorm, and sees Sagara attacking a bunch of guys for being picky about food. After getting frustrated, our humble protagonist just tells her to hit them more so they can be quiet, because nothing says authoritative like a good half nelson. Warped morals, everyone! He then hands her a starfish, and proceeds to Sunohara’s room. After laughing at a sports manga, Sunohara seriouses the fuck up and talks about how he skipped some of his non-existent classes in order to do research on Fuko. Dear blondie deduces that Fuko is Fuko Ibuki purely on the basis that she’s handing out invitations for Ms. Ibuki’s wedding. By this logic, he decides that this Fuko is an imposter because Fuko Ibuki is at the hospital. Because really, it’s rare enough for one pair of parents to be so spiteful as to name their kid “Fuko”. It’s downright unbelievable for two pairs to commit such a travesty towards their offspring!

Sunohara wants to go to the hospital to verify her appearance, but Tomoya refuses for him to do it, because he assumes that he’ll automatically forget Fuko. Uh… where is the evidence that such an event will happen? And it’s not like Sunohara’s been a close friend to our little green-haired girl throughout this show, so it wouldn’t be a big loss if he forgot her. Why the Hell has Sunohara become the rational one in this episode?

The morning after, even the paedophiles have forgotten Fuko. Wait, then how would they explain all that starfish merchandise they made? Sunohara stumbles by, and automatically proves Tomoya’s theory right and forgets the reason for why he was going to the hospital. Argh. The three try to get him to remember, but the bitch and the doormat quickly derail the situation. It turns out Kyou and Ryou are also confused about the starfishes, no matter how much Tomoya tries to poorly explain it to them.

Why aren’t they noticing that Nagisa’s holding something in her arms?

Tomoya makes the resounding conclusion that the forgetfulness started with those who didn’t know her well, and shall soon spread to those who loved her. Nagisa also makes a genius deduction about how one she’ll forget Fuko, she won’t be friends with her anymore! Because how can you have a friend you don’t remember? It’s quite logical and precise, there must be laws written about it!

And here! The show has given you horrible people a brief taste of lesbian loli bathtime. Enjoy it, you bastards!

Fuko keeps failing to give people starfish. Why can’t you just throw at them and see if they notice? But of course, that’s not the Clannad way. Sunohara comes back, and starts getting non-existent-cock-blocked by Tomoya when he starts uttering Fuko’s name. However, he doesn’t know why. This show isn’t being consistent on which people are remembering things, damn it.

So Sunohara can see the starfish once it touches his hands. Are the starfish invisible until people touch it? What?

Realizing that Fuko’s only been wearing one set of clothes for this entire arc, they decide to buy her something. Not being able to find proper clothing, they buy her a party hat.

Tomoya complains on how Fuko still doesn’t like him, which she denies by saying, “I like you better than a sea slug.” Wow. You’ve managed to make even Osaka have better taste than you. Getting depressed over how he’s between sea slugs and starfish, Tomoya visualizes himself in salsa clothes, because that’s what all upstanding Japanese students wish they could wear.

Nagisa calls him a warm person, leading him to leave because he can’t admit his goddamn feelings in this show. Then, they walk by a fountain and smile at it like toddlers. The end.

Oh, there’s a few minutes left to show some more angst. Goddamn it.

They go back to the bakery, where Mr. Furukawa takes a baseball bat and does his best Captain Falcon impression. And sadly (or thankfully), even he doesn’t remember Fuko. Mrs. Furukawa comes by, only to look the wrong way and start crying. Also, it turns out, nobody fell for Fuko’s charade and immediately found out that she was an Ibuki. Yeah, if you haven’t been noticing, our three main characters are dumbasses like that.

She can manage to touch Fuko even though she can’t see her, so why can’t they do it for anybody else? But instead of actually doing something, they just cry again. And after all that, they go to school because Fuko has nowhere else to go, the end… the hell kind of cliffhanger is that?

Avaitor Picks the Top 11 Nicktoon Episodes- Or So He Thinks

2011-08-17T22:18:00.004-04:00

Last Thursday, the Nicktoons turned 20. We had a plan to celebrate this and everything, but our series seemed to have fell threw. But the interest was still there, and after watching the Nostalgia Critic's Top 11 B:TAS Episodes list, I decided to take a crack at something different myself. I picked eleven memorable episodes from eleven memorable Nicktoons and put them up in this list. There's no ranking here, and each show is put here in broadcast order. I also decided to only go with episodes that fill up a half-hour. No multi-parters or 11-minute shorts or anything.

I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed putting everything together.

Doug- “Doug’s Christmas Story”

Who doesn’t remember this classic? Even in the Disney version’s Christmas episode, Skeeter and his family can be caught watching it together.

While ice-skating, Porkchop save Bebe Bluff from slipping in thin ice, but bruises her leg in the process. This “outburst” alerts her rich daddy, causing Porkchop to go to the highest security room in the local kennel while he awaits his possible trial. Now all Doug wants for Christmas is for his dog to be out safe, and tires to save him in the process.

While it’s never directly mentioned that Porkchop would be put to sleep, there’s still a lot of tension as Doug attempts to get the city of Bluffington to save his dog. While it’s a little light in humor, the heart and relatable peril make up for that. And let’s be honest- Doug was never really a laugh riot to begin with. There are some good jokes here, though, like Doug and Judy’s plan to give their dad a more satisfactory 9 iron.

Doug is about a down-to-earth kid facing issues we can relate to at his age, and handles them with his warped imagination and perplexing actions. Out of all the episodes of the series, this one tends to get a response from audiences more than most, and it really is one of the show’s best moments.

Rugrats- “Mother’s Day”

One of the specials made before the show’s first post-revival season started off, this episode of Nick’s flagship show of the 90’s had it all. Some really funny moments and the show at its most heart-wrenching. This episode is hard not to like, even if you’re not a fan of the show.

The babies discover what mother’s Day is when Angelica tells them, and they try to find gifts for their mommies. Except for Chuckie, who doesn’t have one. The babies try to make up for that, and find him a new mommy, with disaster results. Meanwhile, Chaz tries to hide his collection of remains from Chuckie’s mother, hoping that he doesn’t find it and start to miss her.

This episode is special for two reasons, the one that most people remember being the discovery of Chuckie’s mother. While we never learn exactly how she dies (we’re told that she was in the hospital, long enough to write some journal entries no less, but that’s it), we finally get to see what she looks like, discover what she was like, and get an idea of what her relationship with Chuckie and Chaz was like before passing on.

The other factor that isn’t as well acknowledged is when Angelica takes on being Chuckie’s mother. Charlotte’s neglectful treatment towards her daughter is apparent when Angelica tries becoming a mommy and almost completely disregards Chuckie. While I doubt Charlotte is as cruel as Angelica can be to the babies in this episode, but the seems are there early on in the episode, and everything starts to be put in place near the end when Angelica cries when giving her mom her inadequate Mother’s Day gift. One of the few times we see Angelica as vulnerable as she is here.

A little sappy, yes, but Rugrats could occasionally pull off sappy moments like this, and the movies aside, you’d be hard-pressed to find it pull off more touching moments like the whole of this episode after it’s release. This is possibly the show at it’s best.

The Ren & Stimpy Show- “Sven Hoek”

Jesus. This episode. Just…

Ren get tired of Stimpy’s inanity (no, I didn’t mean to say insanity), and invites his “intellectual” cousin Sven over to their house. The only problem? Ren hasn’t seen Sven in years, and is shocked to find him o be a big, fat goofball like his best friend. Sven and Stimpy connect, and make jackasses of themselves. At the end, Ren is not happy. Not. One. Bit.

This contains the show at it’s sickest, it’s most vile, it’s most disturbing. “Sven Hoek” is a test of endurance for viewers to see how much they can handle. Plenty of gross-out jokes made throughout, some going beyond funny and being just plain nasty. Hell, the dumbbell’s favorite game is called “Don’t Whiz on the Electric Fence”, and guess what Ren does at the end.

Speaking of the ending, Ren gives a speech that borderlines on horrifying. If you can, find the unedited version of it, since Nickelodeon cut out a section of it that adds to the whole thing. All I’ll say is that Ren could use some TP at that point, and you might feel uncomfortable at this point of the episode. But it’s worth watching for John K’s performance as Ren. His voice is pitch perfect, and the animation is sharply detailed during his breakthrough. Spumco at their finest.

“Sven Hoek” is not for everyone, but hell, neither is Ren & Stimpy. This is one of the show’s defining moments, even if Nick won’t allow it to broadcast anymore.

Rocko’s Modern Life- “Wacky Delly”

Best episode ever? Or best episode ever?

It seems like everybody’s hard their say on this episode, so I’ll keep it a little brief. Cartoonist Ralph Bighead, son of Ed and Bev, finishes his animated series, The Fatheads, and is required to pitch another pilot to the studio before he can retire to focus on actual art. Uninterested, he hears a crack from Rocko, Heffer, and Filbert, and has the three friends work on his pilot, hoping they’ll make the worst cartoon ever. Somehow, their series, Wacky Delly, becomes a huge hit, and Ralph is intent on destroying it before it’s too late.

This episode is a brilliant parody of the animation industry, hitting a little close to home (Ralph is voiced by show creator Joe Murray, and many believe that the rise and fall of Wacky Delly is comparable to neighboring Nickelodeon hit Ren & Stimpy). It’s an insanely clever half hour of television that pulls no punches and has tons of little gags that make up for a great experience )a half hour broadcast of just a jar of mayonnaise? Grody).

But we all know why we love this episode so much. And say it with me. “I am the cheese…”

AAAHH!!! Real Monsters- “The Switching Hour”

The best episode of the show has got to be the first. “The Switching Hour” is a clever half hour that introduces the characters well and has some very clever moments.

On Halloween, all the monsters are hoping to head out into the human world and scare some kids, but after noticing his student’s incompetence, the Gromble punishes his monsters by staying home this year. Ickis, Oblina, and Krumm decide to head out anyway, and wreck havoc. All goes well, until Ickis runs into a kid with a costume that looks identical to his body, and the two get swapped- the kid goes into the monster world, while Ickis goes to school in his “Halloween costume”.

Overall, this is a pretty funny episode. Real Monsters wasn’t one of the best, all things considered, but the four main characters are each likable, the monsters’ misconceptions of the human world are cute, and the ending is rewarding. Before you knock the show, at least check this one out.

Hey Arnold!- “Helga on the Couch”

Some of Hey Arnold’s best moments, surprisingly, don’t involve much of Arnold at all. When you get down to it, he isn’t that interesting of a character. Arnold is kind of there to make the rest of the supporting cast react. And nowhere is that more prevalent in Helga G. Patacki. Her character arc on the show is arguably the most important, even outshining Arnold himself.

In “Helga on the Couch”, the school’s new therapist decides to check into Mr. Simmons’ class for the day. Out of all the nutjobs in the classroom, the one she attracts herself to the most is the girl throwing spitballs at the boy with the football shaped head. She suggests that Helga takes therapy sessions, much to her family’s dismay.

Helga herself is reluctant to take this mandatory request, and at first, she turns the tables, asking the doctor questions about her child. Before long, Helga delves into as many of her issues that the 20 minute episode span can handle, including her family troubles, confusing emotions, and above all, Arnold. The reason Helga loves the title character so much is explained here, and while I’d rather not spoil the episode, I think you might see not only Helga’s character, but the show itself, in another light when you watch it.

There are some really depressing moments in this episode, some even shocking, considering that this is a kids show. Few other episodes of any series in this demographic are as emotionally involving or complex as “Helga on the Couch”. It features all the best qualities of Hey Arnold! in one episode, making it the essential episode of the series.

The Angry Beavers- “The Day the World Got Really Screwed Up”

In this Halloween classic, the Beavers find the house of their favorite B-movie actor, Oxnard Montalvo, and attempt to crash it. Unfortunately, what they don’t realize is that soon, Norbert and Daggett are bond to face every B-movie cliché in the book, as all of Montalvo’s films come to life tonight.

This episode is a lot of fun, especially for fans of campy sci-fi films from the 1950’s and 60’s. Nothing is sacred, and tons of good lines are spouted (“Another moment and it would’ve been… later”), while Norb and Dag’s eclectic chemistry is present as they attempt to save the day. The atmosphere also adds to the enjoyment, since it fits the story perfectly, and makes for good laughs.

A very clever episode from a clever, wacky Nicktoon at its peak. Just tons of fun to watcj.

As Told By Ginger- “And She Was Gone”

While a fair amount of the time, Ginger was a melodramatic bore, the show had it’s moments of effective serious sequences, a big heart, and clever writing. Of the later Klasky-Csupo shows (The Wild Thornberrys, Rocket Power, later Rugrats/All Grown Up), it was easily the most tolerable.

Episodes like “And She Was Gone” are why. In this one, Ginger writes a poem to enter in a contest. While Ginger has proven her writing skills previously on the show, her teacher thinks that there’s more subtext to the poem, and recommends that she speaks to the school therapist. After this heads out, the school goes through a depressive state, and Ginger tries to prove that she doesn’t relate to this poem and that everyone needs to get off her case. Doing this helps Ginger find out things about herself that she wasn’t able to consider before.

Meanwhile, Carl and Hoodsey wish away a random student, and when she actually disappears, Carl starts to realize that she might be the one for him. Two emotionally harsh and depressing stories for the price of one.

Overall, As Told by Ginger wasn’t a great show. It had good characters (Courtney in particular is a highlight, like in the picture I chose for this episode), funny moments, and could handle relatable issues well. But what held it back was that it played everything too safe, making it seem like just about every other superficial show about kids in middle school released around this time, and a lot of Carl and Hoodsey’s subplots don’t click with the main stories. Not to mention that the designs, like every other Klasky-Csupo show, were hard to look at.

This is one of the episodes where everything falls into place, and does so well. If more episodes of the show were like this, it would have been a lot better.

Invader Zim- “Gaz, Taster of Pork”

Gaz is the best character in Invader Zim. A minority opinion, sure, but hear me out. Gaz’s apathy towards both Zim and Dib’s bullshit is how most viewers should watch the show, hating both and craving a snack. Her love for junk food, video games, cartoons, and all other good bad stuff reflects the general fanbase of the show. Better than Gir at least, who borderlines on annoying a fair amount of the time.

This is one of the few episodes about her, and is a fine one at that. In it, Dib experiments with his spell drives, and decides to try one of them on his sister in her sleep. When Gaz wakes up, she discovers that everything she eats tastes like pork, which comes to the attention of the media. Dib and Gaz’s father, Professor Membrane, keeps her shelter while doing research, as she’s now considered to be the Pork Girl. During all of this, Dib tries to find a way to save his sister’s sense of taste, and goes through hell to do it.

This is a rare episode with little of Zim or Gir, and it works. Dib is probably the weakest character in the show, but he’s fine here, and Gaz has typically sharp lines. The episode as whole is strange and very dark, like any good Invader Zim story, but with a sense of urgency and heart missing in most others, giving it an edge over the rest.

The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius- “Stranded”

One thing I’ve always liked about Jimmy Neutron was Jimmy and Cindy’s relationship. They both egg on each other frequently, but there’s some obvious sparks there, and the longer the show went on, the further their feelings and attitude towards each other developed. Now, normally I’m not one to ship elementary school kids together in a kids show, but their flings are familiar to how kids their age interact with their crushes, and makes for some entertaining scenes.

“Stranded” puts the two in a deserted island together, where they have no choice but to stop their bickering for a short period of time and help each other out. While it takes them both a little to adapt, Jimmy and Cindy really get to enjoy each other’s company, and make for some cute moments. Meanwhile, Carl, Sheen, and Libby also get stranded on Jimmy’s hover boat, without gas, as they try to save their friends, and make for good comic relief.

A cute episode for a cute, somewhat overlooked show. I find Jimmy Neutron to hold up better now that I’m watching it without Nickelodeon over airing it, and it’s a fun, if imperfect show. This is among the best stuff from it.

Avatar: The Last Airbender- “Zuko Alone”

Book 2 is easily the most solid arc in Avatar. The first has a rocky start, while the third has a little too much filler to forgive the highlights of the season. As for the second, while the premiere was weak and there were cases of filler throughout, it held an engaging story throughout, full of just about everything.

My personal favorite part is “Zuko Alone”, which delves into the past of the Fire Prince. Here, we see his life before gaining that painful scar and his eventual banishment from his nation, and get a chance to meet his loving mother and see what he and Azula were like as kids. Final verdict? They weren’t so different back then as they are at this point in the show’s run. We also see how neglectful and downright evil Ozai can be, and a hint or two towards the location of Zuko’s mother,

In the present time, Zuko heads into a part of the Earth Kingdom that resembles the Avatar equivalent of a John Ford setting. Zuko finds a family to spend shelter in, and when raiders come to distrupt the peace of the village, the firebender uses his will to make sure that doesn’t happen. He also loses the respect of the villagers he found in the beginning, and heads off into his quest to regain the respect of his father.

With none of the Gaang to hold him back, Zuko holds his own for a half hour, and proves to be an endearing lead with and without his tragic side taking over his personality. This is the series at its best, being both unbelievable and human at the same time, intense and calm, strong and sensible. You couldn’t ask for any more of the series.

Wait a minute! Wait a minute! There's more!

SpongeBob SquarePants- “Pre-Hibernation Week”/“Life of Crime”

Since most of SpongeBob’s episodes exceeding eleven minutes aren’t all that great (and most of the half-hour episodes are just regular-length episodes overblown with Patchy the Pirate sequences), I decided to make a special slot for it to name two of the best episodes. Both of which aired in the same half-hour.

The former has the Sponge want to give Sandy a fun time before she heads off for hibernation, which leads to a day of extreme extremeness, nearly killing him in the process. This causes SpongeBob to hide from Sandy, making her go into a panic trying to find him.

Some of the games SpongeBob and Sandy play are so out there, that they're hysterical (find the hay in the needle stack?), and there are good lines between the two. As well as Patrick, who has a memorable ending scene. But the real highlight of the episode is Pantera. Yes, that Pantera. Look for their contribution in this episode. Won't be that hard to hear out.

The second short involves SpongeBob and Patrick try to get their hands on a balloon, the "wrong" way. After popping their broken balloon, the two go into hiding and try to do the right thing by the end.

This one is just out there. Spongebob and Patrick's chemistry is present as well as ever, and some of their dialogue and expressions are great. And this one also contains a memorable ending.

Like this lit? Hate this list? Feel free to tell us, and share some of your other choices!

Ludovico Trials: Infinite Stratos -- Infinitely Awful by Kiddington

2011-08-14T07:46:00.003-04:00

Episode 1 – All my Classmates are Female

Believe it or not, we actually kick things off on a bit of a flying start. Literally. Cut to scenic, sunset-splashed ocean setting, where several peeps in airborne robot suits (a guy, buncha girls, and some unidentifiable person hiding behind a tinted visor) are duking it out in what appears to be the BATTLE OF THE CENTURY. Or something. I'm given the vibe that visor-guy appears to be the antagonist, while the other kids are our fearless heroes, defending the Earth from all of his and/or her acts of vile villainy. Or maybe not; this sequence never truly elaborates who exactly these characters are, so we just assume visor-guy is bad (why else would everyone be trying to hand him his lunch?). Punches are thrown, beams are shot... none of it really goes anywhere, although the kids appear to be losing. In one final act of desperation, the one blue-haired guy makes a head-on charge at visor-guy in a blind rage, screaming "NO MORE ESCAPING THIS TIIIIIME!!!". As punches connect, a blinding flash of light fills the screen... and then we cut to the title screen, whereby the first, last, and only remotely interesting sequence of Episode 1 draws to a close. In a definite "WHAT THE FUCK" moment, we're left wondering just what exactly was supposed to happen here. The conclusion to this Clash of Titans will unfortunately have to wait another day, I'm afraid. And thus begins, Infinite Stratos.

Robots! Lasers! GIRLS!!!!! BOOBS!!!!! AWWWWWWWWWW YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH....no.

Welcome to Fantasy Japan, circa-2011; a pristine landscape dotted with spiralesque buildings and other architectural feats not even remotely possible in real Japan. It doesn't take long until we pan to a school, where our male protagonist (it's that guy from the intro fight! See! He is good!) is sweating it out over the fact that he's sitting in a classroom FILLED WITH GURLZ. *gasp* This must obviously be a clerical error, right? WRONG! We'll get to the schematics on why he's here later, but for now, our focus turns to the classrooms green-haired, big-boobed teacher, Maya Yamada... who, for whatever reason, randomly shrieks and stammers without provocation several times right off the hop (probably because there's a BOY *double gasp* sitting amongst them in their frilly classroom of ultimate girliness). Classroom intros soon commence, whereby we now know the name of this strapping young lad that our series will revolve around; Ichika Orimura, aka THE ONLY MAN IN THE WORLD WHO CAN... no, wait, we haven't gotten to that part yet. Sorryz.

Poor son of a bitch.

Ichika's "introduction speech" doesn't go over too well, and a prototypical anime pratfall blankets the class. As he ponders what went wrong, he's given a swift and painful punch to the head. Only family could be capable of such a blow, and as it turns out, BIG SISTA CHIFUYU is on the scene. What is she doing here, Ichika wonders? Much to his shock and awe, the Chif be runnin' this here classroom. That's riiiiiiiiiight; she's the teacher! A brother and sister, student-to-teacher combination! Turns out, Yamada and her breasts were only there fill in until Chief Chifuyu arrived. Oh lawd, what ARE we in for next? How about a painfully annoying scene where practically every girl in the class swoons and literally froths at the mouth over the mere IDEA that THE Chifuyu Orimura will be TEACHING THEIR CLASS?!?! That sound good? "Lady Chifuyu, scold us more!" "Cuss us out!" "Drive our asses with a cattleprod!" Okay, perhaps I exaggerate just a tad... but you get the idea.

Six minutes into this thing, and I'm already sick of it. And heck, this is the just the boring, state-mandated introductory episode. I've still got 11 more of these things to go, let alone 20 more minutes of this crappy episode. Crap; why did I agree to do this again? Is there an out-clause in my contract, by chance?

...anyway, Chifuyu (who DEMANDS to be called "Miss Orimura") is quite the stern taskmaster, especially when it comes to her bro. Slamming his head on the desk and further asserting her position of dominance, she begins to lay this course on the line for everyone, as the basic plotlines begin to fall into place. The girls (and Ichika) are attending this school to learn how to pilot an IS robot, which are those things the kids were flying around in during the opening battle sequence. In a flashback/quasi-history lesson, we learn that people smacking each other silly in these things is apparently considered an Olympic sport in this universe, and Chifsie here was once one of the best in the world at kicking ass and taking names. Then, for reasons not further touched upon, she suddenly retires OUT OF NOWHERE, and is now teaching a group of wide-eyed teenagers to kick ass in their flying robot suits with the best of 'em. Or so I take it.

Another boring history lesson on the IS suit ensues; they were originally designed for space travel, it didn't work out, now they beat each other senseless in them as a form of "sport", yada yada yada... you're not missing much. Oh, and uh, yeah; apparently, only FEMALES can use these here flyin' robot suits. Thaaaaaaaaaat explains why the classroom is only filled with stoopid girls... or does it? Why is Ichika here? He's not a girl, silly! It's quite simple, really; you're looking at the one and only male IN THE WORLD who can pilot an IS suit. I know, I know; it sounds much more exciting than it truly is. Boy, if only the rest of us possessed this quote unquote "talent".

Following an incredibly boring (been using that term way too much already) scene where Ichika and his long-lost childhood friend, Houki Shinonono, engage in awkward and mundane conversation, we cut back to class, where Ich is struggling to comprehend the lesson at hand. This is, of course, hilarious in the sense that the kid apparently knows how to fully pilot and operate an IS suit, yet he's totally clueless on the textbook lesson plan... which basically explains how to operate said suit. Cue laugh track. I dunno, I'm just thinking they wanted another excuse for his sister to bop him again (which, she does, because he's such an idiot), thereby adding to the lulz count. Comedy is at a premium here, so physical violence (in a "comical" sense) is the best you get.

Now things get interesting; I use that very loosely, of course. It's a recess break, and some blonde chick approaches Ichika at his desk. Immediately, she has a problem with his "greeting", and the shades of her character are already as overt as the sky is blue. Cecilia Alcott's her name, and being a total stuck-up bitch is her game. She's a Brit, and apparently, is the rough equivalent of a Pokemon Master at using an IS. This begs an obvious, and largely unanswered question; if she's such an *expert* and *elite* at using these things, why is she in a school for beginners? Oops. Sorry to break it to you, Mr. Owl, but the world may never know.

That face says it all...

If you ever decide to watch this, you'll learn to hate Cecilia almost immediately. She sucks. Following a few bitching sequences on her behalf, and a couple more atypical anime pratfalls brought on by Ichika's lack of basic knowledge, we learn some more stuff; apparently, they have these things called "Elite Contenders" in the IS world, which are gifted folk chosen by their respective countries to represent their homeland in IS competitions. Yep, you guessed it; Cecilia happens to be one of these elites, which is a point she drives home more than enough for the average viewer, let alone the roadside boulders, to get the gist of. She's really full of herself, and is already becoming more than enough of a miserable bitch to make me wanna tune out. If only.

The day's just about over as Ichika trods to the boarding hall, complete with his creepy stalker harem fanclub in tow (did I mention? He's something of a minor celebrity among most of these girls, on account of the whole "only male who can operate an IS" thing he's got going for him). As he begins to settle into his new abode, a shocking reality begins to set in; his roommate IS A GURL. *triple gasp* Not only that, but this particular girl just so happens to his old... ahem, friend, Houki Shinonono. Yes, that one. For these two apparently being childhood buds, they sure don't show it here. Houki (who HATES to be called by her first name) goes postal at this point, and literally attempts to kill Ichika with a wooden sword. Several times, as a matter of fact. The girl has a hairpin temper, and she's set off by the most insignificant things you can think of, ranging from Ichika speaking to her in a casual manner, to him accidentally picking up her bra with and making a bunch of dumb comments about it. Ok, so maybe I can see why a girl wouldn't like THAT. She calls him a perv a couple of times, and that's about the end of it. She's still mad the next day, in what I assume will be one of many recurring themes in this show (along with guns, lasers, robots, bitchy British chicks, and lotz and lotz of BOOBS).

Too bad that didn't kill me.

Thank GOD, it's the last scene. Finally, this 25-minute endurance test through the doldrums of mediocrity is winding down. We're back in school, and Miss Orimura announces that a class representative must be chosen. Naturally, everyone nominates Ichika, much to his dismay. As he begins to plead his case against the decisions made by his nutso fanclub, a familiar voice stands in to voice her disapproval. Yep, you know where this is going; Cecilia Alcott is BACK, and unlike every other girl in the class, she is NOT an Ichika fan. As she tears down not only Ich for being a stoopid boy, but the country of Japan as a whole, it's time for someone to step in... and who else but Ich? They trade barbs briefly, before Cecilia becomes so incensed that she challenges him to a duel. This next bit of dialogue seems to imply that, because of the invention of the IS suit, women are now stronger than men and therefore superior, and if the two genders should ever go to war one day the women would eradicate the men in mere days, thanks to their fancy flying robot suits. Or something to that effect. By this point in the episode, I wasn't paying a whole lot of attention anymore; just praying that it'd finally end. Miss Orimura enthusiastically agrees to let the battle commence next Monday, and off we go. The credits roll, the party's over, and the curtain falls. And I'm simply left wondering what it was I just watched, and why it sucked so much.

God, what an absolutely boring show if there ever was one. I know it's just the introductory episode and all (which tend to be boring in the case of most TV series anyway), but man... I still have to watch ELEVEN more of these? I cannot possibly imagine this going uphill from here. The plot of the series, and overall emphasis on teenage boobs, is already creepy enough... and by all accounts (from what I read), the borderline hentai nature of Episode 1 is basically ratcheted up to 20 during the next few installments. Why, Animation Revelation? WHYYYYYYYYYY must you do this to MEEEEEEEEEE? You are TEARING ME APAR... okay, so maybe it wasn't THAT bad, but you get the idea. It still sucked, don't kid yourself.

NEXT TIME, ON INFINITE STRATOS!!! Bitchy British girl and the WORLDS ONLY CERTIFIED MALE PILOT OF ROBOT-MECHA BADASSERY take to the skies in an all-out war of robots, lasers, boobs... ah, you get the idea. The fun times are sure to keep 'a rollin, so stay tuned!

A Year of Disney's Shorts: Set 7- by Avaitor

2011-08-12T22:39:00.002-04:00

Again, sorry for the delay, and this time, I only have two entries to share. But first, go read.

Mickey’s Amateurs (1937)

Eh, more or less a colorized remake of “Orphan’s Benefit”. Not much to say here. Some different events, same scenario.

Mickey Plays Papa (1934)

Now this one is a little more fun. It stars off with Mickey reading Pluto a spooky bedtime story (because who doesn’t do that with their dogs, right?), when a curious stranger comes to Mickey’s door and leaves behind a baby mouse. The baby’s cry spooks the two, and has them come out to find the baby and entertain him. Mickey tries a few gags, including a cute Chaplin impression to please the baby, but it’s Pluto that grabs its attention.

The animation and atmosphere in this short is phenomenal. The cartoon starts off with a spooky opening, done in neatly inked animation, and leads up to a series of well-timed gags and silly expressions. Pluto especially gets some vibrant work in his pleas, overall making for a fun experience.

Ludovico Trials: Kicking Clannad in the Nads (Part 7) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-08-12T21:31:00.008-04:00

Yeah… it’s one of those episodes.

Episode 7: Star-Shaped Plot Tumors

Previously on Clannad, Tomoya and Nagisa find out that Ms. Ibuki can neither see nor hear Fuko. The show doesn’t really explain why, so it just expects us to roll with it and bawl at how they can’t share their true feelings with each other now. Yeah, call me a soulless monster for not feeling it, but I need logic before I can get the slightest bit involved in drama. Even if it’s magic, it still has to make sense. Unless you’re a sugar-crazed five-year-old with a liking for cops cutting heads off, there is no excuse for such a blatant exploitation of melodrama here.

After the opening, Ms. Ibuki remarks about the rumours that Fuko is out and about at the high school. But because she can’t comprehend the magic of friendship, our stick in the mud notes how it’s impossible for her to be hanging out at school since she’s been at the hospital all this time. Then we get this lovely piece of dialogue.

“Even if only in her dreams, I’m glad if she’s surrounded by lots of friends. Good friends. Close friends. If she can only dream, then I hope she is always with her friends. If she were ever to wake up and then come back to this school, will the two of you make a solemn vow to me that you will be the very best friends?”

Why does it feel like I’ve stumbled upon scrapped Téa dialogue for Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series? Littlekuriboh, is there something you aren’t telling us?

After hearing comments from Tomoya that any normal person would regard as creepy, Ms. Ibuki just tells the two to keep Fuko company even though she just doubted that they ever actually talked to her. She wants it one way, but it’s the other way.

Tomoya and Nagisa both say that she should just marry instead of angst over her sister, because Fuko wants her to. Instead of giving Tomoya an introduction to Mr. Mace, Ms. Ibuki just kind of mutters about not wanting her happiness to take away her involvement with her sister.

With redundancy time is done, Fuko plays with Kyou’s Swinub and invites it to the wedding, which leads to the question: How the fuck can a Pokemon see this girl if her own sister can’t?

Tomoya and Nagisa then angst about how Ms. Ibuki can’t see Fuko, with the red one crying and blaming herself for some odd reason. And as showcased for the last three episodes, we get more scenes of Fuko handing out starfish while our main two keep contemplating over shit.

And since the show can’t be boorish enough, Tomoya and Fuko decide to invite Kotomi to the wedding. In the middle of being handed a starfish, Kotomi begins to list out scientific names and brief characteristics because no one in this show can have natural dialogue.

Barefoot, shy girl with encyclopedic knowledge? There’s a fetish for that.

After making an off-hand comment about how the two are awkward, Tomoya has to go on a tongue twister’s face-off with Fuko. Our protagonist starts off with, “Kris Kringle carefully crunched on multicolored crimson candy canes while climbing the catacombs,” while Fuko just makes incoherent dog noises. What an abhorrent abomination that knows no bounds in bombarding my brain with belligerent, blighted boneheads. Sunohara pops up since you can’t have a tedious scene without him on board, only to get attacked by a horde of Fuko’s paedophiles. At least it wasn’t another from visit from DEM LEGS, but that’s like saying getting mauled in the face by monkeys is better than getting shot in both kneecaps.

Tomoya and Nagisa once again talk to Ms. Ibuki about her marriage with Future Tomoya. Because of nostalgia, she wants to have the wedding at the school surrounded by all her students.

Crap, I suddenly got a flashback to a Little Bill episode with the plot like that, except it was straightforward and made sense.

Oh wait, this is a Clannad recap. Got to get in focus.

Furashubaaku time begins as Ms. Ibuki remembers a vacation where she and Fuko were at a beach. She remembers how Fuko didn’t talk to any other girls her age, and instead committed bad touch upon starfish. Instead of doing the normal thing and introducing her to people, she gave her the cold shoulder in the hopes that Fuko would take the hint and find someone else to annoy (and admittedly, it worked, kind of).

But of course, she got into an accident after the entrance ceremony, because tragedy and little sisters go together like salarymen and hookers.

Then after being asked why these two are so obsessed with trying to help her sister, Tomoya tries to justify it by saying how he and Nagisa are as awkward as she is. Because each one of us is

A brain,

An athlete,

A basket case who also happens to be a brain,

A princess,

And a criminal, right, Tomoya?

Then there’s even more scenes of Fuko handing starfish, with Tomoya contradicting himself by saying she’s not awkward at all.

At yet another empty classroom, they have a meeting with Sunohara about the wedding and stuff. The only reason he’s there is because he believes there’s a love triangle in this show, sad bastard. When in fact, he’s so out of the loop that he thinks Fuko is handing out shuriken—or in his words, “Shoreeken”—as wedding invitations

After being told that very few people know what these things are, Fuko concocts a plan to make a school announcement about how they’re all starfish. And with all these set to motion, she plans to start a cult with these aquatic creatures as their messiah. How far until she’ll give all the members Kool-Aid to drink?

Nagisa proposes that they hand out dangos as invitations, on the basis that they’re cute. And oh Christ, she ends up having a fight with Fuko about whether or not the dango is cuter than the starfish. But being Clannad, they quickly decide that both are the cutest and resolve their difference like so.

Fuko proceeds to orgasm again, with Tomoya taking advantage of the situation yet again by making her poke and pummel at Sunohara’s face.

Commence titles and a knock-off of the 20th Century Fox fanfare, as Tomoya has mastered “Swapping the Sculpture in Hand.” Having accomplished all this, he has finally become the “Fuko Master”, which is slightly more dignified than being Game Master, a bit less than being BeastMaster, and no way can you compare it to being Pokemon Master.

Deciding that they need to talk someone about the wedding, Tomoya and Nagisa go to Hitler for help. Having known Ms. Ibuki since presumably escaping Germany, Hitler reminisces on how friendly they were to each other. But being over a century old and out of his culture, he confuses which Ibuki he’s talking about and admits that’s he rather forgetful. He even confuses Tomoya for the future one when being told that his friend is getting married.

But having honed his abilities of foresight after losing the Second World War, he correctly predicts that they want to set the wedding at the school and quickly decides to make it so.

A bit sad that he didn’t go into a senile stupor and talk about how Rory punched him in the face once, but I digress.

They tell the good news to Ms. Ibuki, and she replies with how Fuko’s coma has gotten worse. Then they cry again, because the director thinks that we’re babies that will mimic what we see.

Back at the dorm, Sunohara makes note on how a crowd of students didn’t so much as notice Fuko trying to hand out starfish to them. You’d think he’d try to get Fuko to walk in their way or touch them to see if they really can’t feel her, but drama forbids it. Oh, and people are forgetting the mere fact that they even have starfishes. Shouldn’t dying make Fuko’s ghost more visible to everybody? But I suppose since there’s absolutely no evidence of how afterlife logic works, the writers can just make up shit for the sake of it. Next, they’re going to make believe that robots and little girls from another dimension can turn back time and save people from dying. But they really can’t be stupid enough to do something like that, can they?

Well that was abrupt. Goodnight, everybody!

Ludovico Trials: Kicking Clannad in the Nads (Part 6) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-08-01T03:39:00.004-04:00

Episode 6 – The Older and Younger Sister’s Plot Contrivance

It’s morning, and Tomoya has been introduced to the sight of Mrs. Furukawa’s star bread. Lined up on all the rows of the bakery, Nagisa’s mom takes an abnormal pride in how she “designed every single one of them, from cream-filled to jam-filled.” After Tomoya bemoans her for concocting such a horrid idea, she falls into a Degrassi moment and complains that her husband said the same thing. Unlike the previous bouts with Baking Blue Screen of Death, she quickly gets back to her feet and asks Tomoya to try one. He doesn’t want any, which makes her go into another Degrassi moment and how she can’t do it alone with the husband. And then Tomoya remarks how quick she was to perceive such.

The matriarch drags herself away in time for Nagisa and Fuko to enter scene. Apparently, Mrs. Furukawa just missed a phone call that Fuko recalls as, “He was breathing heavily and laughing a lot and then he kept saying ’I love you, I love you’ over and over.” And then he screamed once he realized whom he was talking to.

The Creed of Furukawa: Be hot, be naughty, and be courteous.

Fuko cums again, which Tomoya realizes is trigged by the starfish. He then makes an odd hypothesis about how Fuko might never recover, and will become stuck in a future where she will become the herald of a Berserkesque universe surrounded by porn music and badly drawn ghosts.

Tell me why, tell me why, tell me what you want?
I don’t know why; don’t know why, why I watch this show.

And of course, Nagisa gets mesmerized and wants Tomoya to tell more about it. He ignores her and shoves a juice box up Fuko’s nose again to interrupt her orgasm. Despite this, she still manages to fulfill the poorly worded euphemism department with “And my throat is all wet for some reason.”

Tomoya finds success in how he has mastered “Shooting Juice Up the Nose!” Next, he shall accomplish the arduous task of mastering “Putting Hat on the Head!” as well as “Walking With Daughter In Snow!”

At school, we are given more scenes of Fuko trying and failing to hand out starfish to random kids. While this hasn’t drawn the attention of normal people, it has done a fine job luring the paedophiles in. Three guys jump in and mutter about how they’re going to start a “Fuko Fan Club” because of how touched they are at seeing a little girl giving out stuff without explaining what they’re for. Fuko quite obviously doesn’t want to be even near them. Then they run away after confusing Tomoya for Fuko’s brother, which just seems insulting to say the least.

The three decide to concoct a plan to distribute as many starfish as possible by taking advantage of the upcoming Founder’s Festival. But fuck productivity, because Sunohara quickly joins the gang with the desire to help. However, Fuko doesn’t want him because he’s weird by special girl standards. In order to prove his worth, Sunohara decides to go into a carving contest with Fuko. The one to carve a Nue—a Japanese chimera—first wins. Fuko misinterprets it as having the “tail of a bitch” so you’d assume she’ll give it purple hair. Nagisa, making Fuko seem like a MENSA member, asks if she could go see a Nue at the Zoo. It’s times like these that I feel Tomoya’s pain.

As the competition ends, Fuko turns out to have carved a frog. Drowning in his pride, Sunohara tactlessly cuts himself and renders her the winner. Yeah, wasn’t this school supposed to have the most kids graduate and go to college?

With arts & crafts time over, Nagisa finally decides that the Founder’s Festival is the best time that Ms. Ibuki should meet Fuko. And you couldn’t do it before, why?

She also jokes about how they’ve essentially become Fuko’s parents, only to blush again because nobody can admit their goddamn feelings in this show.

The two then stumble upon Future Tomoya and find out that he’s Ms. Ibuki’s fiancé. After telling him the plan, Future Tomoya decides that this might be something that will “lift her little spirits”. However, Ms. Ibuki is having doubts since she quit teaching there. But after being told Fuko’s around, she decides to go and make Nagisa sob like a stillborn again.

Next day, they find Fuko asleep and surrounded by starfish. As Tomoya gives her a piggyback ride to school, Mr. Furukawa scoffs at his weakness by saying, “Quit your bellyaching kid! If you were any kind of real man, you should be able to juggle a girl or two without a sweat.” I think I may have found a character I like in this show.

As they walk to school, Tomoya moans about how Fuko always has her guard up when in front of normal people, but Nagisa scolds him again and says that they should treasure Fuko and how she’ll reunite with her sister. Fuko soon wakes up and talks about how she had a wet dream that involved playing with Tomoya at a beach.

They go to an auditorium and say that Fuko should be there, who then gives Nagisa a starfish despite how she probably already has one.

After that, the three find the paedophiles again who are selling starfish merchandise in the hopes of helping Fuko’s cause, which causes her to cum again. It seems that the orgasm was so long that when she snaps out of it, she’s in a maid’s outfit along with Kyou and Ryou. And because this is a school festival, you can never have too many underage maids, right?! When being told that she can offer people starfish with notice, she blurts out, “ARE YOU SHORT OF STARFISH?!” This somehow gives Tomoya an award for mastering “Leaving Her At A Different Place!”

Soon after waiting on tables, Fuko has become well known throughout the school for reasons unknown to any sane viewer. Nagisa then proclaims that she wants drama club members with just as much dedication as Fuko, which just feels kind of sad if you ask me.

Nagisa and Tomoya get a brief visit from Sunohara, who tries to admit his feelings for the former. But just as a second goes by, they ignore him. I would say he’s getting cock-blocked, but that would imply there was an actual cock to block.

Sunohara starts wandering around in search of poontang, only to come across a bear that roundhouse kicks him through a window. The bear takes off its head to reveal Tomoyo, who has decided to become a furry in order to achieve anonymity. She also accepts Fuko’s starfish on the basis that it’s hand-made, contrasting that which wants its hands all over DEM LEGS.

Fuko goes, “She’s a very kind person.” in an attempt to create an illusion that she’s more than just a punch line to poorly-executed comedy relief. Nagisa then remembers about Sunohara, but Tomoya just shrugs it off.

The girl from the entrance ceremony—the one who looks like Tashigi from One Piece—also appears and decides to not be a bitch for once by accepting the wedding invitation. Yay for bipolarity!

After a round of montages, the three finally decide to confront Ms. Ibuki. However, drama occurs when they realize that she can only see the two of them… wait, why can’t she see Fuko? Everyone else could interact with her just fine. If even a trio of toddler-lovers can see Fuko clear as day, I don’t see why her bleeding sister can’t. Just because it’s supernatural doesn’t mean you can’t explain why they can’t meet. This is fucking bullshit, I can’t believe that this--*cuts*

Editor: Sorry for the rant there. As soon as we get the kinks out of our recap slave, we’ll be able to present to you the next wholesome installment of Kicking Clannad In the Nads! Be seeing you…

Ludovico Trials: Kicking Clannad in the Nads (Part 5) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-07-26T21:36:00.008-04:00

Episode 5: The Scenery With No One to Care About

Last time on Clannad, it was revealed that Fuko’s the centerpiece for the show’s first arc. More specifically, she’s the comatose little sister to a character we only saw once so far.

Now put that fistful of sleeping pills away, for the worst has yet to some.

After putting two and two together, Tomoya starts playing Scully and remarks on how mental it is for a ghost to be living in the school. More practical situations start running through his mouth; like how it might just be a girl who believes she’s Ms. Ibuki’s sister. But this is Clannad, so rationality plays no hand in this world.

The two decide to meet the woman in question, who Tomoya recognizes as the “really pretty” girl that he gave bread to a couple episodes ago. Then, Ms. Ibuki wonders if the two are a couple, which Nagisa denies like Hell. And after being told that Tomoya’s single, she starts:

And she goes:

Then she moes the fuck up.

Argh, how the relationship teases ache.

With blush hour over, Nagisa congratulates Ms. Ibuki about the wedding soon after. But the fact is, Ms. Ibuki never told anyone besides her dear sister Fuko. And Fuko’s comatose. You know? That her dear sister’s in a coma? Right? You got that? Because just in case you didn’t hear it the first time, she ends up repeating the same thing ad nauseum.

And she goes on about how her sister’s color looks better, because green hair and jaundice eyes are definitely signs of optimum health. However, her sister’s condition makes her question whether or not she should get married.

What? There’s being selfless and there’s being thickheaded. It’s not like your husband’s going to go, “BITCH, I REFUSE TO GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO SEE SISTER. NOW GO MAKE ME DINNER OR I PUNCH YOU IN FACE!”

After Ms. Ibuki leaves, Nagisa angsts about how she didn’t have the heart to tell her that Fuko’s at school. Tomoya asks her why the fuck not, to which she replies, “But I feel like it’s not something you should say out loud without regard for someone’s feelings.” Then she cries about how Fuko and her precious stars. Tomoya then wonders why they aren’t going ahead with the drama club, but Nagisa moans about how helping Fuko has become the top priority.

Hey, Nagisa. Fuck you and your feelings. Just have Fuko and Ms. Ibuki meet, cue heartfelt moment between sisters, and go on to your drama club. Don’t start up some bloody plot thread about helping Fuko find her path in life when it’s standing right in front of you. But what am I talking about? Something ridiculously absurd and convenient for drama’s sake would probably happen to stop the two from meeting anyway.

Anyway, the two take Fuko to the Furukawa’s. Fuko takes an alias to make sure they don’t know she’s related to the Ibuki’s. And of course, Mrs. Furukawa almost immediately asks what her last name is. But as time have proved over and over again, Fuko is slower than an amputee tortoise and decides to take the last name of the family next door, “Isogai”. Tomoya pulls the “ZOMG EET’S A COINCIDENCE!” card, and everything goes perfectly well. Because bringing home the asocial girl with a knife is always the right thing to do.

After that, Tomoya goes to the dorm and finds a horde of guys running out. The landlady, Misae Sagara, complains about how the guys keep being peeping toms. Then, Sunohara pops in. And before he can say anything, Sagara beats the fuck out of him.

So yeah, a blue-haired, abusive woman named Sagara? Goddamn it, KyoAni. Stop reminding me of shows I should be watching instead of this.

After Sunohara reminds us that he’s a blight upon the male gender, Tomoya tells him that they have to take care of Fuko. Not being there for most of the previous bouts with her, Sunohara reasonably yells, “WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!” So I guess he’s seemingly gained tact after that beating. Good for him.

At the Furukawa’s, Tomoya finds the entire family carving wooden stars with Fuko, to the detriment of actually keeping shop. Afterward, they leave after being remembering they have lives. Tomoya is in awe of how many stars there are, remarking on how the floor resembles the night sky. However, Fuko corrects him by saying that they’re starfish.

Then Nagisa gushes about how cute they are.

*insert your own paraphrasing of a certain Dover Boys quote here*

At school, Fuko’s out giving starfish to people without any reminder of what they’re for. Tomoya asks her why she isn’t seeing her sister yet, to which she utters, “I… I really would like to, but I don’t know if my voice will reach her.” In short, she’s shy and giving out starfish is her cry for help.

After staring at a wall for the last ten minutes, I resumed the episode just as the three go to the library and meet Droopy. Fuko gives her a starfish, and she just kind of has this “…uh” reaction to it.

Then Droopy gets told that it’s for a wedding invitation, and she tells Fuko to do her best. Tomoya notes how she has a very high tolerance level for these kinds of things. Is this show actually confirming my belief that she’s stoned all the time?

At the hall, Fuko starts antagonizing Tomoya about how he’s the natural enemy. After Nagisa scolds him for no reason whatsoever, Fuko creams herself again. Tomoya decides to take advantage of Fuko’s orgasm and uses Ryou to pretend that he’s become a girl. So when Fuko finishes cumming herself, she finds our friendly neighborhood doormat standing in front of her, who says that she’s Okazaki after being given the Jusenkyo treatment. Despite giving the worst delivery possible, Fuko believes it, because she’s retar—special. She’s very special. She’s almost as special as a headless chicken.

Then she gets scared that she “might just turn a futa or something.” You are childish enough to make starfish and hand them out to people, yet you know what a futa is? ARGH!

Kyou comes in and tells Tomoya to fuck off from her sister. Upon seeing Kyou, Ryou, and Tomoya together, Fuko comes to the conclusion that there are 3 Okazakis. And to hammer it further, a title appears, saying that Tomoya mastered the ability of “Switching the Person You’re Talking To”!

God, I’d rather re-watch A Serbian Film or The Human Centipede than this. At least those were funny.

Kyou and Ryou subsequently get starfishes, and then Fuko essentially makes them perform glamour shots without a camera. Nagisa waxes lyrical about how they’re so beautiful, only for Tomoya to note that they’re a gorilla and hamster on the inside. Kyou quickly throws a star in his face for being a cunt, and quickly defends its usage to Fuko as being “object of great offensive power.” She quickly goes “A flying starfish… IT’S POSSIBLE!”

Thank God, that’s over. Now Fuko starts walking down the halls and meets a girl she talked to at the school entrance ceremony. She hands a starfish to her, but is rejected because exams supersede all sappy affairs.

Feeling crushed, Fuko laments how she never actually went to a class. Wait, why hasn’t a teacher kicked you out yet for excessive truancy and general incompetence? And where the hell are any of the teachers? Are you seriously telling me that this girl has been wandering through the school without at least one adult going, “The hell are you doing here? Go to class or get your ass out.”

But being Clannad, this lapse in logic isn’t even touched upon. And instead, the gang decides to arrange a faux-class for Fuko to have. As always, they find an empty classroom, and get Mrs. Furukawa since any actual teachers have been swallowed up by the cracks in time. They could’ve gotten Ms. Ibuki, but drama has forbidden it.

And during roll call, we get this example of a dub being too faithful.

“My name is Youhei Sunohara. Sunohara is written with a ‘spring’ and a ‘field’.”

Yeah, Sentai Filmworks, you know some of the audience watching this probably won’t know what that’s supposed to mean? Couldn’t you have him say something like “Sunohara is Japanese for ‘spring field”? Not only would that make more sense to casual fans, but it would also be a nod to another of Greg Ayres’ roles, thereby satisfying the more meticulous dub fans.

But no, you insist on the viewers to find out what the kanji used for Sunohara is in order to understand what he’s talking about.

Kyou immediately calls Sunohara an idiot, though Mrs. Furukawa consoles him by saying “It’s his energy. It covers his idiocy.”

Nagisa soon whines about how the boys aren’t taking a make-believe class seriously. But after being asked to be class leader for her anal-retentiveness, she instead picks Fuko to do it. And to open the rounds, she states, “My name is Fuko Isogai, and I like starfish.” It’s sounds as dumb as you think it is.

Mrs. Furukawa then gives her the bedroom eyes and talks about how everybody should get along. And before the finger-painting can begin, Fuko’s first actions as class leader are to make everybody bow and stand up.

Between that, there’s a random shot of Hitler sitting at a table outside the school. Yeah, I know. Just go with it.

As Fuko is writing on the chalkboard, Tomoya muses to himself about how “she’s a little different, but she still seems like an ordinary girl.”

My good sir, I bring about the question as to what your view of an ordinary girl is!

To close it off, the only relative positive thing I can say about this episode was that the soundtrack was good, though unfitting. Otherwise, I need to refill my anti-depressants. Hope you like the next entry! I know I won’t.

Ludovico Trials: X-Men Anime (2/12)

2011-07-25T20:37:00.002-04:00

Hokay, episode two... you can do this.

So the episode starts with the baddies’ lair—one with some kind of mechanical implants, while the other slightly more human (though still rather Afro Samurai-esque in design).

Back with the X-Men, the gang is riding in the blackbird, while Beast explains to the rest his concept of having created a portable Cerebro. Wait... portable... cerebro. Alright, so you’re telling me that the mutant-locating device that requires not just a capable psychic but also (apparently) a whole sector of a room in a frikkin’ mansion to use has been reduced to being used by a blue furry feet-for-hands mutant. Even if I did accept that, the fact that it looks like a Nook just pisses me off for some reason. And the reason for Beast even making such a thing in the first place? Eh, something about double checking whether or not there are really mutants in Japan or not—I was already lacking the attention span to read the subs all the way.

So once the X-Men land and meet up with the parents of the abducted mutant, they essentially plot dump everything: stuff about over 20 mutant disappearances, but the normal humans not really caring either way to report all of them. It should also be noted that the parents apparently own quite the bit of land, since they invite the X-Men to their estate filled with the works... cuz y’know, that’s totally how ordinary Japanese families function an’ stuff. Though I guess the family’s affluence makes sense since they were able to call on the damn X-Men to help solve this case.

It’s suggested that the U-Men—mad scientists out to exploit mutant powers for the sake of their own power—are the root of the cause (such a jump to conclusions is a lot more believable than the portable Cerebro) and the odd couple of Wolverine and Cyclops travel to town to further investigate. They question a local shop-owner, who talks of one of the younger workers having gone missing. Though, also being quite the anti-mutant, he starts going off on this rant about “muties” and all that... until he notices Cyclops clenching his fist. The man was comfortable enough to smack-talk mutants and yet was sensitive enough to realize that he struck a nerve solely based on Cyclops clenching his fist? These humans... I tell ya.

Investigating the area of the disappearances (Wolverine and Cyclops via motorcycles, Beast and Storm via truck), both parties are suddenly attacked by the same Afro Samurai robots that attacked the girl the previous episode. Now, I wouldn’t have that big of a problem with these hordes of robots if they didn’t have the same variation as a third-party SNES game.

Not only do we have robots whose camera tech was too good to be installed directly into its eyes or anywhere else convenient (it looks like they have to eject part of their head to get a clear shot... here’s to hoping it’s at least Canon quality), but we also have:

...robots on motorcycles

... and robots with lightsabers.

I get that in other things like Star Wars, there are “pre-boss” types of baddies like droids with a variety of weaponry (riding “insert random space vehicle,” wielding a laser gun, uh... wielding a different laser gun) but to see it here... I dunno, it just seemed wrong to me. And to make matters worse, the X-Men actually have a hard time fending them off. It isn’t until Wolverine tells Cyclops to get his head in the game that the tables even start to turn.

Following the battle, Beast reports to Professor X back at the Institute, telling him of their suspicions of the U-Men’s involvement. The professor merely suggests confirmation of the U-Men’s involvement, mentioning how the U-Men hunt down mutants for the use of their organs. Alright, so not only are we dealing with potential pedo-bears, but they’re also black market... but for themselves, so I guess black self-market? I dunno. U-Men.

The gang eventually finds an abandoned hospital, remember what they’ve read on TVTropes and figured the bad guys must be close by. It’s not too long before they run into their next obstacle: a hideously deformed test subject, begging for his pain to stop. He then bulks up a la Batman’s Bane and attacks. While the others gladly engage, Cyclops takes a closer look and realizes that the monster is actually the kidnapped boy the local shop-owner was talking about... solely based on the earring he was wearing. Okay, I can accept reaching that conclusion based on his full-on outfit, but by his earring? Let’s just assume that Cyclops has some kind of other mutation that’s too mundane to even talk about and move on.

Cyclops insists that they save this helpless victim, but Beast uses his tech to analyze the boy’s condition, concluding that his body has been warped beyond any help. Hearing this, Cyclops finally eye-beams the kid to death, finishing the fight instantly. So I get that Cyclops’ eye-beams are powerful, but the extent that this series uses them as an equalizer in fights is just ridiculous... and it’s only been two episodes. Whatever. In classic anime style, the boy is just alive enough to give the X-Men a dying wish to save the others that have been kidnapped. It would honestly be pretty moving if I hadn’t seen it done to death a million times prior.

Being so scarred from having killed a helpless boy, Cyclops again decides to hinder the plot from progressing, the others more than likely holding in their annoyance... well, except for Wolverine, who straightup punches the guy. He follows up his hit with a little pep talk, talking about how the leader of the X-Men must put his feelings aside for the sake of his team and the mission at hand before offering his own literal hand to literally get him back up when he’s down. Two things: 1) Wolverine being the voice of encouragement to someone that isn’t Rogue just feels wrong, and 2) I have no idea why someone else take on the title of leader, since ol’ Cy is clearly too emotionally unstable for such a strenuous job.

Ugh... anyway, they continue onward throughout the building (without a killer robot in sight... or anything else for that matter. 12 episode series, don’cha know.) until they reach a number of vessels—the first they find containing the kidnapped girl Hisako, and the other containing the well-endowed Emma Frost.

Two episodes in, and I’ve already spotted more Afro Samurai comparisons than I care for... and not enough of the Samuel L. Jackson variety. Geez... why am I watching this, again?

Ludovico Trials: X-Men Anime (1/12)

2011-07-21T20:09:00.003-04:00

When it was announced that Madhouse and Marvel were buddying up to make a line of Marvel anime, I’m sure I wasn’t the only one filled with fanboy glee. In particular, I was pumped about the Iron Man and X-Men anime. One episode into the series, however, and I was automatically turned off by Iron Man. Though I guess considering the other possibility of a show showing promise only to fail later in the game, Iron Man came out on top.

Such is the problem I had with the X-Men anime, starting off with the typical elements of an X-Men series only for me to start losing interest halfway through.

The series starts with an epic fight between the X-Men and one of their own—the psychic Jean Grey apparently having lost control of her powers and burning a conveniently barren wasteland-ish type of area. While members Beast, Storm and Wolverine are doing their best to fend off her attacks, boyfriend Cyclops is having a particularly difficult time accepting the fact that his lady-friend has just gone bat-shit insane.

Now, I’m not the biggest of X-Men fans, but I do know that it is a universal constant that Scott “Cyclops” Summers is one of the least likeable characters in the franchise, coming off as an uncooperative little punk due to one thing or another. Such remains true for this version of the series.

Unhindered by the sudden god-mode of his gf, Scott blindly throws himself into the fray-iest of fray, getting as close as possible to Jean to try and talk some sense into her. Pretty admirable if it was anyone else... but it’s not, so I was kinda glad when the mind-controlled Jean flicks him aside like a particularly difficult booger.

One year passes since the battle with the now deceased Jean and it looks like the X-Men have had a falling out... again. Okay, such a plot trait has been used in so many other series (the latest TMNT movie, Wolverine and the X-Men) that seeing it again with the X-Men, as sensible of an idea as it seems, just comes off as rather trite. So, the school’s been disbanded with headmaster Charles Xavier having nightmares about crying orphans and one particular child whose mind he cannot read. Y’know, typical Charles Xavier stuff.

The other X-Men are also out and about living their separate lives: Wolverine off traveling, Storm on a relaxing boat ride (with exception to pirates), and Beast teaching students alongside a talking squid... it’s actually cooler than it sounds. The only person seeming to hate all this sudden down-time is Scott, who’s apparently still moping around the battle area where Jean died. Now, while I completely understand where Scott is coming from, coming from the perspective of the viewer, Scott is being a complete and total hindrance to the plot, simply refusing to get over himself and get on with his life. He’s very much like the one kid in your carpool that always forgets to use the bathroom like the inconsiderate ass he is.

Exact details as to what happened to the students of the Xavier Institute completely thrown aside, the episode continues with Charles summoning the rest on a mission of a missing child. With some insistence from Storm, who plays the “it’s what Jean would have wanted” card that Scott finally realizes that the series apparently can’t just leave him be, finally joining the others. The mission: apparently the entirety of Japan is cut off from Charles’ mutant detecting device, Cerebro. Rather than assuming that Japan just happens to be a mutant-free zone and calling it a day, Charles assumes some shenanigans must be up that are blocking Cerebro in that particular region of the world. Matters are only worsened when an acquaintance (read: “not friend”) in Japan has had his daughter kidnapped by robot-design rejects from Afro Samurai.

Being such the good person he is, Charles sends out his X-Men to Japan to get to the bottom of things.

A pretty good episode in general that shows some promise for the remaining 11 episodes in its run. So what could have gone wrong? Well, that’s what I’m forcing myself to try and find out these next couple days. Hopefully my eyes won’t pop out due to excessive rolling from anything an uncooperative Scott does in later episodes. Heaven forbid I be unable to finish watching.

Ludovico Trials: Kicking Clannad in the Nads (Part 4) by Dr. Insomniac

2011-07-19T22:33:00.003-04:00

Episode 4: Let’s Find a Better Show.

After getting called in by the announcer, Nagisa is told that since drama club is on hiatus, all activities involving it are forbidden, and that includes the simple act of putting up posters. Tomoya attacks an inanimate object with his fist again and asks her why she was such a doormat, with which she says, “Rules are rules, and they can’t be bent.” After a few seconds of angst, the two decide to go “screw it, we’re gonna go build our own drama club.” Fifty bucks says it won’t have blackjack or hookers.

And just a few feet away from them, the fool’s pariah stares menacingly.

At Sunohara’s place, Tomoya decides to seduce blondie into the drama club with the promise of pastries. The morning after, round 4 begins as Sunohara asks Tomoyo for her breasts due to some stupid “fake breast” joke he uses to see whether or not she’s got a bigger schlong than him.

To everyone’s surprise, Tomoyo does indeed pull two fake breasts out of her shirt, as her voice suddenly deepens and the two boys slowly discover a bulge on the supposed lass’s skirt. Sunohara starts going through an existential crisis over how he’s been beaten again and again by a drag queen, while Tomoya starts narrating on how his sexuality has become questioned by this… Oh, whom am I kidding? She beats the fuck out of him. End scene.

And this time, it appears that Sunohara actually got injuries this time. Though it’s only bandages, when that amount of kicks should have sent our dear pansy straight into the hospital. Of course, that probably would’ve led to a sappy plot about Tomoya learning how not to take his friends for granted or some sugary shit like that. Sunohara or crappy coma subplot? Quite the Catch-22 there.

Green-haired girl appears and calls for Tomoya’s—or in her own words, “Weird guy’s”—help. She also calls Sunohara “Double weird guy” since his hair is an impossible color, and because blondness is such an alien concept in Japan. Yet green hair is fine and dandy there.

Outside, right by a giant water fountain—because this school is prestigious enough to have that while simultaneously undemanding enough to have empty classrooms—green-haired girl talks to Tomoya about all the stars she’s been making. Apparently, these things are supposed to be invitations to her sister’s wedding. And she wants our protagonist’s help in spreading them throughout the school. Tomoya shrugs it off, giving the reasonable explanation that he doesn’t know a fuck about Fuko (despite the fact that he just blurts out her name even though she never actually said it on-screen) and he could care less about giving out invitations.

Then Fuko creams herself out of nowhere. Yeah.

Tomoya decides to put a juice box straw up her nose, and ends up getting pissed that she didn’t drink any. Uh, Tomoya, if you’re going to poison her while she least suspects it, pull out a fucking syringe instead of using a supposed juice box. Gimmicks are long over, man. It’s the practical toxin that counts.

Wait, you weren’t trying to kill her? Oh, well.

Tomoya decides to ask Tomoyo if she wants to go the wedding. Her response basically amounts to “Uh, no.” Then she kicks Sunohara. Sunohara gets up and tries to bring her into the boy’s room, which leads to him flying out the window. Tomoyo gets a fit about all these Sunohara moments, until being told by Tomoya that blondie thinks she’s a he. She angsts over how people consider her a bully instead of a girl, which frankly doesn’t show at all because she only has two facial expressions.

After that, Tomoya talks to Nagisa while she eats a sponge or something. Seriously, her mouth is smaller than that bite. What? Does she nibble at it like a hamster?

As the two ponder about how to get people join the drama club, Sunohara pops in. Why does this episode have more footage of a pussy than most hentai? It’s not like Sunohara’s an integral part of the story arc.

His first proposition is “BEAT ‘EM UP!” But prudes write this show, so that quickly gets thrown out.

As he grows bored that nothing’s happening, Tomoya starts imagining the show as an RPG, which he laments as making things too simple. What in Azathoth’s name is simpler than trying to start up a goddamn club?

So the three decide to stalk Kyou and Ryou as they play with their Swinub. Not wanting an ensuing bitch fit, they pick Ryou and ask her to help out in getting the club going. They meet up at the roof of the school, since instead of just talking at an empty classroom, they have to adhere to the rules set up by Torchwood and Batman and talk on a roof to amplify the bravado or whatever film term I’m supposed to use.

Ryou gets startled at the fact that a girl is talking to her. For no reason other then to titillate our viewers at home, bait and switch Yuri happens. Crappy, upbeat porn music starts playing while Nagisa and Ryou hold hands, with roses covering the backgrounds. What’s weird is that Ryou actually seems to want it.

After realizing that there’s no Yuri and it’s just the two talking about the club, Kyou barges in and gets pissed at how her sister’s been ridiculed. She grabs both Tomoya and Sunohara into a chokehold, and then yells out something that sounds like she’s shitting her panties, which isn’t helped by the random Swinub going “Poo-ee!”

At yet another vacant classroom, the five get together to formally talk about starting the drama club. Kyou wonders why exactly these two guys are being friends with Nagisa, being one of the few moments where the feeling’s mutual. She then asks Tomoya whether or not he’s planning to make Nagisa go down on him. But since the show needs to tell us about the rules when it comes to starting up this extracurricular embolism, this quickly gets interrupted by Ryou explaining how a club needs at least 3 members and an advisor. Kyou notices how they already have the required amount, until Sunohara and Tomoya moan that they aren’t into theatrics.

The day after, Sunohara decides that he likes getting kicked in the dick and tries to woo Tomoyo into going out with him. He takes some pick-up lines from Tomoya, and they result in another visit from DEM LEGS. It turns out that the damage was so grievous that they had to blur out his face. Of course, this show can’t kill anyone off unless the rule of melodrama says so, so none if this will affect either him or the show at large.

Taking advantage of the aftermath, Tomoya tries to goad Tomoyo into getting into the drama club with the promise of “feminine clothes”. But she’s busy with the elections for student council chairman, which Tomoya mutters to himself a few times like a lobotomy patient.

Then he goes to the library and finds Kotomi reading books while satisfying the foot fetish demographic. It takes at least several tries to get her to listen to him, to which she replies, “…huh?” after realizing there’s somebody next to her. Then we get this exchange:

“You can call me Kotomi-chan.”
“At least let me drop the ‘chan’ will ya?”

Oh cool, Sentai Filmworks learned its lesson. But later after a failed invitation and some waddling…

“Tomoya… kun.”

I said that too early, didn’t I?

Tomoya and Nagisa sit out again while lamenting on how nobody wants to go to drama club. They decide the best answer is to get the sophomores to join. And since they only know one sophomore, they go to Fuko.

Fuko quickly refuses, going on about how she makes stars all the time, even from morning to night. After a few questions, the two find out that she never goes home. She just sits there making stars, ever since getting hit by a car. Another question leads them to find out that Fuko’s the sister of Nagisa’s teacher, who Nagisa knows to be going to the hospital all the time to see a relative. And with that talk of the ghost from a couple episodes ago… Fuck. This is our first arc of the show?

Moral of the episode: Cars are the natural menace to all cherished family members. Don’t want your little sister out in the open, when she could be inside making sammiches and offering some sweet imouto love, do ya?

But seriously, I’m going to need entire stadiums filled with Jack and Morgan for the looming moe.

A Year of Disney's Shorts: Set 6- by Avaitor

2011-07-13T18:24:00.003-04:00

Sorry this is so late, but between the list and things going on in my life, I haven't had the time to update this series. Here's my monthly set.

Hawaiian Holiday (1937)

This actually showed up twice in my calendar this month, and it’s one of the few cartoons so far that I have a clear memory of watching as a child. Numerous times, in fact. I distinctly remember going to one of the hotels at the Walt Disney World resort, and having them play this cartoon on a big-screen TV. That was a good time.

The story of the cartoon is pretty basic, since it just lives u p to the title. Mickey and the gang chill out in Hawaii, in typical cartoony fashion. Goofy tries to surf, but fails miserably. Mickey tries to play the ukulele, but gets his fingers stuck, while the rest of the gang find their own antics.

Overall, it’s a cute cartoon. Nothing too special, but there are some classic music cues and a few gags worth writing home about. I’ve seen this cartoon a lot of times in my life, and it’s still one of my favorites featuring Mickey and his pals. And the ending is precious.

Orphan’s Benefit (1934)

In this short, Mickey runs a show for a local batch of orphans, which Donald attempts to steal for his own. This is what happens when you give him a standing ovation for reciting children’s poetry…

I think that this cartoon is fairly basic overall. Light on laughs and story, but makes up for that with great animation. The attention to visual wordplay is stunning, and Donald isn’t the only one to have some truly fluid stuff go on. All the other supporting characters in the cartoon, like Goofy and Clara Cluck, have their shining moments as well during their parts of the show. It’s just a shame that the rest of the cartoon is fairly forgettable.

Playful Pluto (1934)

Pluto lives up to the title of the cartoon in this one. After a bath, Pluto goes on a mini-rampage and ends up swallowing a lightbulb. Scared out of his life, he runs all around Mickey’s house.

The animation in this short is surprisingly rubbery. Disney has traditionally tried to have its cartoon characters stick to model, which makes how bouncy Pluto looks throughout seem surprising. That makes for some funny animation, however, which is a good thing. The rest of the cartoon is somewhat basic stuff, with Pluto being his playful pup self. There’s nothing wrong with that, and some good laughs are present, but it’s a tad hollow overall.

Summer Anime 2011 Clusterfuck - Part 1

2011-07-12T11:24:00.019-04:00

Not unlike a disgusting mass of countless maggots, the Clusterfuck has expanded since the spring. Evolved. It swells with decaying flesh and the thick stench of rigor mortis; anime is a horse killed long ago, one which continues to be beaten long after decomposition by Japanese studios shoveling out as many terrible comedies, fanservice extravaganzas, and lolicon incest fantasies as possible. Has the blistering heat of the summer improved things, or has the rot managed to envelop everything in its path? Find out in the first ever multi-part Anime Clusterfuck, as Dr. Insomniac, Desensitized, Avaitor, Ensatsu-ken, and yours truly each explore their own set of TV shows in separate articles!

----------

Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu Ni!

And this scene is one of them.

I find it hard to believe that enough people liked Baka to Test to warrant a second season. And yet, here we are. All the generic characters are back to test your endurance once again, and fanservice abounds when the first episode is the obligatory beach episode! It’d be easier to list the things I liked about this episode than the ones I didn’t. The OP is pretty fun to watch and I chuckled at one or two jokes. That’s it. Most of the humor is extremely obvious and falls flat on its face, the characters are neither interesting nor appealing, and the animation seems halfhearted. For a comedy, Baka to Test 2 is boring as shit, rehashing bad jokes from other anime at every possible instance using characters that completely and utterly lack charm.

At least KyoAni’s shit actually tries. 2/10

Blood-C

This actually looks stupider in motion.

They aren’t exactly popular, and they certainly aren’t masterpieces, but I’m definitely a fan of Blood: The Last Vampire and its sister TV series, Blood+. The latter’s introduction didn’t really leave a good first impression, but it interested me enough in the universe and characters to give it a chance and continue watching. Blood-C, on the other hand, left me with no desire to check out the next episode. That isn’t to say it’s bad – because it’s not – but it certainly felt disposable and perhaps a bit immature. One thing I was disappointed about is that this is anything but the same Saya from the previous two anime. Here, she comes across as dorky instead of cool (especially in the scene where she sings), something completely reinforced by her truly awful character design.

CLAMP has definitely toned things down for this series (none of the designs are as heinous as anything in Code Geass), but it’s still pretty clear who did the character art; ergo, the only way to tell the men from the women is the presence of breasts. The school scenario plot is relatively standard (not one, but TWO guys are obviously in love with our heroine), and the action-focused nighttime stuff seems a bit underdeveloped. I must compliment Production I.G. on their animation, however, which is quite fluid and makes for a great fight scene near the end of the episode. And yes, it is bloody. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a stone statue bleed that much in my entire life.

Honestly, you’d be better off watching Blood+ again. And if you’ve never seen it before, then now is as good a time as any to jump in. Take my word for it, it’s a lot of fun and certainly much better than this show. Blood-C isn’t awful, but by no means is it memorable. 5/10

The iDOLM@STER

A fair critique of this shit stain.

I’m a big fan of the mockumentary style. Man Bites Dog is one of my favorite movies of all time; it’s not just disturbing and terrifying, it’s also hilarious and witty. The iDOLM@STER is no Man Bites Dog. Hell, it’s not even Paranormal Activity. It’s fucking August Underground’s Mordum. Every minute – nay, every second – of this atrocious documentary-esque first episode is downright painful to endure. The jokes are terrible, the characters are obnoxious, and the plot is nonexistent. Really, the only thing necessary to say about this series is that it’s basically on the same level as Kiba and Umineko. It’s so horrendous that I legitimately thought about turning it off around the 12 minute mark.

Fun fact: the idols are all underage. Like, middle school underage. There’s even a scene in which one of them says, “I’m in ninth grade. Oh, and I have big boobs!” This is directly after a close-up shot of a hamster crawling down her shirt while one of the other girls comments on her bust size. Brilliant. As stated earlier, none of the characters are likable. They’re all supposed to be cute in some way, but each one is either annoying or simply retarded. The crocodile and pig are probably the cutest creatures in the show.

I hate myself for watching this, and I hate you if you like it. 1/10

Kaitou Tenshi Twin Angel: Kyun Kyun Tokimeki Paradise!!

Mortified.

I’ll admit, I enjoyed the first 30 seconds of this show. The whole mafia vegetable theft thing was just stupid enough to be humorous, and I hoped that the rest of the episode would be as fun. It wasn’t. The grating voice acting and generic EVERYTHING really killed it for me, not that I even have an interest in the magical girl genre in the first place. To be fair, this show’s target audience appears to be 5-10 year old girls, and the ages of the characters seem to reflect that. While there is an overabundance of downright creepy fanservice, Twin Angel doesn’t really strike me as pedo-bait like certain other series of its ilk. This show was clearly not aimed at people my age or gender, and the ludicrous antics of the butler got a couple of shameful laughs out of me, so I can’t really say it was terrible.

This series is obviously meant for children, and in that regard, I don’t think I can give it a fair score. Since I doubt anyone under the age of 13 is reading this article, I’ll just say that you should probably avoid watching it.

Kami-sama no Memo-chou

Surely a debilitating disease.

This is certainly a strange series in more ways than one, not the least of which being the surprising level of competence displayed by JC Staff – a company known for churning out low rent work on shoestring budgets – in the art/animation department. While it blatantly copies its sense of style from shows like Durarara!!, it does so with care and, hey, at least it chose something good to take inspiration from. The high production values definitely go a long way; the OP is awesome and attention-grabbing while the soundtrack is fun enough to keep you focused.

This series follows a NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training) detective and her posse of weird-but-likable similarly unemployed fellows as they solve mysteries in an unconventional way. The first episode’s story stays consistently interesting throughout, and the double-length premiere (the first time I’ve ever seen an anime episode with an hour runtime!) never feels overlong or too drawn out. Unfortunately, the characters don’t fare as well as the plot or concept. Narumi seems like a good guy, but he’s too much of a pushover to carry an anime like this. Despite having a couple of fairly witty lines, Alice fucking sucks and I wanted her dead by the end of the episode. The other characters have their good points, but are kind of boring overall – I can certainly see them improving over the course of the series, though.

It definitely has potential, and I’m feeling nice today, so I’ll give Kami-sama no Memo-chou a cautious recommendation. 7.5/10

Morita-san wa Mukuchi

When you are watching anime, focus your eyes on the screen and listen properly to the audio until the episode ends.

I don’t really have anything to say about this show. The episodes are apparently shorter than many Newgrounds cartoons and... nothing actually happened. I kind of liked Mayu (the series’ titular Morita-san), since the first episode made her out to be a detached cynic incapable of feeling empathy for other humans, but according to MAL’s character description, she’s just someone who thinks too much before speaking and thus doesn’t talk often. Sounds kind of boring, actually.

There’s no real point to watching this. 3/10

Natsume Yuujinchou San

A cat of fine taste.

I was completely surprised by this show. I had never seen any of the first two seasons and what I’d heard about it didn’t make it sound like my kind of series, but it is with great joy that I deliver this verdict: Natsume Yuujinchou 3 is excellent and by far the best anime of the season. There isn’t much to dislike about this show; Takashi is a very likable protagonist, the animation clearly had a lot of effort put into it, the music is quite nice overall, and the writing is seemingly heartfelt. The plot is fairly unique; Takashi is a fairly special guy in that he can see otherworldly demons, but instead of beating the shit out of them like you’d probably expect, he actually helps them with their problems and often befriends them. He’s an all-around good guy (and has a wonderful voice actor) with an awesome guardian spirit/cat-that-turns-into-a-wolf nicknamed Nyanko. Together, they star in an anime that is as relaxing as it is enthralling – an impressive feat. I can’t recommend this show enough, and will definitely be looking into watching the first two seasons very soon.

This book of friends is one you definitely want to open. 9/10

Usagi Drop

Just wait ‘til you see who he’s talking about.

Wow. I can’t say I expected to see such a lovely show this season. I’d rather not talk about the story since I don’t want to spoil the first episode for anyone, but I must commend everybody involved in this excellent production. Daikichi is an awesome protagonist, a great guy and easy to relate to, and I feel as if – by series’ end – Rin will end up being just as likable and intriguing, if not more so. The first two and a half minutes have beautiful art and animation; it looks like a storybook come to life. Truly, one of the few disappointing things about this episode is the fact that it drops this style in favor of something more standard once the OP hits. Only time will tell if Usagi Drop stays consistent through the entirety of its run (there’s definitely potential for it to go downhill from here), but this first episode is absolutely refreshing and certainly worth a look.

Anime of such quality and vision don’t come around often. It would be a mistake to let this one pass you by. 9/10

-- Foggle

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 14: Shows That Didn't Make It

2011-07-10T12:16:00.002-04:00

*General*

There is a wide scope of shows that did not make the list for very specific reasons, be they because they all follow the same formula, or because of the time period this list was made in. A few of these were considered for inclusion on the list but for one reason or another, simply didn't make it in. Keep in mind that just because they didn't make the final list and are instead here is not because they are objectively inferior (for the most part), but because they did not compare to the rest of the list in our opinion.

Shows we haven't seen
Examples: Mysterious Cities Of Gold, Legend of the Galactic Heroes
We can't rank what we haven't seen and we can't have seen it all. We're only human. Yeah, some of you more cultured animation fans will wonder why neither of these shows are on the list. We can't blame you. However, the truth is that none of us have seen Mysterious Cities of Gold, and only Insomniac's watched all of Legend of the Galactic Heroes and in all honesty, we do eventually plan to correct this gross injustice. But alas, don't take us as close-minded for not scouring through more obscure fare. We'll be sure to watch the above two and plenty of other under-appreciated classics once we have the time to do so.

Various short-lived shows/OVAs
Examples: FLCL, Clerks
Yes, they're good, yes they're fun. No, they don't really have any lasting impact.

Your 80s nostalgic favorites
Examples: GI Joe, Thundercats, Transformers G1... etc.
These are all formulaic, poorly written and animated, and have aged exceedingly poorly. They have no place on a list such as this.

Too soon to rank
Examples: My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, Sym-Bionic Titan, Young Justice, Archer
The recent cartoon seasons were home to many new shows, many of which were unique and a breath of fresh air. Unfortunately, they couldn't all make it right now, but who knows what the future will hold? We might have new contenders for our list in the coming years, but these shows are too new to compete directly with proven classics.

Fleischer Studio's Output
When you get down to it, these were some of the best cartoons of all time. The Talkartoons had the surreality and charm of Disney's Silly Symphonys while relying on more than just cutting-edge animation techniques to captivate audiences. Betty Boop and Popeye were and are still two of the most popular cartoon characters ever, and had strong enough casts in their shorts to make Mickey and the gang seem boring by comparison. And the Superman shorts were among the first successful attempts at adapting a major super hero character, and their Technicolor bliss were a big inspiration for action cartoons for years on, with Bruce Timm's Batman and Superman series in particular taking good notes.

These cartoons deserve to be seen by fans of animation all over, but we didn't rank them on since the shorts have never really aired on TV together, unlike the Looney Tunes, or even MGM's stuff, like in Down With Droopy D from Cartoon Network in the 90's. For a lot of fans, we had to rely on public domain releases to see a fair share of these, while from our time, Popeye and Superman shorts would only air sparingly on TV. We also feel like cartoons like these deserve to be ranked elsewhere, and we might do something akin to Avaitor's Disney posts later, not just for Fleischer, but for other studios like Lantz and UPA. Stick around for that.

Modern Cartoon Network Comedies
Examples: The Marvelous Misadventures Of Flapjack, Regular Show, Adventure Time, Chowder, Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends
Here we have some fun shows, each with a following outside the main demographic. Are they funny? To some people. To others, they're more akin to headaches, and are a little harder to get into than the early Cartoon Network originals, which were made for everyone and hit a wide range of fans. These shows tend to be preferred by children in the demographic and slightly-older viewers that think these series are "edgy and better than the crap on Nick and Disney". We've tried the Cartoon Network test on our parents and other people around that age, and while the older Cartoon Cartoons tested fairly well on them, the more recent shows got weaker results. Not to mention that the older fans that gravitate towards these shows seem to go away before they end, and they tend to lower in quality significantly around then, and even the few who stay before they end forget about their current favorites for whatever CN just came out with. We considered putting a couple of series on here, but the more recent ones are too new and likely to follow that trend, while the older ones haven't aged as well as we'd like them to.

*Action*

Explosions! Carnage! Ohmandidyouseethat?! Yes, there have been a lot of brilliant action shows over the years and deciding on the best of the best was tough work! So tough in fact that we were still trying to cut some of these shows late into the list's life. While we feel the best of the best were chosen for our list, here are a few other contenders that just barely managed to make our list for various reasons of their own.

Wolverine & The X-Men
Wolvie was this close to making the list, but lost due to only lasting one season and ultimately not doing as much in its run as Evolution did in its. We still would have left it in if Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes didn't finish its first season while we were still doing this, and accomplished more with its characters than W&TXM did. Not to mention that we already had an X-Men show on here, and there wasn't too much of a major distinction between them as opposed to with Batman: TAS and Brave & the Bold. Good show, but we just had better options.

90s Spider-Man/X-Men
Both of these were childhood favorites for a few of the AR staff members and even helped us to get into the characters. Watching them again though, they just don't hold up that well. Poor animation, weak voice acting given out by solid performers, lame censorship, and half-assed attempts at some of the comics' best stories, these shows were outclassed by Batman: TAS then and by later X-Men and Spider-Man shows since their arrival. Even then, they're still among the best Marvel cartoons of the 90's. Remember Avengers: United They Stand and the first seasons of Iron Man and Fantastic Four? Yeah, same.

Samurai Jack
Genndy Tartakovsky is a much beloved figure here at the AR, as you can see by how high Dexter's Laboratory ranked on our list. Sym-Bionic Titan was another big favorite of ours, and we all thought his Clone Wars series was the best part of the Star Wars prequels. But Samurai Jack is collectively our least favorite show from his arsenal, and because of this it does not make the list. The show has a good sense of style and direction (trademarks of Tartakovsky), but the whole product rings a little forced to us. Unlike Sym-Bionic Titan or Dexter's Laboratory, once you get past the brilliant shell, you find that the core of the show just really isn't all that special or engaging. Jack is a boring character, the world he inhabits feels empty and lifeless, and beyond the action nothing really ever happens in the show. Don't get us wrong, it's a good show when all is said and done, but its missing that extra touch necessary to rank among his better works and to rank on this list.

Macross (by extension Robotech)
Another classic that just missed making the list during the initial selection. Of all the classic candidates from this genre, Macross is considered second only to the original Gundam in influence and believe us, by all means deserves a placement on a list such as this. Unfortunately, we felt it just wasn't enough to make our list in the end, but feel vindicated in the fact that it almost did.

Dragon Ball Z & One Piece
I'm sure we'll no doubt get a ton of heat for not ranking some of the most popular shonen of all time on our list. Now, to be fair, its not that we think any of these particular titles suck or that their overall stories themselves haven't aged well or anything like that. I myself highly enjoy Eichiro Oda's deservingly popular manga One Piece, and many of us at AR have enjoyed DBZ for what it is (and yes, we have watched the series with its original voice acting in Japanese and its original soundtrack). The main problem that keeps these titles from being proper material from our list can be summed up in one word: Toei. Whether you like the adaptations on the whole or not, it just can't be denied that Toei blatantly subjects these adaptations to extremely cheap budget animation for a majority of each series, slows their plots down with horrible pacing (often-times dragging out small portions of the respective manga to last entire episodes), and while each series has its strengths through some great voice acting and fantastic musical scores, it ultimately isn't enough to save them from all of the other things that Toei does wrong with them in the long-run. The fact of the matter is that we have to look at the bigger picture when judging these shows for a list such as this. For a show to rank on our list, one of its key requirements is that it must be easily accessible to a wide variety of people in terms of being something that most people would want to invest their time in. With the pacing that these shows go at, we highly doubt that we could convince most people to watch either anime when both take multiple episodes to get out a single plot point or fight that most series could finish in the span of half an episode. So, we aren't denying that these adaptations do have some great moments of brilliance, but the problem lies in how much boredom one has to slog through to get to those moments.

Fist Of The North Star
One of the most important shonen there is, but unfortunately, it just missed the mark of making our list due to the excess of padding, wildly fluctuating animation quality, and for being a bit too formulaic overall in most episodes. A great show, yes, but not one we could rank over others for much the same reasoning as other shonen favorites like DBZ or One Piece.

Teen Titans
Wow. We didn’t expect anybody to question why this wasn’t on the list, so it became quite a surprise to see this as one of the most anticipated. For reasons as to why it’s not on here, we just didn’t like it. Not just because of personal taste, but simply due to it being objectively bad. None of the characters developed much throughout the five seasons. The Terra arc was badly paced and expected us to care about a character who only appeared for a couple episodes before becoming a antagonist. Seasons 3 and 4 ended on Deus ex Machinas. And aside from Slade, none of the villains had any sort of menace to them (looking at you, Brother Blood). Whatever comedy it was trying to go for has been thoroughly trumped with Brave and the Bold, while whatever teen drama it was trying pull is being better executed through Weisman’s hands. Really, the only thing that show had going for it was how it tried to go for an Gainaxesque animation route instead of the conformity laid down by Bruce Timm (a Timmformity if you will). Aside from that, it was just kind of forgettable.

Ghost In The Shell: Stand Alone Complex
This is a great show, filled with complex plotting, interesting philosophy (though not nearly as much as in the movies or manga), and memorable characters. So why, then, did it not make the list? Truth be told, this is simply because it is a very divisive series; even more so than Evangelion among the staff. To include Stand Alone Complex on our list would have meant dropping something else that everyone (or nearly everyone) agreed was worthy of being called one of the top 65 cartoons of all time, and after painstaking construction we realized that we had crafted a list no one here would have done any differently.

Other shonen series (Naruto, Bleach, Hitman Reborn, etc.)
No, we don't really have all that much against shonen series that focus on battles and the like (not all of us, anyways). However, aside from various pacing and filler problems akin to what was mentioned with One Piece, FOTNS, and DBZ, these series also have notably weaker stories on the whole, and when or if they do show some strengths, they are typically short-lived and each of them lack any form of consistency in terms of overall quality. If you like or enjoy any of these shonen series that we didn't rank on our list, then that's absolutely fine. That said, the reason they don't rank on our list is because we find that they lack quality altogether, and often succumb to the same general issues, ranging from generic and/or annoying characters to bland execution of their formulaic plots. They aren't necessarily bad or terrible, but they certainly aren't anything that stand out nearly enough to make a list such as this.

*Comedy*

Comedy was a bit harder to choose for our list. There were quite a few comedies that made the cut and were subsequently cut once more after review, it was a hard road for many of these shows. Comedy is a lot more subjective to judge than action can be, so if you feel offended that we didn't think your favorite comedy was all that funny, don't take it to hard. In any case, here are the most popular comedies that did not make our list because we felt they were either not funny, consistent, or original enough to make enough of an impact or fell just short of making the list.

Spongebob Squarepants
Though the first three seasons and the movie are quite enjoyable, everything after that just feels phoned-in and barely serviceable. And while The Simpsons also succumbed to such a fate, it at least managed to fight it off for around a decade. As much as some of us hold nostalgia towards the sponge, years of mediocrity and over-promotion by Nick haven't really endeared it to us in recent time.

The Venture Brothers
Though quite the interesting experience and unique parody of the Quest formula, what started off as a clever look into a unique world quickly turned in on itself and by the third season was no longer a thriving and developing world, but a string of in-jokes and winking nods to the fans killing a lot of its appeal in the process. We're not one to knock a show for having fanservice, but centering entire episodes (and seasons) around such shallow ideas makes the overall product suffer. The Venture Bros. suffers hard for how they changed the focus of the show, and it is that exact reason why it has not made the list.

Family Guy/American Dad
We understand that both shows are quite popular and deserve their followings, but in the grand scheme of things, we on the AR just staff prefer other comedies to Seth MacFarlane's sitcoms. It's kind of hard to make a full commitment with Family Guy when the show's entire purpose now is to use characters with next-to-no personality offend the audience as much as they can for a half hour, and while we appreciate American Dad for taking the initiative to use the Family Guy formula with more round characters, the cast ends up being either dull like Francine, useless like Hayley and Klaus, or borderline unbearable like Stan and Roger. There's also the severe lack of consistent quality in each show's output to guarantee them spots here. Both shows have some genuine laughs at least a couple of times an episode however, so we can say that we at least respect their efforts, unlike The Cleveland Show, which takes the worst qualities of both shows and just makes for an unpleasant experience.

Ren & Stimpy
About a season's worth of good episodes from the Spumco age + about less than a season's worth of good episodes from the Games age + nothing of merit from Adult Party Cartoon= one horribly inconsistent run. The good is still very good, but even that we're burnt out on. We just had better options than Ren & Stimpy.

Beavis & Butthead
Mike Judge's lovable metalheads have the right idea, being somewhat appealing morons who were able to make you laugh by poking fun of society and poking their butts at the same time. B&B has a lot of laughs in any given episode, but in terms of satire in animation, Judge's other show and its spin-off do it better and are overall superior shows to Beavis & Butthead. It's quality, but we had better options for the list.

Scooby-Doo
See: The 80s, except continuous over the past 40 years, a couple of odd highlights aside.

The Jetsons/Top Cat
Two of Hanna-Barbera's funniest originals, the former takes similar ideas from The Flintstones, keeps the class and wit of the early seasons, puts them in space, and makes for good times, while the latter ups the class and wit to a whole other level. They're fun shows that hold up fine, but only lasted a season each, didn't do make as much of an impact in the industry during their sole season as Jonny Quest did or are held in as high regard as Flintstones is. To be fair, The Jetsons has 2 additional seasons from the 80's... but the less said about those, the better.

Sheep In The Big City
Sheep came out around the peak of Cartoon Network, when the originals were still full of life and energy. While there was plenty of wit and love put into the show, it didn't last as long as Ed, Edd, n' Eddy or Powerpuff Girls nor left as much of an impression as Megas XLR, and when it comes to the best of the best, it just barely misses that cut. We still highly recommend it if you're a fan of these shows, however. It holds up about as well as any of them.

Kim Possible
Wait, why did Jake Long make it into the list, but not Kim Possible? We appreciate both shows and think that KP did a fair amount right, but rewatching both shows, Kim doesn't really hold up as well as we remembered. The first season is good enough, but eventually the quirks that made the show fun at first became tiresome. Kim's perfection, Ron's stupidity, Drakken's incapability to do a thing without Shego, and Rufus's existence in general became old before long. Not to mention that the last season existed solely for fanservice, like bringing Team Go back for no reason. While American Dragon improved after a promising but faulted first season, Kim took a promising first season and slowly went south after.

And just for reference, here's the list in full again.

1 - Looney Tunes
2 - Batman: The Animated Series
3 - The Simpsons
4 - Rocky & Bullwinkle
5 - King Of The Hill
6 - Monster
7 - Ed, Edd, n' Eddy
8 - Cowboy Bebop
9 - Jonny Quest
10 - Yu Yu Hakusho
11 - Neon Genesis Evangelion
12 - MGM department umbrella
13 - Gargoyles
14 - The Flintstones
15 - Rocko's Modern Life
16 - Justice League & Unlimited
17 - Futurama
18- Mobile Suit Gundam
19 - Daria
20 - Dragon Ball
21 - South Park
22 - Home Movies
23 - DuckTales
24 - Tiny Toon Adventures
25 - Animaniacs
26 - Invader Zim
27 - The Boondocks
28 - Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni (When They Cry)
29 - Pinky & The Brain
30 - The Huckleberry Hound Show
31 - Lupin III
32 - Dexter's Laboratory
33 - Space Ghost: Coast To Coast
34 - Batman Beyond
35 - The Powerpuff Girls
36 - Harvey Birdman: Attorney At Law
37 - Darkwing Duck
38 - The Spectacular Spiderman
39 - Batman: The Brave & The Bold
40 - Full Metal Alchemist
41 - Johnny Bravo
42 - Duckman
43 - Freakazoid!
44 - Avatar: The Last Airbender
45 - GTO
46 - TMNT: 2K3
47 - Death Note
48 - The Critic
49 - Beast Wars
50 - Superman: TAS
51 - The Angry Beavers
52 - Paranoia Agent
53 - X-Men Evolution
54 - The Real Ghostbusters
55 - Megas XLR
56 - Courage the Cowardly Dog
57 - Full Metal Panic! The Second Raid
58 - ReBoot
59 - American Dragon: Jake Long
60 - W.I.T.C.H.
61 - Hunter X Hunter
62 - Cow & Chicken
63 - Excel Saga
64 - Baccano!
65 - Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes

Written by AR staff

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 13: 5-1

2011-07-09T11:28:00.001-04:00

5 -
King Of The Hill

If there's a show with a better cast of characters or a stronger good-to-bad episode ratio during a run as long as King of the Hill's, it has yet to be created.

The premise of King of the Hill is simple- Hank Hill, an all-American propane salesman in Arlen, Texas, makes the best out of his self-centered wife Peggy, socially confused son, Bobby, abandoned niece Luanne, and his wacky best friends. On top of that, he also deals with his drunk, womanizing boss, abusive father, and the rest of the town as we laugh along with them during Hank and the cast's trials and tribulations.

King is an animated sitcom, but one written with a flair missing in most situational comedies, animated or not. The cast of King of the Hill has developed greatly over the course of 13 seasons, but have been finely tuned to the point that a line that tackles something as familiar as Dale Gribble's paranoia or Bobby's naivety can still make you can still make you laugh like you've never heard them before.

The characters on KOTH are incredibly well-defined, and have been from an early point in the show. You have Hank, the voice of reason who isn't always right nut always means well, Dale's moronic rambling which often veer into charming more than creepy, Bill depressed state which makes for a laugh and a sob at the same time, and Boomhauer's incoherent words of wisdom. Then Peggy's "intellectual" musings, Bobby's athletic railings and comic stylings, Kahn's superiority complex, Cotton's warped generation gap, Luanne's optimism, and the joys of the supporting characters at Strickland Propane, Tom Landry Middle School, and the rest of Arlen, which make for one hell of a cast.

While King of the Hill's animation is fairly standard, the writing more than makes up for it. The fact that we can name all the lesser episodes of over 250 on one hand secures a spot on our list. That years later, we're still finding episodes of high quality all over the place earns it's ranking.

Written by Avaitor

4 -
The Rocky & Bullwinkle Show

Take a talking moose and squirrel pair that adhere to the classic buddy comedy formula, have them engage in ongoing serial shorts where they face troubles caused by Russian-like spies, add in a few wraparound shorts, give everything razor-sharp dialogue to make up for the cheap usage of animation, and that's Rocky and Bullwinkle in essence. A snappy series that could have only been made during the late 50's-early 60's, with more cleverness and finesse than anything.

The characters of Rocky and Bullwinkle weren't necessarily inventive at the time- straight guys and their foolish cohorts were typical in most buddy comedies. Rocky's mix of optimism and acceptance was a little fresh, since he was never harsh to his buddy, while Bullwinkle was in a class all by himself. He's cocky, self-assured, an artist, goofy, peculiar, many different things. Obnoxious and unlikable are just about the only things you can't say he is. They're also great friends, and handle each predicament tightly as buds.

Then you get the other segments, like Fractured Fairy Tales, which were hilarious send-ups of those classic stories, Peabody and Sherman, where a brilliant dog and his human boy pet go through time to fix history's problems, and Dudley Do-Right, the world's wackiest Mountie. Each of these were funny in their own rights, even if they weren't as typically entertaining as the moose and squirrel could be.

Since the show wasn't aimed at children in particular, it got away with a lot of references, attacking everything political at the time, as well as pop culture. Disney and the music industry in particular were knocked down a peg a few times by the moose and squirrel, their costars, and in the other segments, but even the harshest attacks were done with a bit of class and intelligence that you just don't find in programming like this anymore.

The Rocky & Bullwinkle Show was the sharpest thing aimed for children, if not on television period, during the time it was made. If anything dates it, the show's reliance on using Cold War paranoia to sell a joke might make some of it's jokes lost to younger viewers, but the vibrant use of language, brilliantly-plotted conversation, and the show's ability to twist general conventions around is what brings people back to it. And it still lives in today, thanks to how many people in the industry it has influenced and how deeply it has effected pop culture. To the point that creator Jay Ward nearly got Moosylvania, Bullwinkle's home state, granted statehood.

If that doesn't earn the show a ranking, everything else does. Maybe even a top 5, which is why it's here.

Written by Avaitor

3 -
The Simpsons

The show that built the FOX network, the Simpsons was a revolution in comedy when it started that continued for almost a decade, and without it, there is a good chance a lot of the shows that came after would simply not exist. The Simpsons was the master of low brow, high brow, subtle, obvious, referential, cartoon, satire, parody, and Warhol humor and at the same time defined a whole generation of kids, teenagers, and college students that are currently writing the stuff you watch, read, and listen to nowadays. This contribution is not something to be scoffed at, and in the field of animation is almost unparalleled. If nothing else, it gave us Conan O' Brien, and that in itself is no small feat.

A show about the modern family living in the modern world, the Simpson hits all the marks it is supposed to. It is crass, subtle, emotional, thought provoking, hilarious, weird, and fun. At its peak (which was about twice as long as most shows runs on this list) it had everything good entertainment should, and still manages to be quoted, thought of, and looked back on today. Father Homer's stupidity, daughter Lisa's overbearing knowledge, son Bart's mischievous nature, mother Marge's annoyed nagging, and baby Maggie's complete silence throughout lead a cast of hundreds of unique characters in the crazed town of Springfield all just as crazy as them.

What else am I supposed to say? There are no comedy shows in this day and age that have spanned quite the range this show has. The animation, despite the budget it has, manages to keep up with and enhance the writing to an even greater level, making this the show the ultimate example of how an animated sitcom should be portrayed.

Much has been written about the Simpsons and it's impact on our culture, so I won't speak on that much more, but I will say that if you grew up in the 90s and are reading this now, then you know what I'm talking about. The Simpsons is an animated program about a traditional family unit living in a standard American town called Springfield. You know what, I'm just going to stop here. I'm not going to tell you what you already know. The Simpsons was one of the best and important animated shows ever, and any list without it near the top is wrong. That's all there is to it.

Written by Desensitized

2 -
Batman: The Animated Series

Alright, we're not going to pretend like this is some surprise reveal. ANYONE reading this list knew that this would be placing at either the number 1 or 2 spot, just like it does for any list of this sort that has any shred of dignity, even the bad ones. For the longest time I had been pondering as to what exactly I would say about this series. I could just write about how great and influential it is to action shows and animation as a whole, but why should I spend an entire entry on writing what everyone reading this list clearly already knows. Its been said a million times over, and writing it here won't change anything. Instead, let's break down why exactly this series has aged so damn well, and why its still better than just about any other action show that has come out since its time.

First, before I get into what I'm going to say about this series, let me just mention something a bit personal: I did NOT grow up with this series. Sure, I watched quite a few episodes when I was a kid, but I certainly didn't watch it religiously and back then I didn't have too much appreciation for this series. As I grew older and became a teenager, I was a much more picky viewer and pretty much demanded that my entertainment have some actual added depth to it or at the very least cleverness in its writing. It was around this time that Cartoon Network's Toonami block started airing Batman: The Animated Series on a regular basis. I remembered that this show existed in my childhood very well if only because it was about Batman, but I hardly remembered any episodes that I used to watch or anything else about the show. In retrospect I'm glad that I was introduced to the series this way because I can safely say now that what I think of the series goes far beyond just fond nostalgic memories.

Quite simply put, I was blown away by this series's quality. This was before I went onto forums or even read reviews on the Internet, so I wasn't even aware of how massively, and deservedly popular it was among animation enthusiasts. And this is all for a very, very good reason. This show clearly has the most brilliant, talented team of writers and directors and animation staff in general that any animated series has EVER had the pleasure of having. Its no wonder that BTAS forever changed the face of what viewers would come to expect from their animated action shows. Being an avid watcher of most of the anime that was being aired on Toonami around that time, I was slowly allowing a bit of my naivety to pull me away from western animation believing that western cartoons would never evolve past the nostalgic shows of my childhood, but then coming face to face with this cartoon that existed when I was still barely able to put full sentences together, I got a huge and necessary slap in the face. I was immediately pulled into the deep and captivating tales that this animated iteration of Batman had to offer, and for the first time in my life I realized how it was just as important to write the villains of a series with as much care and focus as the heroes.

To get into the actual show itself, I would have to spend multiple articles writing about the huge plethora of episodic adventures that it covered, so its unfortunate that I have to do it a disservice here by keeping the focus of the entry quite limited in the grand scope of things. The show's episodic nature really let it cover a huge wealth of different episodes, including the occasional but very infrequent humorous ones, such as the unforgettable "Almost Got'im". However as we all know this show's true merits quite clearly lie in its mastery of telling darker tales with complex characters all-around. Before Batman: The Animated series came out with talented writers such as Paul Dini (among many others) and directors such as Bruce Timm (once again, among other brilliant animation directors as well), any show covering its subject material that would have come out before that would make the mistake of only trying to focus on the hero and what makes him tick. While that is indeed important for any great action show, the people behind this work of genius knew that to stand out they couldn't just leave it at that. Instead, they went above and beyond, giving us plots that not only broke down Batman/Bruce Wayne's psyche but also gave the same treatment to allies of his as well as his villains.

As kids we got to see the mysterious and complex relationship between Batman and Jim Gordon as fellow crime-fighters, yet with tension between Batman and the Police, as Batman was clearly treated as a Vigilante while Jim was a licensed law-enforcer. It made it all the more significant to see the deep level of respect that both Batman and Commissioner Gordon had for one another. Not so keen on the actions of the Dark Knight was Bullock, who often served as Gordon's right hand man, and despite his respect for Gordon he never came to trust Batman. This added a more realistic element of sorts to the series, to show that even other "good guys" had issues with Batman, further conveying to the audience the hardships that Bruce had to face when dawning on his black cape and cowl, as despite best intentions he would still be viewed with as much hate as any villains by those who didn't understand his actions or his reasons for being a masked defender of justice in a highly corrupt city.

Not only Batman got important character growth, though. The writers also stretched out their talents to truly explore not only 1, but 2 Robins, Dick (an older side-kick of Bruce who left him for reasons explained in another great episode of this series to become a capeless hero known as Night Wing) and Tim Drake (who oddly enough was just a young kid but with an extraordinarily high level of training for his age, who also sort of served as an understudy to Bruce beyond just being a side-kick of his). Once again, in any other show these characters would be annoying hindrances to the hero, but here they were taken seriously and given the amount of depth and backstory that they deserved as characters worthy of aiding Batman himself. In addition to this, we even got a great version of the Batgirl, who was the alter ego of Barbra Gordon, the daughter of the very same Commissioner Gordon, making for an interesting little secret in the family.

And of course as I mentioned that the villains got just as much care and attention put into them as any of the heroes, how could I not bother to mention the great cast of villains? Perhaps the most memorable in terms of having a tragic past would be Mr. Freeze. In the episode "Heart of Ice," we got to see how Freeze was an ordinary man who worked as a scientist with a loving wife before an experiment of his was interfered with by a big corporate higher-up, putting his wife in a catatonic state that he couldn't cure and destroying his life forever. Before this, I hear that Mr. Freeze was a mess of a character and villain in Batman comic-lore, but over here he was given a fully fleshed out back story with proper characterization. When Batman finally took him down it wasn't a triumphant scene for the Dark Knight himself or the audience, but instead it was played out as a sad reality. The scene that followed after where Batman revealed the evidence of Freeze's life being destroyed by the very same businessman he was seeking revenge on was the true moment of triumph, yet still filled with sadness. That's when it hit most viewers that this series was not just talking down to kids like every other action cartoon before it. It was instead helping them grow up. In episodes like this one as an example, we got to see that there was more than what meets the eye on the outset, we got to actually sympathize with a villain and actually feel his pain as he was not able to get his long sought-after revenge. I challenge anyone to attempt to come up with any animated series that was able to do something of that caliber before the debut of BTAS.

I could go on and on about the villains, but they themselves would each require their own series of articles to truly explore. We had the usual fair such as Penguin, Killer Croc, Mad Hatter, Riddler, and Scarecrow. And of course I would be more insane than The Joker himself to not mention his inclusion in the series and his brilliant portrayal by none other than Luke Skywalker....I mean Mark Hamil, of course. We even got a brand new face in Harley-Quinn, the Joker's forever loyal side-kick, with a deranged yet strangely engaging personality, and one of the best back-stories for any villain ever written in the one of the series's best episodes, "Mad Love." Perhaps the most notable villains besides Mr. Freeze, though, were Two-Face (who had a brilliant two-part episode featuring his full-fledged transformation from Bruce's long-time friend Harvey Dent into his villainous persona), Clayface (another tragic figure who had more than one truly memorable appearance in the series), and Poison Ivy, who had an especially notorious episode (which I swear scared the shit out of me when I was a kid) in a truly unforgettable and downright creepy episode by the title of "House and Garden," in which we actually explore Ivy's desire to leave behind her life of crime and have a family....in a very twisted way of sorts, it would appear (and seriously, if you have not seen this episode: GO WATCH IT NOW! I'm not spoiling the shocking ending for you here).

I can't go on enough about how brilliant the show's characters are, and when you get down to it, that's the show's biggest success. If you just took its plots, it wouldn't be anything too much more than the average action show. It was how the show handled its characters beyond anything else that made it a darker and more complex experience than just about any other action show that has come either before or after it. Not every episode is exactly the golden standards of writing or animation, but most of the show's offerings are top-quality. There were tons of great episodes, in fact, that I truly wanted to talk about but never got to mention for the sake of keeping this entry at a readable length, including a personal favorite of mine involving Bruce confronting his childhood hero, titled "Beware the Gray Ghost."

Really, I have to assume that just about anyone reading this list has at least watched a reasonable portion of this series, but if somehow someone was living in a cave for the past 20 years and happens to be browsing the Internet and reading this article, then stop reading right now and go find this show and watch it. Its truly a masterpiece among action shows and absolutely deserves to be watched by just about anyone who is a fan of animation, action shows, Batman, superheroes in general, detective and mystery shows, shows with dark themes and complex characters in the forms of both heroes and villains, or any combination of these elements. And if you're not a fan of any of those things, watch this show anyways because it'll make you a fan of all of these fine elements of story-telling. I don't know what else to say from this point on. This is quite clearly the best show of its kind and one of the best series that animation has to offer and there's a reason why its ranked so high on our list and just about any other "greatest animated" list in existence that is made by people with at least some scrap of intelligence. Of course, this did only rank at #2 on our list, but I wonder what could possibly top this mastery of a work of animation, unless it is of course....

Written by Ensatsu-Ken

1 -
Looney Tunes

"Eh, what's up doc?"

What do you think of when you here that question? Hopefully it isn't a phone call from an actual doctor who's calling to tell you your son has cancer, 'cause that would kind of suck. Oh right, I get it, you're thinking of Bugs Bunny, perhaps the funniest smart-ass in the history of animation. That's a good thing though, because that just goes to show you how much influence Bugs and the rest of the Looney Tunes have left on the artform, not to mention pop-culture in general. "Of course you realize, this means war!", "Sufferin' Succotash!", "You're despicable!", "I tawt I taw a puddytat!", "That's a-I say-that's a joke son!" All these phrases, while some of them not originating from the franchise, are well-known sayings from the land of a Weisenheimer rabbit, a wacky duck, a cute-yet-sadistic little bird, a loud-mouthed rooster, a determined coyote and a roadrunner who's just living his life as the fastest bird in the American Southwest, and plenty more wonderful and unique characters.

The Warner Bros. cartoon shorts, also known under the banners of "Looney Tunes"(not "Toons" dammit) and "Merrie Melodies" were started in 1930 by Hugh Harman and Rudolph Ising, who were doing pretty much what every other cartoon studio was doing-trying to capitalize on the success of Walt Disney and his creation Mickey Mouse. The original thought was to make cartoons that featured soundtracks of songs that were at the time recently acquired by Warner Bros., utilizing characters like Bosko. Harmen and Ising left Warner in 1933, after a dispute with Leon Schlesinger and taking all of their creations with them, which included early attempts at stars Bosko and Buddy. What resulted was probably the best thing that could've happened to ol' Leon; cartoonists Isadore "Friz" Freleng, Fred "Tex" Avery, Robert "Bob" Clampett, Charles M. "Chuck" Jones, and later additions Robert McKimson, Arthur Davis, and Frank Tashlin, were brought to the studio and formed what became known as the "Termite Terrace". The group got it's first star in 1935 in the form of Porky Pig, who debuted in the Freleng-directed short I Haven't Got a Hat(the cartoon was originally meant to launch the character Beans the Cat to stardom). Over the next couple of years, more cartoons featuring Porky were made, and other cartoons like Avery's I Love to Singa(one of my personal favorites), until 1937, when the Avery-directed Porky's Duck Hunt introduced Daffy Duck. The cartoon featured Porky and his dog out duck hunting, when the duo encounter a crazy duck, who proceeds to hoot and holler, bounce around the screen, and torment Porky, something which cartoon characters hadn't done up to that point. Daffy ushered in the period of the screwball character(which inspired characters from other studios such as Woody Woodpecker and later Screwball Squirrel), and was an instant hit.

This period of the late 30s also saw the development of two more important characters-Elmer Fudd(first known as Egghead) and Bugs Bunny. Debuting in the 1940 Avery-directed A Wild Hare, the rabbit was teamed up with hunter Elmer Fudd, not only starting their career together, but also featuring such hallmarks as Elmer's "Be vewy, vewy quiet, I'm hunting wabbits" and Bugs' "Eh, what's up doc?" whilst nonchalantly munching on a carrot. The cartoon was a success, and Bugs would go on to be the studios most successful creation, as he would become highly popular during World War II. Around this time though, Tex Avery and Leon Schlesinger encountered in a series of disputes, which resulted from an argument regarding Avery's cartoon The Heckling Hare, and Avery left the studio, soon resurfacing at MGM. Bob Clampett took over for Avery, finishing up the last couple of shorts Avery was working on, before departing the studio himself in 1946. Schlesinger sold his studio to WB in 1944, and slipped into retirement before eventually passing away in 1949.

Throughout the rest of the 40s, both the success of the cartoons(WB overtook Disney as the most successful cartoon studio in 1942) as well as the roster would grow, and familiar characters such as Tweety Bird(introduced in 1942 in Bob Clampett's A Tale of Two Kitties), Yosemite Sam(1945 in Friz Freleng's Hare Trigger), Sylvester the cat(1945 in Freleng's Life with Feathers), Pepe le Pew(1945 in Chuck Jones' Odor-able Kitty, Foghorn Leghorn(1946 in Robert Mckimson's Walky Talky Hawky), Wile E. Coyote and the Roadrunner(1949 in Jones' Fast and Furry-ous) and Speedy Gonzales(1953 in McKimson's Cat Tails for Two; Speedy was later redesigned in 1955 by Freleng for the cartoon Speedy Gonzales). Warner Bros. continued to produce cartoons until 1964(except for a five month period of 1953), at which time they shut down the studio. Production of Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies was outsourced to DePatie-Freleng studios, who produced cartoons for WB until 1967(which mainly consisted of cartoon shorts starring Daffy and Speedy, as well as various minor characters like Cool Cat and Merlin the Magic Mouse), at which point WB resumed production at their own studio before shutting down again in 1969, thus ending the theatrical reign of the Looney Tunes characters. In the years since, there have been various revivals, some more successful than others, films like Jones' compilation movies(The Bugs Bunny/Roadrunner Movie, The Looney Looney Looney Bugs Bunny Movie, etc.), Space Jam, and Looney Tunes: Back in Action(the characters also cameo-ed in 1988's Who Framed Roger Rabbit, the last time they would be voiced by Mel Blanc), and other miscellaneous appearances, all of which often have mixed reaction from fans. The cartoon shorts also remained a hot item on television, first appearing on network television in the 1950's, and later debuting on cable on Nickelodeon in 1988.

There are several things that make the Looney Tunes' original theatrical shorts masterpieces amongst fans, such as the direction of different directors like Avery, Clampett, Freleng, Jones and McKimson, the musical cues of Carl Stalling, and the awesome voicework of Mel Blanc, who voiced most of the LT cast, from tiny Tweety Bird to raucous Yosemite Sam. A majority of the cartoons were made with great amounts of wit and excellent comedic timing, often times parodying things in pop-culture such as movies or radio shows or other wise major events, such as WWII. They also featured amazing artwork, backgrounds, and well designed characters, something that with all the technology that has emerged since has still remained difficult to replicate. On the other token, the LT's have been the subject of controversies and criticisms as well. In the late 60s, censorship of certain shorts that contained racially offensive material surfaced, with later censorship of violence also emerging(thankfully much of this censorship has been fought in more recent years, with previously edited cartoons being available uncut once more), and much of the content produced since the late 50s has been criticized by fans as not up to par as the material from the 40s.

Of course, what would the franchise be without the characters? Everybody has their favorite, whether it be Daffy Duck or Bugs Bunny, or even the Tazmanian Devil. And why not, with all the different personalities of the characters? Bugs Bunny started off as a mischievous rabbit who almost always had the upper hand, before eventually evolving into a suave character who used his adversaries' weaknesses against them. Daffy Duck started off as an uncontainable screwball who bounced all over the screen, before becoming more savvy in the mid-40s, and eventually becoming Bugs' rival, jealous of all the praise the rabbit got. Tweety originally appeared as a baby bird who, after being disrupted by cats trying to eat him, became a sadist in order to defend himself. He was later teamed up with Sylvester the cat, a very prideful character who refused to give up the chase, and the two would become the most famous case of cat chasing his prey this side of Tom and Jerry(with Sylvester almost always losing). Wile E. Coyote and the Roadrunner were similar, with the difference being Wile using ACME Corporation's enormous catalog of different devices, with nearly all of them backfiring due to Wile's ineptitude or even ACME's seemingly faulty products. Also, unlike Tweety, the Roadrunner very rarely did anything to harm the coyote, he was merely minding his own business and only used his great speed to defend himself.

As for cartoons I'd recommend, I dunno, there's quite a few good ones. Cartoons like Duck Amuck, The Great Piggy Bank Robbery, Rabbit of Seville, Scaredy Cat, Gee Whiz-z-z-z-z-z-z, Operation: Rabbit, Porky Pig's Feat, the hunting trilogy of Rabbit Fire/Rabbit Seasoning/Duck! Rabbit! Duck, Daffy Duck in Hollywood, Canary Row, A Fractured Leghorn, and Thugs with Dirty Mugs are all great examples of some of the finest shorts in the LT filmography, and many more are on the Looney Tunes Golden Collection series of DVD sets, something which I'd highly recommend investing in.

Looney Tunes have had a great deal of impact on pop-culture as we know it. Despite being less and less exposed in modern times, people still know and love the characters. You still see them on T-shirts, in video games, as children's toys, on trips to Six Flags, on the mudflaps of 18-wheelers going down the freeway. They are still quoted in TV and film, the shorts still make appearances in the background in movies, comedians routinely name them as influences, the list just goes on. They sure did their number in influencing my life, with the only other fictional aspect that means as much to me as they do being The Simpsons. For this, I think that they are more than deserving for all the praise that they get, and their spot as the best animated series of all time, not just on this list, but many others, is well earned. So, I thank Bugs, Daffy, Elmer, Foghorn, Sylvester and Tweety, Porky, Yosemite Sam, Wile E. Coyote and the Roadrunner, Marvin the Martian, Speedy Gonzales, as well as the fine talents of Tex Avery, Bob Clampett, Chuck Jones, Friz Freleng, Frank Tashlin, Robert McKimson, Mel Blanc, Carl Stalling, Michael Maltese, and all the rest that made the Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies series of cartoons the great pieces of art that they are.

Written by SNES Chalmers

And there's our list. What a ride it's been. A bonus entry will be posted tomorrow mentioning series that just missed the cut, but for now, we'd like to thank everyone for reading and commenting on the series. We couldn't have done this without your incredible support.

P.S. Can you name where each of the eight screenshots came from in the picture for the Looney Tunes entry? Each was taken from a particular cartoon, and none where mentioned in the article.

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 12: 10-6

2011-07-08T11:42:00.000-04:00

10 -
Yu Yu Hakusho

Yusuke Urameshi is a punk Japanese student. His mom is barely there, he has very few close friends, and his teachers don't care much for him, to the point that he ends up missing more school than attending. One day, out of a random act of kindness, Yusuke saves the life of a young boy that jumps into traffic to grab his ball. The result is that Yusuke saves the boy's life, but loses his in the process.

In a divine turn of events, it seems that this wasn't meant to happen. Botan, the adorable reaper, comes to Yusuke's spirit with a comprise: if Yusuke is willing to take on spiritual powers to help the king of the spirit world, the great Konema, solve mystical cases, he can have his life back. Yusuke accepts, and then we get Yu Yu Hakusho, one of the most endearing series to come out of Shonen Jump.

Yu Yu is everything a fan of action can hope for, old or young. While the action scenes are insane and worthy of mention, the characters are the heart and soul of the show. Yusuke and his group of fighters and supporters are very well-rounded, to where just about anything you'd want to know about the characters are filled in.

Just looking at the main four fighters, take Hiei. Initially the toughest main character, he doesn't lose that edge at all, but shows a strong balance of human and demon side early on. The introduction of his half-sister, for one, showed that not only does Hiei not entirely despise humankind, but is willing to kill in a heartbeat for the people he cares for the most, and gives us a taste of his true power, which would be further elaborated on later. When we see his greatest tricks not too long after, the character doesn't need to prove how much of a badass he is any longer, but that still isn't the end there.

Kuwabara starts off as a dumb brute who is Yusuke's rival, but ends up becoming his best friend and one of the most important members of the team. He has a heart and determination that the team all needs and they appreciate his drive. He has an honor code from even the very beginning that helps to build the character. The big guy gives some speeches that while they sometimes go nowhere, always have the right idea and gives just the push that they need.

Kurama is a fox demon with a strong connection to both the human and spirit world, being raised by a human mother but having ties to his fellow demons. What this helps to build is a "pretty boy" with a brain and a heart, one that's willing to take big sacrifices for the team and not think twice. He also has a finesse that the rest of the team lacks, and lives up to his looks, as well as a mind that strategists can look up to. He may just be the sharpest on the show, but is hardly ever arrogant about it.

And finally, Yusuke's transformation from rough kid to a clever kid with a good heart isn't really that big of one as you'd think, since Yusuke was always like that, but never had the chance to prove himself until the compromise. Yusuke, in some ways, is the heart of a show- a tough exterior with good sprinkled throughout that becomes more prevalent when you get into it.

These characters have taken on strong adversaries, from the powerful Toguro brothers to former spirit detective turned rogue Sensui, who understands more about the human world than anyone could possibly care to. Each arc in the show, done without filler or as few cheats as possible, give us a great film-like narrative that are just that good.

Yu Yu Hakusho has heart and intensity that just about every other Jump series wishes they had. It also has a sense of humor, brain and atmosphere missing in them too. Just the show made for beginners and lovers alike.

Written by Avaitor

9 -
Jonny Quest

There was nothing quite like the original Jonny Quest when it premiered in 1964, and although many have tried, there's been nothing like it since. Not only was Quest the first animated action-adventure series to hit airwaves, but it also had some of the sharpest designs and scripts to grace the Hanna-Barbera studio.

The appeal of Jonny Quest comes from the fact that it's a boys fantasy. Young Jonny travels across the world with his brilliant scientist father Dr. Benton Quest, babysitter/handyman/adventurer extraordinaire Race Bannon, adopted Indian brother and best friend Hadji, and his loyal dog Bandit. Using some innovative new technology (for the time being), the Quest clan go the world over to work on new scientific breakthroughs, while along the way they experience exciting adventures few people could possibly believe if they weren't caught on film. In the original 26 episodes, the clan dealt with mummies, robot spies, mutated animals, and various groups of agents, and that's just a sampling of their adventures.

Quest's stories were typically written with a flair for adventure and science fiction, often neatly contained in exciting half-hour stories which contain enough suspense and craft to entertain as well as any hour-long drama could. The characters, while not especially round compared to recent standards, were balanced enough to hold their own throughout the show. The dialogue is pretty sharp, albeit a little hokey, and interactions between the characters feel natural and sound normal for it's time.

Also contributing to the show's quality is Doug Wildey's iconic character designs. More layered than expected from the Hanna-Barbera studio at the time, the show's visuals balanced Wildey's comic book influences with a more realistic, atmospheric approach. Even the animation is fairly crisper than the average animated series at the time of Quest's premiere. It also had the budget to prove it, which combined with Quest's less-than-exceptional ratings during it's initial primetime run gave the show a brief lifespan.

Years of seemingly endless repeats have been kind to Jonny Quest. Not only is the show a pop culture icon, with warm sppofs ranging from Freakazoid!'s "Toby Danger" to The Venture Brothers itself, and has continually been given updates to this day. A "second season" was made in the 80's to add to it's syndication count, a spin-off series was made in the 90's for Cartoon Network to try out new CGI technology, and a live-action movie has been commissioned by Warner to be made in the near future.

On top of never ending repeats on Boomerang, Jonny Quest will always be a part of culture. Without it, the chances of Batman: The Animated Series, Avatar: The Last Airbender, or other favorite action-adventure animated series being made are slim to none. That on top of the fact that it's still an entertaining piece of adventure-based fiction earns it a spot in the top 10.

Written by Avaitor

8 -
Cowboy Bebop

I’m gonna’ cut the bullshit and lay this out for you right now: there is no cartoon groovier than Cowboy Bebop. From the infectiously jazzy soundtrack to the stylish and sexy action scenes to the unparalleled badassery of the protagonist, this is one series that consistently impresses and never falls flat. It’s THE gateway anime – internationally, it’s bigger than Trigun, bigger than Gundam, heck, it’s bigger than freakin’ Dragon Ball! Even anime detractors get a kick out of seeing Spike Spiegel shoot some poor sap in the face (I’d know; I used to be one of them). It’s always exciting, usually fun, sometimes thought-provoking, and occasionally hilarious. It’s episodic, but the characters grow a bit in every episode, and there’s some semblance of an overarching plot that always comes into play in the very best installments. In essence, it’s the perfect television program; wonderfully paced and never anything but entertaining.

Not every episode is action-packed, but the ones that are certainly rank amongst the top anime episodes ever produced. Frenetic shoot-outs and fist fights abound, especially in the two-part finale and spin-off film, keeping viewers on the edge of their seats from start to finish. The slower-paced episodes offer notable insight into the lives and pasts of our four lovable main characters while never coming off as overly drawn-out or boring, a rare feat that Cowboy Bebop accomplishes as if it were nothing.

The animation is always fluid and never seems dated, despite the series being nearly 13 years old as of this writing. Every scene is animated with a kind of love one rarely sees in anime these days. And who could forget the excellent audio production for this show? The Seatbelts’ wonderful original soundtrack spans more than 5 discs, and against all odds, every track is phenomenal. It’s an OST worth owning – not just by anime fan standards, but by music lover standards, as well. The voice acting is fantastic in both languages, but special mention must be given to the English dub. Steve Blum is Spike Spiegel, no two ways about it.

Sure, one could nitpick the fact that the main plot is important in all of 6 episodes, but that would be missing the point. True space cowboys will weep as they listen to the full version of The Real Folk Blues and grab the popcorn for when they slide in their DVDs for yet another viewing session.

Bang.

Written by Foggle

7 -
Ed, Edd, n' Eddy

What is there to say about this show that I haven't said before?

Ed, Edd, n' Eddy is childhood, the entire experience, rolled up into one series. With the Eds and the rest of the Cul-De-Sac, you get all the joys, the thrill of summer break being in your hands, all the fun you have with your best friends, without the thought that one day you may not see most of them again coming into your head. Then it contains the bad as well, the awkward feelings of confusion, isolation, and heartache that you feel when you get a little older, the increasingly dying sense of innocence, and the inevitable parting of close friends. You also get everything else in between with the show.

The three main characters, each named Ed, each with their own distinctive personality, attempt to entertain their neighborhood chums so they can gain a decent quarter or two off of them for a jawbreaker. Part of the show's fun comes from watching the Eds come up with new scams, from a taco stand made out of paper plates, crayons, and actual hot sauce, a fully-realized mummy tomb, and a water cruise led on a tire. Seeing what they come up with on so little is funny, but if the characters weren't so strong, it wouldn't have the same appeal.

You have Ed, the big lovable oaf. A bit slow, but he knows his sci-fi and can come up with some brilliant ideas. Then there's Edd, or Double D, the highly temperamental brain of the group. His logic helps the Eds out a lot, but his big mouth hurts them as well, making for a fun compromise. And then there's Eddy. The man with the plan. The schemer. Partly insane, partly loving, undeniably screwed up, Eddy is the heart, hatred, and pain of the show all at once, which makes him both lovable and deplorable at the same time. There aren't many main characters like him, which is both a good and bad thing.

Their misadventures and strong chemistry is what pulls the show together, but the supporting cast is just as crucial. We have Ed's twisted little sister Sarah, her bi-curious playmate Jimmy, tough guy Kevin, flirty girl Nazz, wood-obsessed Johnny 2x4 and his buddy Plank, and of course, the strange foreigner Rolf. Not to mention the horny trailer trash Kanker sisters. Stereotypes we've all seen before that get plenty of screen time and development, just about every character here has grown since their first appearances and have fully round reasons for acting like they do, or are even above certain traits of themselves now.

Who hasn't felt like Eddy before? Alone, depressed, angry, and craving a jawbreaker? Or Jimmy, feeling down and bullied by your superiors, and wanting to stand up for yourself? Or Rolf, just being the odd guy out?

The thing that puts Ed, Edd, n' Eddy above many other series is how these typical character traits are a part of our own personalities, from their ages to now, and reflect ourselves during arguably the most vulnerable part of our lives. This is what has drawn children to it for years on end, brought the people who grew up with it back to watch the show and remember why they loved it, and brought in older viewers all over the world into these characters.

That, and the fact that everything else about it is just astounding. The scripts are out of this world, with unbelievable dialogue that messes with logic, grammar, and anything else held sacred, all while cracking as few pop culture references or taste barriers as possible. Production values that work better than anything on TV, ranging from amazing animation and storyboard work, to pitch-perfect music, to a reasonably emotionally balanced cast. And the overall setting of Peach Creek, which is unlike anything else.

There's so much to laud about Ed, Edd, n' Eddy, but not enough people do. It contains so many emotions despite the type of show it is, and is best enjoyed by those who grew up watching the show and are older to appreciate the attempts at satire it reaches. There wasn't, isn't, and won't be anything as emotionally satisfying and heartbreaking as Ed, Edd, n' Eddy for it's demographic, and needs to be appreciated for the modern classic that it is.

Written by Avaitor

6 -
Monster

"The instructors and children died that day, all fifty of them. And Johan simply gazed upon it. I asked him. What did you do? He took an oily rag and tossed it into the fire. He said; "Hate is born when people come together. I just added a little fuel to the flames." A ten-year-old boy! Kinderheim 511 was an experiment to raise children into perfect soldiers. Looking at it now, it was a meager experiment. Johan was born a leader. He was made to stand at the top. We couldn't have made a work of art like him. He was more than human, a true monster from the beginning."

Perhaps the best thing to come out of Japan in a long time, the psychological warfare of Monster is already well regarded as a masterpiece, far be it from me to explain it further. A drama that doesn't get pretentious with it's themes, action that doesn't go over the top, story turns that are not cliched or forced, characters that all have a level of depth, and an ending that ties everything up and manages to leave you thinking, Monster is about as great as the medium of television gets, never mind anime.

Monster is a story about a doctor named Kenzo Tenma who must deal with a decision he made a long time ago, and along the way discover if his worldview (the one that led him to his decision) was truly the right one. Along the way he is tested by the very person he saved with his very decision all those years ago. That's the gist of it, and telling more would be spoiling, something I simply cannot do for something like Monster. But there is plenty of suspense, drama, life lessons, and even comedic moments along the way.

What makes this stand out from so many other animated dramas is the fact that this is probably one of the best dramas out there period. Not only is it thrilling, action packed, and psychological, but every single character has a role that can not be overlooked. The animation and art also help to enhance the atmosphere of Monster giving it a unique style you will not find in any other drama be they animated or not. Since it's from a manga, the character designs are ripped from the pages, and the settings, music, and general art replicate the feel of both urban drama, and the historical settings of the plot perfectly.

Adapted from Naoki Urasawa's manga, Monster is a perfect adaption of his original manga, with no filler or extra duff added in to pad it out like many other anime adaptions. The anime for the most part is a panel by panel adaption of the manga, which many other anime (hello there, Rurouni Kenshin!) could learn from. While you can basically get the same experience from reading the manga, this is more than a worthy adaption equaling the original in the emotional punch the story delivers. Simply put, it's one of the best stories in animation you'll ever watch.

written by Desensitized

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 11: 15-11

2011-07-07T12:02:00.000-04:00

15 -
Rocko's Modern Life

Each of the classic Nicktoons had a distinctive identity (we'll get into this a little more some point along the road), and Rocko's was being the quirky show. The really quirky one- the one that would dare to make jokes about the No Tell Motel, make an entire episode about the main character's horny next-door neighbor make Mrs. Robinson look like the moms from The Kids Are Alright, have an angry mob attack him for liking rainbows, and get us to gaze at the nipples of the future. Oh, and make a musical about the pluses and minuses of conversation, and episodes involving the animation industry, politics of dog catching, and interspecies marriage.

Yeah, Rocko's Modern Life was an odd show. Odd in a hilarious way. That's what made it so endearing. What other series could be able to tug at our heartstrings about the hardships of old age right before and after seeing a wallaby being whacked by an old wolf for being a beaver?

Rocko is your average wallaby out of Australia. A nice guy making a living by working at a comic book shop. Along with his good friend Heffer Wolfe (who's actually a steer) and Filbert the turtle, Rocko goes through ordinary every day life in some not-some-ordinary ways. It's the constant absurdity of the situations on top of the show's consistently sharp writing and off-kilter humor that made RML stick out among all the other cartoons from the time, and make it hold up today. There aren't many better balances of kid-friendly humor on top of sensual and satirical references that would be over the head of most children than what you got in Rocko, and today's animators wish they had the ability to make a comedy that stuck like it.

While plenty of animators are attempting to make cartoons for "grown-ups", most adult viewers would be more likely to find pleasure in this gem than most of what passes for adult comedy nowadays. One of Nick's highlights from the 90's, and one of their best series in general.

Written by Avaitor

14 -
Gargoyles

In the wake of Batman: The Animated Series in the early 90's, animated actions shows saw a change in tone, from the campy stories and cardboard characters of the 80's to a general darker tone with more complex stories and characters, including the villains. While other shows may have earned some merit in their attempt to live up to BTAS's success, only one show, airing on Disney Afternoon of all possible places on television at the time, truly managed to answer to it: Gargoyles. With a genius like Greg Weisman working on the project, and a team of talented writers and animators, Gargoyles managed to take the action show audience by storm, quite simply because it was more than just a great action show. It was top-notch on all fronts, from story and dialogue to characters and voice-acting. We even got complex villains that were not only sufficient threats to the heroes but were interesting to analyze as characters in and of themselves.

The story itself is simple enough: In the middle ages where mythical creatures such as Gargoyles exist, a certain clan of Gargoyles led by Goliath protect a Scottish castle from constant attack, as ferocious creatures that scare and fight off any pillagers away with ease. What balances out their strength, though, is their weakness of turning into stone and being left completely vulnerable during the hours of daylight. Through certain circumstances of betrayal and deception, many Gargoyles are killed and only a few of Goliath's clan are left alive, and those that did survive are cursed to turn to stone until their castle rises above the clouds. Thankfully in the present day with modern technology, a man by the name of David Xanatos is able to break their curse: and THIS is where the show really starts. Early on in the series, however, it is revealed that Xanatos himself has ulterior motives and quickly shows his true colors as a villain, which only shows the Gargoyles how this generation is just as untrustworthy as the one they were used to. That is with the exception of a lone police woman, Elisa Maza, who discovers and befriends them, and acts as their ally supporting them in all of their endeavors in the modern world. Through this, a basic premise becomes far more interesting when mythical creatures of an older time period are forced to live in a completely new era, not only in a land foreign to their own but in an entire world that they are unfamiliar with. Yet through it all they must maintain their divinity as the heroic characters that they are, and overcome the heavy themes of prejudice and misunderstood hate and fear that they are subject to throughout this series.

Gargoyles is a show riddled with very dynamic interactions between each of its characters, especially when it comes to its villains. In addition to Xanatos revealing himself as an enemy to the Gargoyles, one of their own who they previous thought to be dead shows up, only to inevitably betray them in her hate and disgust for humankind, and cause them further hardships as their greatest foe. She comes to call herself Demona, and by far she is the most memorable villain of this series for her deep back-story and extremely complex and intricate persona. You really get a sense of how her mind works throughout the series and at times can't help but sympathize with her, which aside from BTAS, makes for one of the only action shows of the time that could really make such a complex villain that even as a kid someone would actually want to analyze. Throughout the series there are a number of other well-written villains, some of them having ties to other characters and also coming off as quite memorable.

Of course, no great action show could be great if it didn't have great heroes that people would keep coming back to see with each new episode, and Gargoyles of course did not disappoint one bit in this department. Goliath, voice by the extremely talented and deep-voiced Keith David, immediately stands as a stern and bold character who was always destined to be a great leader, and throughout the series he does more than just beat up tough baddies, but also subjects himself to tough decision-making and always puts his neck out for the rest of the team and to protect his police ally Elisa, who strangely enough is the only human who he ever puts his full trust in (there is a....strange infatuation that goes on between the 2, to say the least). Elisa herself is a very interesting character in her own right, in how accepting she is of the Gargoyles despite not exactly being raised in a position where she would have even believed such mythical creatures existed before actually meeting them, and more often than not she is more useful than any individual member of Goliath's clan, often getting the team out of danger more times than they have to save her, which isn't very often at all due to how resourceful and independent she is. The other clan members are also highly interesting, and while they don't get nearly as much depth as Goliath, Elisa, and some of the villains do, they work very well together as a team and the character dynamics between them as they interact with one another makes for some truly interesting moments in the show. Hudson is the old, former-leader of the team, but he still proves to be a great warrior and acts as the wise advisor to Goliath, and a source of inspiration for the rest of the team. Brooklyn, Broadway, Lexington, and their pet Gargoyle-like thing, Bronx (yes, if you haven't guessed by now, they chose to name themselves after popular areas in New York) each play off of each other very well and serve to help balance out the series by giving it a humorous, comic relief side, yet at the same time they can be equally as serious as any of the main characters and are the core of what makes the whole team-dynamic of this show work so well.

Going into everything that makes this a great show and a worthy entry on ANY list of the greatest animated shows of all time would mean that this entry would go on forever. What can be said is that beyond the success of BTAS, Gargoyles further proved the success of giving both younger and older fans of action shows and animation in general alike a deeper and darker experience with more complex characters from heroes to villains, on all fronts. While a show like BTAS started the trend of giving action cartoon fans what they always really wanted in a truly great series, if it weren't for nearly equally important shows like Gargoyles which further proved the success of breaking past the traditional formula of the 80's cartoons, the trend may have died out before long. Thanks to series like this, however, we can now enjoy the numerous great action cartoons that have spawned since then, so not only is it a quality show that holds up perfectly well upon repeated viewings, but it is also an extremely important item in the history of televised animation, and thus fully deserves its spot on this list.

Written by Ensatsu-ken

13 -
The Flintstones

The challenge for Hanna-Barbera over 50 years ago: create a half-hour animated sitcom primarily starring humans, build a fanbase out of more than just children, and hold up on it's own for primetime.

The result: with The Flintstones, Hanna-Barbera had created arguably it's most successful property. Lasting a than unheard of six season run that continually ran in repeats for years to come, made billions in merchandise, and has had enough spin-offs and continuations to leave fans happy for a lifetime. Even today the show still has a large, loyal fanbase of all ages that could recognize the scream of "Yabba-Dabba-Doo" in an instant.

Going primetime is possibly the best thing that could have happened to Hannah-Barbera. Their earlier funny animal cartoons such as Huckleberry Hound and Quick Draw McGraw saved grace by having former Looney Tunes storymen Warren Foster and Michael Maltese handle their scripts, but later additions such as Hokey Wolf and Yakky Doodle sucked the studio's creativity dry, while even some of the best would have classic gags from their writer's previous shorts lifted in limited animation. Flintstones had top-notch scripts hit up by the studio's best, which satirized the tropes used in sitcoms at the time, as well as used some to their advantage.

There is an array of classic stories told in the bulk of the show, ranging from Fred trying to live it up at a masquerade ball to him and Barney writing a number for his baby Pebbles with Ann Margorck, with touches of sci-fi added in with the Great Gazoo or the case of the multiple Fred's. Each story here is added with enough fresh wit and clever slapstick that holds up for children and adults alike.

The characters are what really make the show though, especially the relationships. Fred Flintstone is the most endearing character from the series, and for good reason. Fred is an idealistic schemer, an active dreamer with a silver tongue and a heart of gold. No matter what may come out of his mouth, Fred never steps over the line and remains an ideal lead. Wilma's sarcastic hard love is a great match for him, and the two remain one of the most beloved animated couples of all time. Meanwhile, the Rubbles are sweeter and less judgemental, but still have their tempers, which make for a fun contrast between the characters.

Admittedly the show got increasingly campier as it went on, with additions such as Pebbles, Bamm-Bamm, and the Great Gazoo messing up the formula a little, and the advent if guest appearances also felt out of place. The first few seasons, as well as the highlights from even the weaker years are still charming 50 years on, and the show's legacy in undeniable.

Written by Avaitor

12 -
MGM department umbrella

To cram all of the outstanding works of animation of one major department of animation such as this (each of which could easily occupy their own spot on a list such as this) would be what some would call cheating by tying too many things in one spot. But when the quality of the work from said animation department is so consistently great throughout almost everything they have to offer, its almost a crime to split up their rankings. This entry is more to recognize MGM's animation department as a whole rather than just any single thing they put out. This mostly consists of the classic Tom and Jerry Cartoons and most of Tex Avery's work for MGM which were almost purely made up of brilliant one-shots.

Tom and Jerry is a series which I feel pretty much needs no introduction. Its the most simple premise in the world for a cartoon: A cat chases a mouse. Its really an age-old type of set-up, but the brilliance of this show is how creative it gets without the use of any dialogue whatsoever (with the exception of a few rare instances in the series), and how it manages to continually deliver genius slapstick comedy without ever growing tiring or dull. Tom the cat is very easily identifiable as the "prick" of the series. He's almost always played out to be the villain with each 7-10 minute episode and a majority of the show often shows him either concocting or carrying out convoluted mouse-trap schemes which usually end in failure, and when he's not doing that he is often portrayed as acting like a jerk in some form. Jerry the mouse serves as his perfect foil and his basic role is usually to outwit his schemes, cause him to fail, and generally infuriate the hell out of him. Its a tried but true mechanism of slapstick that works well through fantastic animation and sound direction and just great animation in general.

Its not easy to give characters distinct personalities without having them speak, but Tom & Jerry accomplishes just that. On top of this it must be noted that due to its lack of dialogue it has some of the most universal appeal you can find in animation. Anything with dialogue is subject to both language and cultural barriers, and while slapstick itself may be remotely subject to some cultural barriers, it is easily the most universal form of comedic entertainment you can come up with, and its no wonder why Tom and Jerry has also been a phenomenal success in popularity overseas, which is a true testament to its value as a work of animation and art.

With the occasional exception of episodes which feature different versions of Tom and Jerry in alternate settings, such as the well-remembered episode "Touché, Pussy Cat!" (featuring a renaissance setting). But whichever format you saw them in, the characters were always completely recognizable and easy to be entertained by, and its no wonder that they have become some of animation's most iconic figures in all of animation history. From Academy Award winning episodes like "Quiet Please!" to....more Academy Award winning episodes like "The Cat Concerto," Tom and Jerry is almost always full of entertainment and holds up extremely well despite being over half a century old. If MGM's animated works were to come to ones mind, these 2 icons would always be the first ones that pop into one's mind, and Tom and Jerry would be the first series that they think of for quite a good reason.

Of course, another key part of the studio's history is when Fred "Tex" Avery joined and got his own directing division. Avery of course made a name for himself at Warner Bros for remodeling the very kind of entertainment that we expect from the Looney Tunes and was responsible for the first cartoons to star Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny, and he brought his zest for comic timing and insanity to MGM.

Avery was never big on recurring characters (he tried to kill Bugs off at Warner; when standards refuses, he left the studio), so it may not have been great for him that his most popular cartoons at MGM were those staring Droopy, the slow, sad-sounding pooch that always makes it out on top. A shame though, since Droopy is a great character with a great voice, whose depressive nature are made up by his tendency to fight back when provoked and dedication to getting the job done. His cartoons are full of laughs.

Then you have Screwy Squirrel, an nutty character akin to Tex's typical stuff. A nut and a half, Screwy messes with every and anyone that came his way until he can make his cartoons seem fit. Only a few of his cartoons were made before Avery eventually killed him off, but they remain as some of his best.

Arguably the cartoons that define Tex's style better than the rest, however, are his Red cartoons. The few shorts made starring the ever-horny wolf in his woman-loving rampage remain as racy cartoon masterpieces that explore the sexual desire of men in a way that just about no one else would dare to attempt. The ever-lovely Red performs her heart out to the men who come to her show, while the wolf... is just a wolf. It's great stuff, and the expressions you get from the characters in these shorts are the stuff of legends.

Be it cartoons featuring king-size canarys, mad maestros, cats that hate people, bad-luck blackies (cats), or George & Junior, a pair that seem similar to Steinback's George & Lennie, Avery made a plethora of great shorts that redefined what it means to be a funny cartoon and remain some of the best today.

Putting their 2 main sources responsible for some of the greatest productions of animation which MGM had to offer aside, MGM even had a fair amount of brilliance outside of what their Tom and Jerry shorts and what Avery himself worked on. Unfortunately if we were to go into those as well this entry may stretch on the length of a full-blown article (perhaps worth exploring at some point in the future). We will mention some of our personal recommendations, including (but certainly not limited to): The Milky Way, The Unwelcome Guest, Peace on Earth, The Impossible Possum, and The Dot and the Line (among many, many other fantastic works). Whether its their classic Tom and Jerry animation skits, Tex Avery's genius shorts, or just about anything else from MGM's animation department that you intend to watch, you can always be positive that you're in for some of animation history's finest quality of animation and entertainment.

Written by Ensatsu-Ken & Avaitor (Teamwork, yeah!)

11 -
Neon Genesis Evangelion

How do you classify Neon Genesis Evangelion? You don’t, really. It’s a psychologically disturbed and emotionally scarring clusterfuck of insane ideas that come together in the end to form a deranged and sometimes life-changing viewing experience that can be found nowhere else. It’s true that certain series have tried to emulate Evangelion’s excellence and success (here’s lookin’ at you, RahXephon), but none have succeeded (not even Rebuild, in my opinion). What makes this show so great is a bit unconventional from what one might normally expect; while some may identify with Shinji, virtually none of the characters are actually likable in the traditional sense. Rei has no personality or emotions, Asuka is a fucking asshole, Misato is a drunk, Gendo is the worst father in the world, the list goes on. The story itself comes off as rather generic at first with its “kids piloting giant robots to save Japan from being devastated further by aliens,” as well. Even the animation itself is sub-par, and can be downright lazy on occasion. So, what, then, makes NGE such a masterpiece?

It tackles themes few other anime attempt and does it better – and more maturely – than those that try. What begins like a C-grade shounen mecha anime eventually evolves into something both terrifying and meaningful. Those who can connect with Shinji on any sort of level will find a wonderful show filled with things that they’d never seen or even thought about before. While many may find the final two episodes to be “boring” or “contrived,” I challenge anyone who felt even a bit out of place in their teenage life to craft a more emotionally effective 48 minutes of animation. Yet what truly sets this series apart from other anime is the movie and conclusion, The End Of Evangelion, one of the finest pieces of cinema, animated or otherwise, ever produced. The visuals are magnificent, the violence shockingly brutal, and progression wonderfully thought-provoking. If you got anything out of the TV anime, you will get thrice that out of the movie.

To say that Neon Genesis Evangelion is controversial would be an understatement. Not once have I ever seen anyone say, “oh, it was okay, I guess.” Everyone who watches it either loves it to no end or detests it and everything it stands for. But those who can see what so many like about it and are able to become emotionally invested in it are in for a real treat, one that may not ever come about again within their lifetime.

Written by Foggle

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 10: 20-16

2011-07-06T12:16:00.000-04:00

20 -
Dragon Ball

This is the tale of a strange young boy with a monkey's tail, Son Goku, and the mystical adventures he partakes in....before ultimately becoming a hyper-buffed muscle-bound warrior who takes on intergalactic baddies who have enough power to destroy a few planets with just a flick of their wrist in an inevitable sequel series that didn't quite make our list. However, the reason that Dragon Ball takes a spot that most people would rank DBZ in is because DB succeeds largely at what it sets out to be: a perfectly constructed series of adventures and over-the-top martial arts fights, with an excellent sense of humor throughout the whole experience to go along with it!

Now to set any misconceptions about this series aside, its not full of dragged power-up scenes and battles that each take up enough episodes to fill out an entire short anime season of their own, nor is it the shonen series that started all of the ridiculous shonen cliches that we are accustom to from the medium in this day and age (in fact it mocked many of those things which were cliche even in its time). The reason Akira Toriyama was labeled as a genius for writing Dragon Ball was because he was naturally able to churn out extremely simple yet interesting characters, fun adventure scenarios, well-constructed action scenes, and fairly raunchy but undeniably charming humor each and every week throughout the manga's 11-year run. Toei adapted his manga into 2 series, but really only managed to capture the fun spirit of Toriyama's work with this adaptation of the first half of the series.

The series works for multiple reasons, but among the main ones is the character Son Goku himself, an eternally classic hero in the shonen genre. To be more specific it especially works since he is a young child for most of the series who was raised by his grandfather away from any sort of civilization or society for most of his life, so his naive nature and simple-minded persona come off as innocent (as opposed to when he still retains most of these qualities as an adult in DBZ, where its much less acceptable), and Goku himself comes off as a likable character who makes you want to follow the series to see what adventures or fights he will take part in next. Each story arc flows at a nice and consistent pace, with minimal padding for a series of this length and a decent amount of filler that is actually quite good by any standards, and not just relative to other filler in other series.

The series is filled with well-composed background music, on top of all of its other points of praise, which helps add something to almost every scene of the series, and can even be good enough to elicit an emotional response out of its audience, which is saying a lot for a series as simply constructed as this one. And, of course, this whole entry would be almost pointless if I didn't mention that it was in fact a huge influence on numerous popular mangaka who wrote future popular shonen series, including Eichiro Oda, who many know as the creator of the highly acclaimed manga One Piece.

To sum it up, Dragon Ball makes our list (no less in a fairly high ranking in which most other lists of this sort would rank its sequel series) because its one of the closest things that we have seen to a perfectly constructed adventure series, in which fights play a big part as well but never make the other aspects of the show take a back-seat. Its important to note that this is NOT simply a product of pure nostalgia, as the series has proven to stand the test of time with its mastery of memorable characters and adventure tales that can easily entertain young kids while simultaneously entertaining almost any full-grown adult (many of us at AR, included).

Written by Ensatsu-ken

19 -
Daria

Imagine if John Hughes made a TV series similar to his classic 80's high school films, focused less on the awkwardness of high schoolers, more on eccentric characteristics and stereotype bending, and social issues relatable on just about any level. That would be Daria, taken from a minor character in Beavis & Butthead, which somehow managed to become a more socially aware program than Mike Judge's show was.

Daria focuses on the titular heroine, a student at Lawndale high school who likes to read, think for herself, and is horribly apathetic. In other words, she's the "anti-teen", an undesirable personality with highly desirable grades. Daria's best friend Jane is an equal outcast- a gifted artist with an equally unmotivated spirit and a questionable family history. Their clever banter and mutual feeling of isolation help to build a chemistry that makes the show what it is.

But it's not just Jane who contributes to the main character's endeavors. Daria's parents, Helen and Jake mean well, but don't seem to get her as well as they think they do. Helen often chooses her work over her family, which alienates Helen from her motherly duties, while Jake, after all these years, still has emotional baggage the weight of a bowling ball bag to handle. Their love and support of Daria's intelligence and lack of convention is prevalent throughout however. Daria's sister Quinn is too self-centered and obsessed with her looks to show her affection to her sister, but even at early phases of the show, it's apparent that Quinn does love Daria.

The characters are a big part of the show, and another saving grace regarding the cast is the lack of black and white in the admit tingly cookie cutter personalities. Daria and Jane, as clever as they are, speak their issues more than act towards them, which they both get called out for at various points in the show. Quinn is shallow, but increasingly develops beyond the Fashion Club's stupidity as the show progresses. Kevin the QB and his ditzy cheerleader girlfriend Brittany are the toast of the town, but don't have a touch of malice on them, jealously aside. They genuinely act out of kindness, even if they don't get the point, and don't treat Daria as much of a lesser being. Even Ms. Lee, the money-grubbing principal, acts the way she does for the sake of Lawndale High. Just about every character on the show is well-balanced and has plenty of time to flesh out.

The writing is also tops. Daria might seem a little dated now that the show premiered over a decade ago, but even it's most dated references are still entertaining today. Fans of music, film, and literature will find a lot to enjoy, while the vast range of characterization lends itself to great dialogue on it's own. There are even moments of higher thought in which the strength of the writers and their understanding of the characters pull off legitimately touching moments.

Daria is a high school program unlike just about any before it, and unlike any after it. To find another show like it that treats audiences as well would be damn near impossible to do.

Written by Avaitor

18 -
Mobile Suit Gundam

Amuro Ray, the son of a weapon's technician, finds himself a Mobile Suit model when his colony is attacked during the One Year War. After discovering that he's able to rock a Gundam better than a lot of pilots, he then becomes enlisted to the Federation. He eventually encounters the famed Zeon principality pilot Char Aznable, and the rest is history.

Mobile Suit Gundam almost single-handily created the formula for one of the most viable types of anime- the mecha series. One that is continually stolen from today. You have the unsure rookie who starts off as a little rocky but eventually becomes one of the best fighters. A fairly big supporting cast that range from the motivating allies to the questionable rogues to BAMF pilots with previous experience. Tons of action on and off the war field. An ongoing storyline which starts off with a conflict-of-the-week format but cuts down to the point near the end. Themes of war and personal struggle repeated throughout. And a strongly defined relationship between the protagonist and antagonist.

The last is what draws a majority of fans in. Amuro and Char's struggles go beyond the war field, and become increasingly personal as this series and future ones progress. To not spoil this series for newcomers, one particular woman leaves an impact on both of their lives which continues to burn for the rest of their lives.

The original Gundam has inspired many, to the point that multiple prequels, continuations in numerous works of media, and movies, enough to result in there being various universes. Today, they're still making Gundam continuations all over the place and while there may never be an end, the original is what holds up among the best and what deserves a ranking more than anything.

Written by Avaitor

17 -
Futurama

From the famed creator of none other than The Simpsons, Matt Groening, we were treated to this futuristic comedy much in the same vein and sense of humor as the creator's first big animated series. In a way you could describe it as a more up to date interpretation of The Jetsons. The series starts off with one of the primary characters, a pizza delivery boy named Philip J. Fry getting trapped in a cryogenic freezing tube quite literally right before the dawn of the new millenium (the new millenium of that time being the 2000's. A thousand years later he awakes in futuristic world that's about to enter into the millenium of the 3000's, but all of that is just basic back story that you'll learn not to care about when you really get down to this show's main point: which is to basically make you laugh your ass off with some of the most brilliant use of humor that can be seen on an animated television show.

In the first episode we are also introduced to the 2 other primary characters of this show, Leela (a mostly stern female Cyclops who serves as a buffer of sorts to Fry's more goofy and idiotic personality; though with a healthy dose of her own ridiculous nature to contribute to the show) and Bender (a bending unit robot who drinks, smokes, and constantly delivers the best lines and contributes the largest amount to this shows humor). Fry, Leela, and Bender end up joining the Planet Express, an intergalactic delivery company (owned by a descendant of Fry of all people: Professor Farnsworth), and most of the show's shenanigans spawns from their adventures taking on crazy jobs as the company's delivery crew, traveling to strange or exotic alien planets and finding themselves in a plethora of strange and sometimes downright weird situations. In addition to the main cast we get a fair amount of supporting characters, both fellow Planet Express employees as well as various villanous figures such as Mom. The supporting characters complement the main characters very well and completes the package of what I must say is probably one of the funniest ensembles of a cast that I have seen in any animated program in my time.

What makes the show work so well is both the chemistry between these characters and the generally good writing. Watching the best-friend duo of Fry and Bender is always a treat and the ludicrous situations that they both get themselves in due to their common immature nature is big part of what gives life to this series. This of course usually gets Leela involved in order to save their asses, and having these 3 characters interact together is what makes up the heart of the show. That's not to say that its at all formulaic, though, as the series covers a wide variety of completely different plot set-ups with each episode, and in later seasons you'll be treated to some truly bizarre yet undeniably genius (from a writing and comedic standpoint) situations that the crew finds themselves in. In the vein of episodes that highly deliver on the pure comedy, I'd personally have to recommend "Fry and the Slurm Factory" and "Where No Fan Has Gone Before" among the purely zany comedy episodes (there are plenty of other great ones to be sure, but those are just personal favorites of mine).

Of course, this show wouldn't rank as high on our list as it does if it weren't something more than just good comedy. And, to the show's well deserved credit, it can do a damn good job of mixing in just the right amount of drama to actually get you feeling for the very same characters that you are laughing at throughout the entire show. Episodes like "Leela's Homeworld" and "Jurassic Bark" are superb examples of how you can have a ton of great comedy and just a small but undeniably great touch of sadness and drama in an animated comedy series and actually make it work. In general the characters can show some real touching sides to them when the writers see fit, but it never becomes too much as to feel out of place and this series never forgets that its primarily a great comedy, which is why it always works so damn well (and yes, I mean ALWAYS).

Futurama is indeed a fitting name for this show, in that I would swear that the show was ahead of its time in its comedic dialogue and delivery as well as its small but well appreciated dramatic touches, as nearly all of it holds up extremely well to this day.

*Editor's Note: Keep in mind that this entry was written with the first 4 seasons of the series in mind, before its initial cancellation. The later movies and new seasons on Comedy Central were not taken into account at the time that this entry was written.*

Written by Ensatsu-Ken

16 -
Justice League Unlimited

Take the incarnations of Batman and Superman that we've grown accustomed to in Bruce Timm's animated series, along with the brief glimpse of the Flash we met in Superman: TAS, add in new versions of Wonder Woman, Martian Manhunter and Hawkgirl, and bring in a fully-developed take of the Green Lantern John Stewart, and that's Justice League in a flash. Some of DC's most popular super heroes along with a couple of surprise choices taking on the world and favorite rivals.

Keep the same idea from the first 52 episodes of Justice League, but add in just about everyone else in the DC canon, including Supergirl, and then we get Unlimited, the equally popular continuation that lasted another three seasons and continued to build upon the characters.

If you're a fan of DC or super heroes in general, Justice League is a bit of a wet dream, since it encompasses so many of the best qualities of the mythology and doesn't lose much in translation. The characters are very well-defined, contain varied traits and qualities that can be found in their best stories, and are perfectly casted.

If you're not as big on them but still appreciate good storytelling, then JL is still highly recommended. You get enough time to get behind the core 7 Justice League members, as well as a bunch of the new ones, and the stories are very well-done. There's a strong balance between science fiction, reality-based crime, and personal dilemmas that are told throughout the entirety of the show. The stories are easy to go through, and are done well enough for practically anyone to get into.

Justice League was done in an era where Cartoon Network was still aimed for children, but had no problems aiming for older viewers. It's still good for kids, but there's enough adult situations, innuendos, and threatening plots for anyone far outside the usual demographic to get into it. Enough to bring in massive ratings for adult viewers, and still contain a giant cult following today, and still make action figures for, even 5 years after it's original run ending.

It's one of the best super hero shows ever made and is still a highlight for fans of the community today. An easy top 20 entry.

Written by Avaitor

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 9: 25-21

2011-07-05T12:14:00.000-04:00

25 -
Animaniacs

Zany to the max, bologna in our slacks, you know the thing. Animaniacs is arguably one of the biggest nostalgic favorites from people who were raised on 90's cartoons, and still holds up for the most part. It's a fun attempt to recreate the fun of the Warner cartoons with original characters, and has enough charm to stand on its own.

A spin-off of sorts from Tiny Toons, Animaniacs follows the wacky misadventures of the Warner Brothers, Yakko and Wakko, and the Warner Sister, Dot, as they attempt to make some kind of impact on the modern cartoon scene after losing the chance to make one back in the golden age of animation. Packed with the energy and zest of their Warner Bros. brethren, the little critters go all over the place to get some laughs, from practically every period of time to the sets of Barney, Power Rangers, Friends, and other 90's favorites.

They get followed by a bunch of other cartoon characters, like the retired Warners star Slappy Squirrel, the musically inclined Rita and Runt, and fellow entry Pinky & the Brain. The quality of their follow-ups vary, but you're bound to get some good stuff throughout.

Another part that people tend to remember is the music. The late Richard Stone, among other strong composers, created a lot of memorable numbers, from songs that teach you all the nations of the world and all the states and their capitals, to parodies of the Macarena and popular theme songs. Not to mention the show's own iconic theme song, which still burns in the heads of many, including the person who wrote this.

Animaniacs doesn't really work all the time. Sometimes the Warners get a little too cruel, and some of the supporting cartoons aren't as appealing. But when it works, it's great, definitely good enough to make it on here.

Written by Avaitor

24 -
Tiny Toon Adventures

They're tiny, they're toony, they're all a little looney, and hopefully I don't have to say any more to give you the idea of where I'm going. The first of Spielberg and Ruegger's collaborations with Warner Bros, Tiny Toons was the innovator and arguably the most aesthetically successful of them all.

The idea of the show was that the descendants of the classic Looney Tunes all go to school together and are taught by the masters themselves- Bugs, Daffy, Porky, Foghorn, and the gang. Here, they learn how to entertain like the Looneys and use this half-hour program to show off what they've learned Buster and Babs Bunny (no relation) are the hosts, while they also have close friends Plucky Duck and Hamton Pig keep up with them, among numerous other familiar characters.

The show has a good balance of short sketches put together to recreate the charm of the classics they're studying, with their own little twists, as well as ones that have their main characters make the best out of their experiences as children. Depending on the theme of the episode, you might catch poor kitty Furball miserably try little Sweetie, Babs try to sneak her way out of a family night in, or Plucky reminiscing on the days where he first learned that "water go down" the hole. Then you might even get full half-hour episodes that get a group of the characters to go through wacky or even not-so-wacky adventures together. You might even get an episode dedicated to music videos or television parodys.

And depending on who works on said cartoons and how they were handled, each of these situations could turn out to very entertaining. Tiny Toons was a good balance between classic conventions and modern standards in terms of animated storytelling. And thanks to a very talented staff, it worked more often than not, and holds up well.

Written by Avaitor

23 -
DuckTales

The spirit of adventure was something not often explored in animation back in the late 80s. I mean, sure there were adventure shows, but nothing ever managed to grasp the feeling of adventure as well as, say, the film classic, The Goonies. They all felt like the Superfriends, simple stories that simply changes locations to give the illusion of a grand adventure. However, DuckTales, based on Carl Barks' legendary comics, was not like that. One of the most important shows of the decade, and reason the childhood favorite block The Disney Afternoon exists, DuckTales knew everything there was to know about adventure and it made sure to tell you every single day of the week. That's right, not only was this 100 episode show of such high quality that it competed with shows on Saturday morning, but it was in fact a syndicated show that aired daily, blowing most offerings in the animated world away at the time.

Why was DuckTales a hit? Well, other than it being high quality in writing and characterization as well as fun for the whole family, it literally could do anything. One week it could be an adventure into a long forgotten culture, the next week it could be centered around the town of Duckburg (our heroes' main residence) to focus on smaller affairs, and the next it could be set in space, or it could center on romance, or... Well, you get the idea. The main cast was always fun to watch, whether it was the iconic and adventurous Scrooge McDuck, his nephews (Huey, Dewey, and Louie) who were always ready to look into things deeper than their uncle was, their foolish pilot Launchpad McQuack (quite possibly the best character to come out of the show who did not originate in the original comic) or the many other supporting characters, the DuckTales universe is as large as it is unique and tuning in to any given episode could give you a very different cast of characters than the next.

The show is still remembered today by those of us who grew up with the Disney Afternoon and is still looked back on, however, unlike most shows from childhood (that did not make the list for nostalgia goggles-related reasons) DuckTales still manages to hold up. The Disney Afternoon would gain a reputation for high quality syndicated shows (that it would unfortunately lose as it neared its end) as it went on, but it all started with DuckTales which is still arguably one of the best shows of the 1980s.

Written by Desensitized

22 -
Home Movies

The show I will forever associate with the potential Adult Swim once had, Home Movies is one of the best animated shows of all time. Interesting in that, it's not animated because what's done on the show wouldn't work in live action. No, it's animated because there would be no way for the show to work right otherwise... it's hard to explain. Home Movies was a very unique show in more than one way. Heavily driven by it's dialogue and unique characters, Home Movies is a show that could only be done in animation, and a show that could have only lived on Adult Swim. (Even if it lived on UPN for a few episodes in 1999, it bombed rather badly) The show somehow managed 4 seasons and 52 episodes, and still lives on with one of the strongest cult audiences for an animated show, possibly only topped by King Of The Hill or Invader ZIM.

The show is about a boy named Brendon Small who likes to make home movies with his friends that are based (usually unintentionally) on the things that happen in his life. It's very straightforward, and is brilliant in it's simple premise. The people Brendon encounters in his life are usually rather normal, just a little off in their quirks in order to affect Brendon's life in simple and subtle, yet important ways. The most important character to demonstrate this (and the show's most popular character) is Coach Jon McGuirk, a loud, drunk, crude, and insensitive middle aged man who has a very skewed take on life and society all of which usually tend to rub off on Brendon in ways that aren't always obvious.

Home Movies is a very subtle show, with a very peculiar depth, charm, and soul to it that none of it's creators, or the network that aired it, have managed to match yet.

Written by Desensitized

21 -
South Park

In 1997, creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone debuted their soon to become popular animated comedy series, South Park. The show started out as a notoriously offensive and raunchy comedy with plenty of shock and gross-out humor to go around, and since the beginning has generally followed the adventures of 4 boys, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny, that revolve around the strange town of South Park that they live in, full of idiotic adults and plenty of absurd plot set-ups for just about each episode. As of today....its still and offensive and raunchy show that churns out plenty of gross-out humor (though the shock value of all that has all but worn itself out). Where the show managed to truly shine, though, was when it evolved its humor to incorporate more intelligent jokes, a fair amount of obvious but undeniably funny social commentary, and when it managed to brilliantly mix it in with its own strange style of humor from the early episodes.

South Park didn't truly gain its footing in this regard until its 3rd season, which is really when the show started to push toilet-humor into the background in favor of much more clever writing and honestly better jokes. What arguably kept people coming back to the show was the boys, though, which is what this series is really all about when it comes down to it. Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny, are basically characters that represent how kids act and think when their parents are not around, yet they are such fun characters to watch, and the way that they interact or drive the episodic plots forward really makes what could have been another lame attempt at an offensive comedy show into something far more entertaining. Stan and Kyle make a perfect pair of best friends who both serve as the more sensible and reasonable yet sometimes mischievous characters of the series. Its arguably Cartman who almost single-handedly defines this show's sense of humor. He is probably the most despicable character in every single one of his mannerisms, using his ingenious planning for various schemes that are at the very least for his own selfish gain and at the worst....well, lets just say that he's the exact opposite of the kid that you would think of as being a perfect little angel. Yet, despite having no likeable qualities about him, he is by far the most entertaining character in the series and its almost impossible to hate him, especially when he is the biggest contributor to some of the best moments of animated comedy over the course of the show's run. As for Kenny....he usually dies (in almost each single episode for the first few seasons of the show) before he really has anytime to make an impact on viewers, yet somehow people still remember him for his various notorious death scenes, and I'd be lying if I said that even a few of those didn't manage to get me laughing.

On the whole, while some may argue that South Park has lost its edge in recent years or that it was just a crappy comedy loaded with toilet-humor at its heart, it can't be denied of its huge impact among animated comedy shows that air on television. In truth, its far from a perfect series, but at its highs it manages to be a brilliant satire of various popular social and cultural trends and it manages to give out social commentary without ever forgetting the kind of ridiculous and offensive show that it is. I suppose you could say that at its core, South Park is the right way to do offensive comedy and make social commentary without feeling annoyingly preachy or forgetting that its supposed to actually be funny. Over the years it has no doubt garnered its fair share of haters, but when really looked at for what it is its easily one of the funniest and most entertaining animated comedies that has aired since its debut, and the fact that its still been running to this day is strong evidence that it has continued to remain funny and enjoyable, and its for that reason that this series has a spot on our list.

Written by Ensatsu-Ken

Animation Revelation's Top 65 Cartoons- Part 8: 30-26

2011-07-04T11:19:00.000-04:00

30 -
The Huckleberry Hound Show

Ruff & Reddy may have been Bill Hanna and Joe Barbera's first hit series from their studio, but Huck was their first superstar.

The Huckleberry Hound Show, even early on, had a big following of all ages on the airwaves. Thanks to scripts by Friz Freleng's storyman Warren Foster in it's second season and the endearing characters of Huck, Yogi and Boo Boo, and Pixie, Dixie, and Mr. Jinks, there was plenty to love about the show, despite the limited animation. Even that had it's charms, due to ex-MGM and Warner animation royalty.

At it's best, the three ongoing cartoons were satires of cartoon staples at the time which also expanded on them. Huck mocked and celebrated the everyday straight man's struggles, which often were attacked in these cartoons. Huckleberry gave audiences a breath of fresh air by making the job-chasing Hound a relatable lead, and having his wise-cracking animal attackers seem lame and hokey in comparison. Meanwhile, Pixie and Dixie called back to Bill and Joe's fabled cat and mouse duo, but added a second mouse for some charming commentary on the predictable slapstick violence from the chase. Then we had Yogi Bear, who was reminiscent of a few notable clever, big-mouthed leads. Unlike Bugs and Daffy, who wrecked havoc out of defense uninterrupted however, Yogi had a well-meaning sidekick in Boo Boo to keep him in check, while the ever-changing Ranger Smith wanted to protect the bear rather than kidnap him.

It's these little pushes on top of the clever writing that made the Huckleberry Hound Show an instant classic. Although the later episodes where Yogi got his own show and had his segments replaced with Hokey Wolf weren't as good, it's easy to forget them.

Written by Avaitor

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Pinky & The Brain

Spun-off from Animaniacs as a new series to help build up the then-new Kids WB! line-up, Pinky & the Brain is a series that equaled, sometimes even surpassed, it's predecessor.

The story is the same on the series as it was in the original shorts- two lab mice, named Brain and Pinky, one a genius, the other insane, leave their lab containers each night as they attempt to take over the world. It's a tried but true plot, which is part of the show's charm. You get two likable characters use some of the most inane ideas ever conceived to achieve their vengeance against humanity each week, and their ideas get increasingly wacky and convulted as they go along. And the two use everything- from half-baked sitcoms to hypnotizing tanning lotion to forming a basketball team, Brain and Pinky use everything in the book, and get various results along the way.

It's the chemistry between the two characters that really works towards its advantage, though. Brain's annoyance is highly palpable throughout, but it's clear at the same time that he cares greatly for Pinky, while the big guy is just too naive half of the time to understand why his buddy is so cranky, but still tries to be the best mouse he can be. You get a plethora of clever lines spouted out between the two for this, as well as some heartwarming moments as well. The goofy plots and sharp writing are obviously important points of the show, but it's the relationship of the two characters that puts it above all else.

Written by Avaitor

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Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni (When They Cry)

Few cartoons (and even fewer anime) can truly be described as “powerful.” And yet, despite poor first impressions, bad production values, and an irritating fanbase, Higurashi no Naku Koro ni (known internationally under the localized name “When They Cry”) succeeds on all fronts at crafting a gripping narrative that sucks the audience into a world filled with lovable characters, insane conspiracy theories, and horrifying situations. After a cutesy introduction to our five leading characters, things go south fast and one of our protagonists ends up spilling the blood of his friends and then does the same to his own. It’s as enthralling as you’d hope, and ends up leaving the audience asking “why?” And why you will eventually discover, as the rest of the series plays out like a fucked up version of Groundhog Day, with an endless time loop that gives you great insight into the mind of every character, even ones who don’t seem important at first.

Things get increasingly more disturbing and troubling as the 26 episode first season barrels onward, but shortly after the second series – Kai – gets going, it drops all pretense of horror and leaves its promise of violence and torture at the door in favor of some wonderful character drama. By the time this happens, you will absolutely love every single major character and certain scenes actually come off as moving. I’m not afraid to admit that there are moments where I teared up a bit (but I didn’t cry; I’m not a bitch, asshole). The series shines brightest in the penultimate story arc, and at times might even make you want to know these people in real life. It does get a bit cheesy at times (I’ve noticed that Japanese writing tends to not understand the meaning of “subtlety”), but never so much that it kills a scene or ruins the mood.

Putting aside the fact that the entirely unimportant epilogue, Rei, is horribly pedestrian and downright boring, the series does end a bit anti-climatically. It’s not horrible at all, but one gets the impression that it could have been handled much better. But at least the ending wraps things up and serves as a conclusion, unlike so many other television programs, so it is to be commended on that account.

It’s worth noting that the English dub is positively rancid and was only made for the first season, since Geneon/Funimation didn’t make enough money off that one to fund an official localization of Kai. The Japanese voice track is perfect, however, with wonderful performances that really add to the atmosphere and personality of the characters.

You might not want to commit to a 50 episode series where the first 10-15 minutes play out like a bad slice of life for girls and pedophiles, but you won’t regret it in the least of you decide to. Just stay the hell away from the spiritual successor, Umineko.

Written by Foggle

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The Boondocks

Based off of Aaron McGruder's controversial comic strip, The Boondocks is a show that loses none of it's controversy and helps to build upon said strip by using it's characters and the medium to its advantage.

Huey and Riley Freeman are two elementary-school aged brothers of African-American descent who live with their grandfather Robert (the whereabouts of their parents are undetermined throughout, but they're considered dead) in a upper-class white suburban neighborhood. The Freeman clan make their best to fit in and meet colorful characters along the way, like the self-hating racist Uncle Ruckus, multi-millionaire Ed Wuncler, his over-privileged hoodlum grandson Ed III and best friend Gin Rummy, and the daunty DuBois clan.

Each character is filled to their bones with bad traits, but that's where a lot of the humor comes from, since there is so few good in between the bad that each character relates. Huey is a self-righteous freedom fighter with little compassion for mankind, Riley aspires to be a convict, Robert is an egotistical fool, Ruckus is a venom-spouting maniac, Tom DuBois is oblivious to his actions, and so on. The strange thing is that each of these characters mean well more often than not, and rarely use their flaws in character out of intentional spite. They're done more for laughs than anything, and work most of the time.

And even then, it's just plain funny on it's own. When it goes for simple laughs, like the Stinkmeaner or A Pimp Named Slickback sagas, it works at delivering oddball storylines with glimpses of heart in between. When they get more topical, like a Werner Herzog-directed documenatry on the presidential election of Barack Obama or bringing Martin Luther King back to life to criticize what he has fought for, the show is even funnier as it tries to bridge the gap between satire and just plain outlandish humor.

Some episodes, or just the whole show in general, may be harder to sell for audiences than others, but that's the same with all good satires. And the way The Boondocks does it is a strong part of the show's success. Also having some top notch animation, even if the designs also aren't for everyone, in a type of animated series where animation is second to last priority, is another. And just being a ray of tough, honest humor that isn't entirely fratboy or toilet humor based on [adult swim]'s schedule is a blessing.

Written by Avaitor

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Invader Zim

On the planet Irk, the tallest rule over the rest of the civilization, as they plan Operation Impending Doom II, when as many of the Irkens travel across the universe to conquer as many planets as they can. All goes well until Zim, an Irken Invader banished after destructing the first Operation Impending Doom, quits his banishment so he can become a part of the next Operation. Reluctant to give him another shot, the Almighty Tallest send Zim to the last planet they can find, Earth, and send him there with a defunct SIR unit, which should be his robot guardian.

Zim lands on Earth with Gir, his unit, as they intend to take over it while fitting into society. Zim enrolls into public school where he seems to fit in, except for the paranormal-obsessed Dib, who notices something is off with Zim.

And here is Invader Zim, arguably the most intense and controversial series to air in Nickelodeon's history. It seems unfathomable that a show that expects us to laugh at the concept of a confused alien swallow the organs of various humans to make him seem "more normal or a child who is constantly attacked and put under extreme forms of therapy would air on such a child-friendly channel after the days of Rocko and Ren & Stimpy were done with.

The strange thing is that this works, and the show is hilarious throughout. Its humor is very black, combined with a huge supply of randomness along the way. The constant struggle that both Zim and Dib go through contrast among each other well and make for good episodes focusing on one, the other, or both. When things get a little too dull with just one, the insanely wacky Gir and Dib's apathetic sister Gaz make up for that, among other supporting characters.

If you're able to handle dark comedy and the insanity of Gir, Invader Zim should be up your alley. It has a brief run (27 fully made episodes), but just about every one of them is worth watching.

Written by Avaitor